Im I weird??!

I have recently been having some really really really weird fantasies, I do not wish to act upon any of them so teqnicually its not a fetish right? Either way Iam very ashamed of them. I am a 16 year only lesbian I have been with m y partner (age19) over a year now, I dont know if i should tell her or not?

You're right. Fantasies don't become fetishes unless you act on them. Try not to be ashamed. We all have strange fantasies and/or fetishes - they are completely normal. I would hope that your partner would understand that your fantasies are just fantasies. I am always in support of being honest - it is always the best policy. I am curious to know what these fantasies are - maybe I could help a little better, but I understand not wanting to go there.

If this is a recent thing and you don't intend, as you say, to act on them, then maybe don't think of being too hasty. It is possible they might subside after a while and things will calm down, then there might be no need to mention them at all. If you really feel you need to tell her or that they aren't going away and you have the kind of relationship where you discuss these things, then I guess the choice is indeed yours. On the whole though, if it's not something that is hurting her or needs to be said, then there is no real reason why they can't stay in the privacy of your own head if that's what you decide you want.

Fantasies are like dreams - we don't have much control over them.

Are you ashamed of your deams?

I wish you had mentioned what some of these fantasies were, for context. Most fetishes are harmless, until you depend on them exclusively for sexual fulfillment. Take the example of the (very common) foot fetish. By itself, it's harmless, it just means that feet would be very erotic to you, and can easily be incorporated into your sexual activities. I was with a foot fetishist for a long time, and for me it felt amazing to have my feet stroked, licked, rubbed, etc. while my partner worshipped them.

Fetishes only become harmful when it becomes the only thing you can do to get off. If my partner had stuck to worshipping my feet to the exclusion of any other sexual activity, I would have been very unsatisfied indeed!

There are some fetishes that can be harmful by their very nature. Necrophilia, for example, because you can't get consent from the dead. Bestiality and pedophilia are harmful by the same argument.

If your fantasies are kinky in nature, involve pain or humiliation or control and power imbalances between you and your partner, perhaps you should research into BDSM practices. BDSM is a safer way to explore darker fantasies in a consensual way, that provides boundaries and safeties to ensure that no harm is being done. BDSM can be incorporated into sexual activity, or explored without sex. Just do your research carefully, with a focus on how to keep it safe. And always use a safeword so you or your partner needs to communicate that things are getting unsafe.

You're not weird at all, it's harmless to have fantasies or fetishes. I have a foot fetish and it's all good. The important thing is be open and honest about with your partner no matter how weird you think it is. Be yourself and have fun!