[DocJohn]

Sexual addiction has come out of the closet, so to speak, in recent years and now appears to be recognized as a legitimate problem some people face. In recognition of this, we've created this forum to offer a supportive place for people who grapple with sexual addiction.

"Sexual addiction" is not a recognized mental health diagnosis at this time.

Please note that if you're easily triggered or are a minor, this forum may not be for you as much of the material discussed here will be possibly triggering or of a sexual nature.

Also, healthy interest in sex -- especially as a teenager, adolescent, or young adult -- is not considered a sex addiction. Here are the proposed symptoms of sex addiction:

http://psychcentral.com/lib/symptoms...diction/000745

DocJohn

[Brian37]

thanks for the info...as I sex addict myself, I find it very hard to find any mental health professionals with any experience in this area...unless you live in a large metro area

[tlaxyl]

Originally Posted by Brian37

thanks for the info...as I sex addict myself, I find it very hard to find any mental health professionals with any experience in this area...unless you live in a large metro area

Is there a listing of counselors specializing in treatment for sex addiction?

[dannyrose]

Originally Posted by Brian37

thanks for the info...as I sex addict myself, I find it very hard to find any mental health professionals with any experience in this area...unless you live in a large metro area

I've only just realised I'm a sex addict even though I don't sleep around

[KChrispcat]

Originally Posted by DocJohn

Sexual addiction has come out of the closet, so to speak, in recent years and now appears to be recognized as a legitimate problem some people face. In recognition of this, we've created this forum to offer a supportive place for people who grapple with sexual addiction.

Please note that if you're easily triggered or are a minor, this forum may not be for you as much of the material discussed here will be possibly triggering or of a sexual nature.

DocJohn

What is the definition of a sex addict?

[need_it_bad]

how does one know if they have a sexual problem or just really enjoy sex. I find myself always wanting it, even thou I was just satisfied. My husband will give me sex and I will orgasim, but then that night be able to get myself off again and then keep doing at least once a day if not more. Do I just love sex and the way it feels or do I have a problem. I am afraid to go to a place because I am thinking that I will want to hook up with someone there and have sex with them.

[babyfairyfifi]

Originally Posted by need_it_bad

how does one know if they have a sexual problem or just really enjoy sex. I find myself always wanting it, even thou I was just satisfieId. My husband will give me sex and I will orgasim, but then that night be able to get myself off again and then keep doing at least once a day if not more. Do I just love sex and the way it feels or do I have a problem. I am afraid to go to a place because I am thinking that I will want to hook up with someone there and have sex with them.

I'm a reformed sex addict but have had periods of no libido whatsoever ( due to depression, l later found out) and now have a high sex drive but do not have the sex addiction any longer.
You ask how to tell if you are a sex addict or not? From the main body of your question it seemed to me that you were just highly sexed but then I got to the last line :I am afraid to go to a place because I am thinking that I will want to hook up with someone there and have sex with them.

That line in itself may indicate a sex addiction depending on what that fear is based on, and how much that fear intrudes into your normal life.
In my mind, any addiction is easily identified as it is behaviour that gets in the way of having a 'normal' existence. If you are feeling horny and you have sex 20 times a day and feel great, and it doesn't impact negatively on your life or the life of your loved ones, then hey go for it! But, if you feel you need to have sex compulsively despite the ramifications and disruption it may cause to the rest of your life and your family, then that is a clear indication of an addiction.

My experience of sex addiction was that it was my way of trying to comfort myself after painful emotional incidences. I would reach for the phone to call someone to come over absolutely compulsively , but then never actually enjoy the encounter. I would reach orgasm but feel horribly removed emotionally and would often cry afterwards. I would always regret the encounter, but that in turn would lead to a vicious circle of my feeling low, then reaching for the phone once more.
It was only when I shared this with my sister ( who self harms) did I realise that that my behaviour and feelings leading up to the compulsion matched hers before she cut herself. I used a different implement to harm myself ...

My addiction came from a non sexual root, my early years relationship with my mother who has NPD.

I've now explored and come to terms with my past, and my sexual addiction has evaporated.
In its place is good self esteem, access to intimacy and a healthy , loving, fulfilling sex life.

Good luck, it's a long hard journey ahead, but it's worth it.

[MOHANAKRISHNAN]

Originally Posted by babyfairyfifi

I'm a reformed sex addict but have had periods of no libido whatsoever ( due to depression, l later found out) and now have a high sex drive but do not have the sex addiction any longer.
You ask how to tell if you are a sex addict or not? From the main body of your question it seemed to me that you were just highly sexed but then I got to the last line :I am afraid to go to a place because I am thinking that I will want to hook up with someone there and have sex with them.

That line in itself may indicate a sex addiction depending on what that fear is based on, and how much that fear intrudes into your normal life.
In my mind, any addiction is easily identified as it is behaviour that gets in the way of having a 'normal' existence. If you are feeling horny and you have sex 20 times a day and feel great, and it doesn't impact negatively on your life or the life of your loved ones, then hey go for it! But, if you feel you need to have sex compulsively despite the ramifications and disruption it may cause to the rest of your life and your family, then that is a clear indication of an addiction.

My experience of sex addiction was that it was my way of trying to comfort myself after painful emotional incidences. I would reach for the phone to call someone to come over absolutely compulsively , but then never actually enjoy the encounter. I would reach orgasm but feel horribly removed emotionally and would often cry afterwards. I would always regret the encounter, but that in turn would lead to a vicious circle of my feeling low, then reaching for the phone once more.
It was only when I shared this with my sister ( who self harms) did I realise that that my behaviour and feelings leading up to the compulsion matched hers before she cut herself. I used a different implement to harm myself ...

My addiction came from a non sexual root, my early years relationship with my mother who has NPD.

I've now explored and come to terms with my past, and my sexual addiction has evaporated.
In its place is good self esteem, access to intimacy and a healthy , loving, fulfilling sex life.

Good luck, it's a long hard journey ahead, but it's worth it.

It can b justified that that ur love and affection is not an addiction, and it has been manifested with original love and thirst..enjoy it..

[MagicMan21]

Wow! what an enlightening post. my own addiction doesn't sound so bad, but that i use it much similar to yours...i turn to sex for comfort...not actually having it but anything related. I want to find the better coping mechanisms. This latest incident caused me to lose my job. It wasn't overt sex, but rather looking for a cheap thrill to wake me up or maybe just get that conquest.
one great coping mechanism is humor. my ex-girlfriend always tries to make people laugh. i think its her narcissistic competitive side - she wants people to like her - but, nonetheless it is a novel idea to me and could have great benefits.
another coping mechanisms muddled in my ex is my running. I ran my butt off the last time she left me. i entered a half-marathon on very short notice. she told me that was one time she was most proud of me. it just so happens the guy she is talking to is a great runner. i think she may have taken away running as a coping tool for me this time.
i also know my ex is an abuser coming from an abused home. it was easy for her to abuse me and this lead to my own poor maladaptive behaviors...i cracked in a spooky, creepy sexual way.
i want to firmly remove this coping style and replace it with unflappable self esteem and get that winning smile back.

Originally Posted by babyfairyfifi

I'm a reformed sex addict but have had periods of no libido whatsoever ( due to depression, l later found out) and now have a high sex drive but do not have the sex addiction any longer.
You ask how to tell if you are a sex addict or not? From the main body of your question it seemed to me that you were just highly sexed but then I got to the last line :[COLOR=blue]I am afraid to go to a place because I am thinking that I will want to hook up with someone there and have sex with them.

That line in itself may indicate a sex addiction depending on what that fear is based on, and how much that fear intrudes into your normal life.
In my mind, any addiction is easily identified as it is behaviour that gets in the way of having a 'normal' existence. If you are feeling horny and you have sex 20 times a day and feel great, and it doesn't impact negatively on your life or the life of your loved ones, then hey go for it! But, if you feel you need to have sex compulsively despite the ramifications and disruption it may cause to the rest of your life and your family, then that is a clear indication of an addiction.

My experience of sex addiction was that it was my way of trying to comfort myself after painful emotional incidences. I would reach for the phone to call someone to come over absolutely compulsively , but then never actually enjoy the encounter. I would reach orgasm but feel horribly removed emotionally and would often cry afterwards. I would always regret the encounter, but that in turn would lead to a vicious circle of my feeling low, then reaching for the phone once more.
It was only when I shared this with my sister ( who self harms) did I realise that that my behaviour and feelings leading up to the compulsion matched hers before she cut herself. I used a different implement to harm myself ...

My addiction came from a non sexual root, my early years relationship with my mother who has NPD.

I've now explored and come to terms with my past, and my sexual addiction has evaporated.
In its place is good self esteem, access to intimacy and a healthy , loving, fulfilling sex life.

Good luck, it's a long hard journey ahead, but it's worth it.

/COLOR]

[David890]

Originally Posted by babyfairyfifi

I'm a reformed sex addict but have had periods of no libido whatsoever ( due to depression, l later found out) and now have a high sex drive but do not have the sex addiction any longer.
You ask how to tell if you are a sex addict or not? From the main body of your question it seemed to me that you were just highly sexed but then I got to the last line :I am afraid to go to a place because I am thinking that I will want to hook up with someone there and have sex with them.

That line in itself may indicate a sex addiction depending on what that fear is based on, and how much that fear intrudes into your normal life.
In my mind, any addiction is easily identified as it is behaviour that gets in the way of having a 'normal' existence. If you are feeling horny and you have sex 20 times a day and feel great, and it doesn't impact negatively on your life or the life of your loved ones, then hey go for it! But, if you feel you need to have sex compulsively despite the ramifications and disruption it may cause to the rest of your life and your family, then that is a clear indication of an addiction.

My experience of sex addiction was that it was my way of trying to comfort myself after painful emotional incidences. I would reach for the phone to call someone to come over absolutely compulsively , but then never actually enjoy the encounter. I would reach orgasm but feel horribly removed emotionally and would often cry afterwards. I would always regret the encounter, but that in turn would lead to a vicious circle of my feeling low, then reaching for the phone once more.
It was only when I shared this with my sister ( who self harms) did I realise that that my behaviour and feelings leading up to the compulsion matched hers before she cut herself. I used a different implement to harm myself ...

My addiction came from a non sexual root, my early years relationship with my mother who has NPD.

I've now explored and come to terms with my past, and my sexual addiction has evaporated.
In its place is good self esteem, access to intimacy and a healthy , loving, fulfilling sex life.

Good luck, it's a long hard journey ahead, but it's worth it.

Hi can I ask how you managed to over come your addiction? I'm new to the site and don't know how to navigate it really but did you have a lot of counselling for example?

[dannyrose]

Originally Posted by need_it_bad

how does one know if they have a sexual problem or just really enjoy sex. I find myself always wanting it, even thou I was just satisfied. My husband will give me sex and I will orgasim, but then that night be able to get myself off again and then keep doing at least once a day if not more. Do I just love sex and the way it feels or do I have a problem. I am afraid to go to a place because I am thinking that I will want to hook up with someone there and have sex with them.

Hi. I have the same problem.My wife makes me orgasm and gets me hard again but soon after I want to masturbate on a phone sex line. She does not know.

[lonelyperson92]

I need help, please look at the newest thread.

I want to get rid of this addiction because for me, it's disgusting, filthy and dirty.

Please help me.

[ArieTheFighter]

You consider sex disgusting, filthy and dirty? In my case I believe sex is amazing and great, it can be use for good purposes and connection and creation, but, in my case I use it to destroy myself and diminishes my quality of life and creates distress...

Arie

Originally Posted by lonelyperson92

I need help, please look at the newest thread.

I want to get rid of this addiction because for me, it's disgusting, filthy and dirty.

Please help me.

[Projectra]

Hi everyone.
I am fresh in this group as well. However, I am not that fresh with addictions. I used to do hard drugs as a teen and went through 2 years of re-hab and 3 more years of therapy. I guess my sex addiction took a full swing before I was 20 years old. I never realized I was sex addict. For years I was reasoning for myself that I am only treating guys just as they were treating me.

You know, I always had this feeling that I can’t be loved, and people just wants sex from me. Sex kind of become a tool to feel powerful. Independent. To revenge. To punish. And so on. I also thought that at least I am living a boring life. I never told anyone how many partners I have had.

Until I met a man who was another traumatized sex addict. He forced me to reflect my own behavior by having multiple partners alongside me (just like I had other partners alongside him). I got very upset by his behavior and walked away. It took me months to analyses why I got so angry from something that I have done over and over again. It also made me realize how my action have hurt many people and I have quite likely broken hearts. After him however I felt that I don't want this no more; always new guys, always lying or hiding the truth. And it could be said that last year I started my recovery.

So after over a year I met him again and he wanted me to be him again. I was seeing him briefly and we had very honest conversations about our sexual history. But unlike me, he did not see any problems of having countless numbers of partners. His attitude was more like at least we lived. I am not so sure about it. I think now-a-days that I actually I lost more than gained with my little addiction. I lost the possibility for a lifelong companion and shared memories. I felt torn as at the same time I felt that he is like me, he can understand me like I can understand him, and I honestly felt that we were meant to be. However, at the same time he made me feel bad, like really bad, as nothing has changed with him, and I don't think he was willing to face his problems. So, I walked away again 4 months ago.

While I was away from him and I avoided sex, guess what I did? I started drinking. One bottle of wine per evening can't hurt anyone eh? So, in order not to shag anything that moves I numb myself with the booze. Today I admitted to myself that I am an sex addict. And in order to obtain a better life and to some degree a healthy relationship I need to face my trauma, problems and be an active part of my personal change. I want to heal.I am done with addictions ruling my life. And I have been wrong all my life: I am worthy of love.

In order to get help for sex addiction is it not easy where I live in. There are not literally any help available for sex addicts apart from couple of SAA groups and those are all for males.

Sorry for spelling mistakes and possibly missing words.

[bigal838]

Hello!!

My addiction to internet porn has gotten out of control.
It's been robbing me of $$ but, even worse, robbing me of valuable time that I could be spending on my business instead.

I know what I need to do, but have been unable to do it:
I feel like all I need to do is make spending time watching porn very UNAPPEALING and make spending time on my business very APPEALING.

Does anyone have any advice or suggestions?
It will be appreciated.

[anneavonlee]

Hello, I am Anne. I don't know how to use this forum or this whole site, I can't seem to understand where posting should be placed for new comers. If you could help me that would be great. Thanks

[Christina86]

Originally Posted by anneavonlee

Hello, I am Anne. I don't know how to use this forum or this whole site, I can't seem to understand where posting should be placed for new comers. If you could help me that would be great. Thanks

Hello! Welcome!

New Member Introductions is here: http://forums.psychcentral.com/forumdisplay.php?f=40 Click "NEW THREAD" to make your own post!

[chasity]

Welcome. I'm new too.

[beboegypt]

Originally Posted by anneavonlee

Hello, I am Anne. I don't know how to use this forum or this whole site, I can't seem to understand where posting should be placed for new comers. If you could help me that would be great. Thanks

hello to u

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by anneavonlee

Hello, I am Anne. I don't know how to use this forum or this whole site, I can't seem to understand where posting should be placed for new comers. If you could help me that would be great. Thanks

Welcome.