[hawthoerne]

My father is an M to F transsexual, and i am fine with it, in fact, i encourage him to be what he feels he is. BUT! My mother keeps convincing herself that it makes me uncomfortable. it doesn't. what can i do to convince her? (they are divorced btw)

[googley]

Hi,

I don't know if you are going to be able to convince your mom of anything. If she is uncomfortable with your father's transition then she may be projecting her uncomfortableness with the change on to you. Or she may feel that she is left out as the one who is uncomfortable and that her thinking and saying that you are uncomfortable makes her feel like she has someone on her "side". I don't know how old you were when your parents got divorced, but I know that when my parents fought and from talking to my friends that parents can try and get their children to side with them on any and every issue. Does she try to get you to agree with her against what your dad says on other issues or just this issue? I know my mom would always try to get me to side against my dad. Good luck.

[Rhapsody]

I sounds like your mother might be projecting her own fears onto you... try asking her how she feels about what dad is doing and if she says it doesn't matter pr bother her one bit just be there for her as she talks... the truth will eventually come out in her words as she shares.

[Mike_J]

Like the others said, her problems dealing with this are being projected onto you. You won't be able to change how she thinks, just let her know that you don't want to hear certain things from her.

[Rhapsody]

Originally Posted by Mike_J

just let her know that you don't want to hear certain things from her.

AMEN!! - I had to do this with my own mother and we are better off now for me having spoken up back then.

[hawthoerne]

thanks y'all

[salukigirl]

I agree that this sounds like a simple case of projection. She is probably upset that you are so okay with it and doesn't really want you to be. Give her time and hopefully she will come around.