[Scary_Jax]

The thought of having sex with someone else scares me half to death. The thought just scares me for unexplained reasons. I told my boyfriend I want to wait until marriage to have sex but secretly even then, I don't know if i want to even have sex after marriage.
My boyfriend is completely okay with it and doesn't pressure me at all. I am thankful for that. Unfortunately, I just don't know where this fear of sex came from. Any ideas?

[Rhapsody]

Secret fears are only unknown to the conscience mind... the unconscience mind (soul) knows every thing we feel, love, hate and fear.... might I suggest some counseling, if only for a short while, to help you locate the source of your fear toward sex?

May I ask? - is there any history of sexual abuse... I ask because this can create fear toward sex.

[Rmdctc]

Maybe your terrified of sex because you are not happy with your body image? Are you even comfortable with the idea of getting naked with someone else? Like Rhapsody said maybe some therapy for even a short while to explore why you feel this way would be good. I wish you luck on working through this.

[Yoda]

Might I suggest that you explore what pleasures you so that when you do have sex you will know what makes you feel good and can share that with your partner. Toys could be fun. Try different fantasies and get to know yourself.

Also you don't need to hurry to have sex. I often found it fun to kiss and get into some heavy petting and touch each other but it doesn't have to be actual sex to have fun.

Perhaps some music playing could be fun. There are some songs that I always thought would be fun to listen to while having sex.

And most important accept yourself and realize that everybody is different and what is fun for one person might not be for another.

One thing I notice is you are putting your problems onto your boyfriend and he has no idea its even happening......

Maybe a bit of honesty with him rather than let him find out after you are married ?