[PammyBlue]

My husband loves to give me oral sex. I enjoy it up to a point, but he won't stop! He actually enjoys it more than I do, I get bored and tired of it and have to pull away in order for him to stop. I end up being sore down there. He thinks I love it and he's being a great lover and I don't want to hurt his feelings by telling him the way I feel. Five minutes is okay, an hour is toooo much.

[mgran]

If you explain to him that too much makes you sore then he shouldn't be too hurt. It sounds like he really wants to please you, so honesty is the best policy. Let him know that there can be too much of a good thing.

[violetmoons]

Say,"Wow I hurt a little today" (there). "I think maybe too much of ____." Or change the words.Say "I think I just get tender after...____.But I bet we could ____instead."??

[salukigirl]

My bf loves to do it but I don't like receiving. I just tell him no. He gives me the pouty face and sometimes I'll let him but it just doesn't do anything for me. Makes me raw and then I can't enjoy sex afterwards. I have bled before from just going too long. Luckily he is very conscientious of how I'm feeling during and stops if he notices I'm just not into it. I hope your husband listens because it just makes it not fun after a while! But also, try and take it as a compliment. He is soooo into you! But yes, I would definitely tell him your feelings on it.

[PammyBlue]

Originally Posted by salukigirl

My bf loves to do it but I don't like receiving. I just tell him no. He gives me the pouty face and sometimes I'll let him but it just doesn't do anything for me. Makes me raw and then I can't enjoy sex afterwards. I have bled before from just going too long. Luckily he is very conscientious of how I'm feeling during and stops if he notices I'm just not into it. I hope your husband listens because it just makes it not fun after a while! But also, try and take it as a compliment. He is soooo into you! But yes, I would definitely tell him your feelings on it.

I do enjoy it for awhile, he has this rough beard that feels really good but after awhile it rubs me raw. I have told him that I'm sore afterward but he thinks that's a good thing, means he did his job. I know it's because he loves me and only wants to please me so I'm going to tread lightly when I talk to him about it. I do have some good orgasms but by the time he's done, I just want to roll over and go to sleep, I'm worn out! Thanks for writing!

[Yoda]

I liked it before sex but after I was way too sensitive and it was too much stimulation. No way I could endure an hour. Guys don't really understand. Have you tried saying tonight why don't we --- rather than just saying I don't like ---. Let him know what you would enjoy. Good luck.

[salukigirl]

Yoda - AFTER?? Icky! I can't imagine a guy wanting to go down AFTER his own genitals have been there! Just like I would never give oral after sex. All I would be thinking about is "I'm basically giving myself oral right now".

[Martina]

I feel for you....yet at the same time I'm a bit jealous. My husband doesn't like to give me oral, and that's basically the only way I ever orgasm.

[SmackytheFrog]

((Martina & PammyBlue))

Martina have you ever suggested flavoured lube? I'm not trying to make any assumptions or anything of couse, but sometimes the additional flare of the idea helps.

...if you all haven't guessed by how much I post in this forums I would love to be a sexologist! Hehe

[Perna]

I would try going on the "offensive" more so you are pleasuring him before he can pleasure you and wear out some of his energy? I would just tell him his beard makes a long time a bit rough; put the problem on the beard instead of "him"? My husband understands about the hair thing; he's clean shaven but when he decides not to shave for a day or two, asks if it's okay to kiss me

[lynn P.]

I think you should be straight forward and explain that 'more isn't better'. There's an actual medical reason to back this up - the clitoris is a very sensitive area - a little stimulation packs more punch than too long or too rough. Once it's been stimulated sufficiently, it actually becomes uncomfortable and a turn off. Maybe for a guy, longer is better but not for a woman and you should explain this difference to him. Explain there's a medical reason for it.

In addition you both need to improve your communication. This is your body and you should be able to be comfortable enough with him to say stop, it's too sensitive and he should abide by this. If you're laying there for an hour and not enjoying it, then there's an obvious miscommunication.

[bighands]

Originally Posted by salukigirl

Yoda - AFTER?? Icky! I can't imagine a guy wanting to go down AFTER his own genitals have been there! Just like I would never give oral after sex. All I would be thinking about is "I'm basically giving myself oral right now".

Seriously? If most of us could go down on ourselves, we'd never leave the house!

[Helpmegetbetter]

Originally Posted by bighands

Seriously? If most of us could go down on ourselves, we'd never leave the house!

Preach it, big!

[Helpmegetbetter]

But I know your pain.
My partner really enjoys going down on me but sometimes, he can get a bit.. enthusiastic and it can leave me too sore for anything else. Just tell him how it makes you feel in a way that he won't take personally.

[Nickcaeb]

I also love to give oral sex especially if the woman has a nice body and has a great orgasm. It’s a real turn on. Occasionally, I date women who don’t have an orgasm and about ten minutes is all they can take - they get bored and they just say “I want you in me” or something like that. To me, it’s no big deal and I gladly change modes. Your husband may be trying to make you have an orgasm. Maybe he thinks this is the only way you climax. He’s trying to please you.