[hamster-bamster]

I've never understood what it meant but now I am afraid I need to learn and do so quickly.

I kept hearing about it but never had any clue as to what it is. I was always at the ready for sex. Any time. Always lubricated naturally. Just fine. One very small exception that only underscored the general rule: when I was pregnant with my second child and having a bit of a rough time with morning sickness in the first trimester, I did not want to have sex with my now ex second husband. I was too shy to tell him that and I felt that something deeply abnormal was going on with me, so I just tolerated sex which I did not want to. It was just for a few occasions and then the situation resolved itself. I told him about it many many years later and he was sorry that he essentially put me through non-consensual sex. Again, this was a minor exception.

With masturbation, same thing - always ready, whenever there was an opportunity. Nothing obsessive or at the expense of other productive activities, but just, well, any time. Especially at night. Every night, if I was alone. Or in the morning shower, every morning. I was always ready for it, without any special requirements.

Then two things happened: my second husband and I separated and I started to live alone and my then p-doc started me on Risperdal, an antipsychotic. Risperdal killed my sexuality 100%. I could not understand why kissing couples I saw in public transit were doing what they were doing. I basically became an asexual person. But I did not complain to p-docs. Then, I developed Parkinson-like features (I could barely walk) on Risperdal and got switched to another AP, Geodon. With Geodon, a bit of sexuality returned in the form of an occasional erotic dream featuring something from my past, perhaps every 3 months, but no more than that. Several years later, I started on a low dose of Prozac and immediately regained sexual drive, which is a paradoxical and lucky reaction to Prozac, but remained unorgasmic. By that time I was able to bring up the issue with the new p-doc. To make the long story short, he told me to taper off Geodon and at half the dose orgasms came back... in the form of masturbation for now, which is OK... but only for a few days. Now - no more and I am completely dry, no lubrication whatsoever. P-doc says that it might be anxiety and advised me to just keep taking the lower dose of Geodon and wait and see. I will - I will just not touch myself down there at all.

But I am thinking that what if it not the medication - what if I have changed as a person and now need to be "in the mood"? Can such a deep change happen to a person? If you need to be "in the mood", what does it entail specifically? Is it affinity to your partner, a special fantasy, a time in the lunar cycle? I am at my wit's end. Things used to be so simple, but not anymore...

[Harley47]

Hmm...this one is tricky. I'll do what I can to help. Keep in mind, aside from what you've told me and what I very vaguely know about what medicines can do to a sex drive, I am going purely off what I know, which may or may not be helpful.

I'm 19, so "the mood" is basically what you described in the beginning of your post...anytime, night particularly. There are times though that it's more intense...if something triggers a fantasy (such as a scene in a movie, which I'll return to) or some such, the "mood" strengthens into straight "horny," if I may be so blunt.

Speaking for me personally though, the thought idea of being with a partner, like say a wife or fiance or whathaveyou is a huge...I suppose trigger. I'm not at the point in my life where I'm actively seeking either, as I have a lot of groundwork to cover before that's a feasible reality (I will finish my schooling in its entirety before and become financially stable before I marry anyone, period). Going back to what I mentioned about movies, those rare sweet scenes between obviously loving couples put me in the magical "mood," regardless to explicitness. I'll also confess to a rather high degree of envy, but that's a whole 'nother can of worms entirely, and neither here nor there. Just figured to include it since it's a package deal.

As far as you go, as I realize my personal experiences might not be applicable, I would try to wait a bit...your doctor might be right, and it might just be your body readjusting to the medicine change. If it doesn't clear up within the given time frame, I'd bring it up again to your doctor, stressing that this is an important thing for you, and you do not wish to lose it.

I hope I was of some help. I wish my advice to you could be less vague and less "me" centered, but unfortunately, that is the best I have. I wish you all the best, and I hope you will be able to get this resolved.

My very best,
Harley

[hamster-bamster]

Thank you! Do folks things that it can be age? From what I have been reading, women come more often and with more ease as they age, so I doubt... I guess I should listen to the doctor and just wait and see...

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

I've never understood what it meant but now I am afraid I need to learn and do so quickly.

I kept hearing about it but never had any clue as to what it is. I was always at the ready for sex. Any time. Always lubricated naturally. Just fine. One very small exception that only underscored the general rule: when I was pregnant with my second child and having a bit of a rough time with morning sickness in the first trimester, I did not want to have sex with my now ex second husband. I was too shy to tell him that and I felt that something deeply abnormal was going on with me, so I just tolerated sex which I did not want to. It was just for a few occasions and then the situation resolved itself. I told him about it many many years later and he was sorry that he essentially put me through non-consensual sex. Again, this was a minor exception.

With masturbation, same thing - always ready, whenever there was an opportunity. Nothing obsessive or at the expense of other productive activities, but just, well, any time. Especially at night. Every night, if I was alone. Or in the morning shower, every morning. I was always ready for it, without any special requirements.

Then two things happened: my second husband and I separated and I started to live alone and my then p-doc started me on Risperdal, an antipsychotic. Risperdal killed my sexuality 100%. I could not understand why kissing couples I saw in public transit were doing what they were doing. I basically became an asexual person. But I did not complain to p-docs. Then, I developed Parkinson-like features (I could barely walk) on Risperdal and got switched to another AP, Geodon. With Geodon, a bit of sexuality returned in the form of an occasional erotic dream featuring something from my past, perhaps every 3 months, but no more than that. Several years later, I started on a low dose of Prozac and immediately regained sexual drive, which is a paradoxical and lucky reaction to Prozac, but remained unorgasmic. By that time I was able to bring up the issue with the new p-doc. To make the long story short, he told me to taper off Geodon and at half the dose orgasms came back... in the form of masturbation for now, which is OK... but only for a few days. Now - no more and I am completely dry, no lubrication whatsoever. P-doc says that it might be anxiety and advised me to just keep taking the lower dose of Geodon and wait and see. I will - I will just not touch myself down there at all.

But I am thinking that what if it not the medication - what if I have changed as a person and now need to be "in the mood"? Can such a deep change happen to a person? If you need to be "in the mood", what does it entail specifically? Is it affinity to your partner, a special fantasy, a time in the lunar cycle? I am at my wit's end. Things used to be so simple, but not anymore...

there are physical body sensations that a person has when they are "in the mood" another term for in the mood for sex around here where I live and work is "horny" "excited" "randy".

in general a person who is in the mood for sex will be "wetter" (females) down below, guys get an erection, some people flush sort of like going red of embarrassment. A person starts paying more attention to others of their sexual preferences. Some people sweat, sometimes the mouth waters.

my own clues are being/ becoming wetter down below, my heart races and I get a light red flush, and my eyes zero in on my wifes features and attributes.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

Thank you! Do folks things that it can be age? From what I have been reading, women come more often and with more ease as they age, so I doubt... I guess I should listen to the doctor and just wait and see...

Ive heard the opposite from people I know of the older generation.. that as a woman ages and enters menopause they lose some interest in sex and focus more on a persons personality/ how another person makes them feel mentally. that as a woman ages their reproductive system doesnt exactly work the way it should (having unpredictable period, varying severity of flow, pain,) once they hit their peri menopausal yr-yrs their clitoris though it is still sensitive it reverts to a pre puberty location and sometimes in size, because the woman isnt ovulating anymore theres less fluidity so a woman may feel like she likes someone the wetness isnt there as much or as often, which is why some older women need lubercant. because its been pretty prevailent/documented that the older you get and once in the older generation theres a loss of interest in sex and sometimes the ability to have/ to enjoy/ perform there are meds like viagra for men and theres now research going on for a "viagra" type medication for women.

[Big Mama]

Oh I hope your correct about the age thing. You mean as I get closer to 40 my sex drive will take a turn for the better. Oh think God. My meds make my sex drive almost non existant. But thinking back to the good ole days, To say your not in the mood and it have nothing to do w/ meds would be odd.

Besides medications to not be in the mood could be due to stress, illness, Do you ever have a cold and just feel yuck and think no sex please. It could be due to relationship issues. Hurt feelings, anger, sadness. I have these issues and that adds to my "NOT IN THE MOOD" So it may not be all the meds fought. It might be partially the situations fought.

Of course to be in the mood, well horney pretty much explains it. Or overly interested at the least. Hope this helps.

[hamster-bamster]

So it was a simple yeast infection that resolved without treatment. I am fine now, as before, pretty much do not need to be in the mood. It took me so long to realize it was a yeast infection because I had not had one for a few years. Surely a yeast infection interferes with that kind of play.

[sallyjoseph]

Drugs can affect the erotic feelings one has. After 40, one can loose sex drive. Do not be susceptible to drugs to alter your sex life else it will cause havoc.