[HALLIEBETH87]

I had to talk to a pyschiatrist and my T read his report at our next session. He said I am alexythymic and show traits of Borderline Personality Disorder. Someome translate..please!!!! <font color="blue"> </font>

[(JD)]

welcome!

alexithymia is the inability to express emotions verbally.

borderline personality disorder is a personality disorder marked by a long-standing pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, behavior, mood, and self -image that can interfere with occupational functioning or cause extreme emotional distress.

seems you fit right into these forums

again, welcome!

[HALLIEBETH87]

i guess i do but i am kinda a freak. maybe u guys understand though. no one else does!

[Zenobia]

I had never heard of alexythymic. Interesting. I am glad Sky has. I have been diagnosed with BPD. It is difficult to say the least but recovery is possible. I have made great strides in becoming the person I used to wish I could be...basically just happy instead of empty. It takes time but it does get better. My stay in the hospital was the beginning of the long process of self discovery. But it has happened. At my last therapy session I was talking about work. My therapist works as a liason at my work so she personally knows everyone I talk about. I was describing my troubles with my manager and how I was working my way through them. My T said to me "Have you ever thought that maybe you are farther along (in awareness) then she is?" This was quite a shocking statement. When I was first diagnosed I felt like a freak, just like you stated. Now my T is telling me that I am actually probably in a better state then a so called "normal" person. I still have BPD. I still struggle with self injury. I still have a heck of a time managing personal relationships BUT I am AWARE. I know what is happening and why it is happening. Or sometimes I don't know what is happening but I know that something is worg and that there are ways to make it better though I still have troubles remember what those ways happen to be. The "Normal" people will never have the opportunity to reach the level of self awareness that we achieve in our efforts at creating our own mental health. So for me, I have acceptable BPD as a blessing in my life. Tomorrow however will be a different story. Ha ha.
Carrie

[HALLIEBETH87]

thank u for replying