[SlumberKitty]

Hi friends,

When I was in the psychiatric hospital recently, I was sitting in on a CD group (Chemical dependency) because the more groups you go to, the more that the staff see you interacting positively with others, the greater the likelihood that you will get released sooner. I don't have a CD problem but I thought what the hay. I might as well sit in on the group because I do have a self harm addiction.

One thing I learned during that group was the difference between a lapse and a relapse.

A lapse is when one makes a mistake, like an alcoholic that drinks at his daughter's wedding. Technically he has fallen off the wagon, but if the next day he gets up and abstains and does not go back to drinking, it is a lapse.

A relapse is when the same alcoholic has a drink at his daughter's wedding, feels like crap about himself for drinking again, and then goes on a week long binge with alcohol--going back into the behavior that he is trying to get away from.

So I was telling this to my T in terms of self harm. Because I think I have had both, lapses and relapses. Lately it has been relapses, but before that I think they were lapses.

This puts me in a more compassionate viewpoint of myself. I don't have to beat myself up if I self harm, and then get right back up on the horse and try to not do it the next day.

I don't know....what do you all think? My T thought it was a good distinction.

HUGS Kit

[MuddyBoots]

I've heard this too, although my community center just calls everything a "recurrence" rather than lapse/relapse. I personally don't buy into any of it. I have substance use issues and I don't say I "had a recurrence/relapse/lapse." I just say "I used [x amount] of [substance] [y] times." Simpler and doesn't require them to waste precious minutes asking "how many times?" "how much?" "what substance?"

I feel like with self harm I can just say "I cut." or "I burned" or whatever I did.