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#1
Feb 01, 2009, 02:20 PM
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Hi everyone,
i do SI for over 12 years now. It got absolutely better over the last years, but i really canīt stop it. I know all the skills like cold water or writing, painting and so on. But if my head says: do it ... i cannot avoid SI ...i just can retard it. At the moment i wanna do SI but i really donīt know why...and i donīt know how i can avoid doing it....
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a speranza č l'ultima a morire
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#2
Feb 01, 2009, 08:19 PM
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Carmelina, can you get a piece of paper and write down everything that comes into your head - I find this helps me find out why I want to SI.
Are you seeing a T? they can help with this - also read through the stickys at the top of the page they have lots of ideas to do when you want to SI - Holding ice in your hand can help - drawing lines on youself where you would cut can help - taking a long shower - if you have a T imagine what they would say to you now - there are safer ways to cope - you just have to find the one that works for you now. Please be safe - P7 
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Its not how many times you fall down that counts  its how many times you get back up!   (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture  )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#3
Feb 02, 2009, 02:41 PM
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Yeah writing down what is in my head helps sometimes but often there is too much in my head so i couldn`t write down these things - iīm not able to separate the chaos in my head.
I see my T every tuesday - i think i should talk to her tomorrow... she doesn`t know that i did SI yesterday and the week before... Yeah i think youīre right - i`ll have to find the one that works for me..
__________________
a speranza č l'ultima a morire
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#4
Feb 03, 2009, 01:02 AM
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I hope your appt went well
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#5
Feb 03, 2009, 12:04 PM
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Oh thanks Phoenix... My appt was really good, but i couldnīt tell her that i did SI... We talked about the bulimia and the dissos i have...
But itīs ok i think. The time with my T was as always too short... Sheīs relly a very good T and a nice person
__________________
a speranza č l'ultima a morire
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#6
Feb 04, 2009, 01:00 AM
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Im glad you had a good session - maybe you can mention it next time -
yep sessions are never long enough - no matter how long - its right at the end that you get to the stuff you need to discuss - I do anyway  - take care - stay safe P7
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#7
Feb 04, 2009, 10:47 PM
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My MH nurse who visits me at home says that SI has been such a part of my life for so many years as a coping mechanism that it is natural to revert back to it when the urge comes up. Lessening it and even stopping for periods are great but the 1st instinct will be to go what I know best and what has worked for me over the years. When I do slip up my t and I just go back to our CBT work and focus part of each session on that to try and reduce/stop the SI again. She also says that the addiction is just like somking, and for many smokers when they quit the urge/craving never goes away; instead they have to fight it every day...
It sounds like you have a lot of resources, skills and strength to help you in this journey so I wish you luck.
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I know that behind every grey cloud there is a silver lining; I just need to be patient enough to find it!!! |
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#8
Feb 05, 2009, 02:30 AM
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Quote:
I found out, that during the times i do SI - my bulimia is mostly less to the fore and vice versa. Except the times iīm badly off....
__________________
a speranza č l'ultima a morire
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#9
Feb 05, 2009, 06:15 AM
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but with Time and a good T that can change - its hard and somtimes its two steps forward one step back - but there is hope
somtimes it seems like there isnt - but its there lurking in the corner waiting for you to find it - I hope you find it soon P7
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#10
Feb 05, 2009, 03:31 PM
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I hope so! But i think iīm headed in the right direction with my T...
Today itīs so hard for me to be strong ... but i do my best!
__________________
a speranza č l'ultima a morire
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#11
Feb 05, 2009, 06:55 PM
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Im glad you think you are doing well with your T - thats great - hang in there = and you're best IS good enough - - thats all you can do -please be kind to you and be safe P7
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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