Confused

I am happily married and satisfied with my wife. And yet I have constant fantasies of being with other women I cross paths with and I am not trying to.

I don't get it. I have no desire to be with others and yet I can't stop thinking about it.

What do you do about this?

It's one thing to think about other women or fantasize about them, but it's completely another thing to actually act on these fantasies.

You say you're happily married, but are you? Is there any possibility that something within your marriage is lacking, therefore, you are fantasizing for perhaps a sufficient reason?

If you are truely happily married, then just know that these are just fantasies, that will never become reality, because you know in your heart that (cheating) is not an option.

21

I totally agree but these thoughts are totally contradictory to reality. I really do not have any desire to be with someone else.

I have other bizarre thoughts also of other nature that are just as inexplicable.

Has anyone else experienced this?

I mean on one hand as you say I do not have any remote interest on acting upon them but I don't want the thoughts to be frank with you.

hi. perhaps you need to recognize them for what they are - just thoughts. let them pass without acting on them. easily said but not so easy to do as sexual thoughts can be pleasurable, causing one to dwell on them. meditation is a good way to learn to control your thoughts. i don't think they are trying to tell you anything other than remind you of your sexual needs. your committment to fidelity is more important that these thoughts.

Yes I agree with that and in essence that is what I do. I do appreciate you confirming my feelings in it though.

I guess I need not make a big issue of why they are present. But I don't understand why they present themselves when I do nothing to invite them?

But that just brings us back to the beginning. So maybe as you say I need to make that also something not to concern myself with.

I think to a certain extent we all have fantasies that we have no intention of acting on. At other times, it may be a possibility to talk to our partner and involve them in our fantasies.

I'm sorry you are having to make heads and tails of your thoughts and feelings. It can cause a rupture in your relationship, even if it is just temporarily (And I really know about this...!)

I appreciate everyone's thoughts.

I know to a certain extent it happens to many people. But they come and go at the strangest times also.