Straight men wearing lingerie only during sex

I'm confused, anyone understand straight men who like to wear lingerie , shoes when masturbating or during sex, the cross dressing seemed to start when he was 10

I can't say I truly understand, but I do know of guys that enjoy it. They say they like the feel of lingerie and stuff. The soft, satiny feeling. It's not that uncommon.

Hmm .. an odd thought just crossed my mind. If a man wears a woman's shoes it's cross-dressing, but if a woman runs around with her husband's shirt on it isn't. I don't get it ...

Double standards.

Maybe he watched Rocky Horror one too many times.

I think it simply means that he's comfortable with his sexuality much like women who wear corsets and lingerie, it just feels sexy.

And honestly, I find that very attractive in a straight man!

Judging from your other posts, it seems that you're having trouble understanding and accepting your partner's crossdressing. Have you talked with him much about it? Sincerely and non-judgmentally asked your questions?

Googling will turn up a lot of information on this subject. A lot of men who cross-dress don't even know why they like to do it. Some men just like feel of lingerie. Some men want to get in touch with a feminine side. Some men may have gone from being aroused by looking at women in lingerie to fetishizing the lingerie itself. Some submissive men enjoy being humiliated (forced cross-dressing being a practice in this case). The list goes on and on.

Yup, I like dressing up for sex. There's really nothing to understand, nothing to explain. I just like it and it feels right.

Can anyone help me understand why that should be a problem?

Hi Lynn, I used to chat to a cross dresser online. I'm a straight female but it opened my mind...he said it makes him feel closer to the woman, to understand how women feel too, and even sometimes in a mother/son way. I suppose it's always nice when we know some men are in touch with their feminine side, even if it's in a different way to what we perceive as 'normal'. Whoever you know that is like this is no less of a man, and maybe even more of one??!!

OP never said that it SHOULD be a problem. I can't speak for her, but for me it would be a problem due to my fairly narrow range of acceptable virility. I do however have a guy friend who wears patent leather pumps to work. He is adorable. Nice, intelligent, you name it. I can't picture having sex with him, though. It is not only due to his being outside of my range of acceptable virility, but, even more so, it would be too funny

If a guy wants to dress in women's clothes and underwear then that's his life, his decision. But likewise, the OP doesn't have to be accepting of it and shouldn't be made to feel in the wrong just because that's how she feels about the situation.

Dude, this has been something I've wondered for a long time:

5 Girly Things Guys Really Like

It's so true though. My t-shirts are stiff, rough and uncomfortable. On the other hand, my wife's t-shirts are soft and ... well, that's all I know. I can barely keep her from wearing all my clothes, much less ever put on one of her t-shirts. (She's even stolen my socks and underwear! Bet my boxers didn't fit quite right in the front )

So yeah, while I wouldn't wear lingerie, I can see where guys come from ... and I can see where women would think it's weird ... even though she's wearing your boxers while thinking it's weird.

Here's an article which may help you to understand this :

**insidelowselfesteem.blogspot.co.uk/2014/03/sissies-and-sissy-porn-understood.html**

Yuck! That article is not at all supportive.
I don't buy the "low self esteem" line.

There's a huge gap between "likes to wear women's lingerie" and "identifies as a sissy, is into humiliation," etc.

I used to have a lingerie fetish when I was younger but I slowly grew out of it.

because T-shirts are what is called unisex. They are not masculine, but unisex. Socks are unisex, too. Feminine lingerie is not unisex. It is asymmetrical. It is the same with handbags - some handbags are purely for women, but others (those big briefcases that female and male lawyers alike carry) are unisex. Asymmetrical.

Would you please say "play humiliation" rather than "humiliation" in your posts from now on? Just four more letters, but the difference is night and day.

There are people who are humiliated against their will, and the word "humiliation" is reserved to describe their experiences, and only their experiences. If a "sissy" or whoever wants "humiliation", it is not real humiliation, but play humiliation, or pretend humiliation. I do not insist on my word choice, but there should be some word choice you are comfortable with that sets the experiences of "sissies" or whoever those people are apart from the experiences of people who are humiliated without asking for it. It is simply deeply disrespectful towards people who are humiliated for real, and not for play, to treat humiliation as non-chalanantly as you did in your post. One cannot be "into humiliation", that I can tell you for sure. So please watch what you say.

You say "unisex", but in fact, women have usurped all the accessories that used to be exclusively male. Once women started wearing argyle, men were left with no way to express their masculinity in clothes.

Maybe I'm going too far, but it does look like there is "unisex" and "female" clothing and nothing left for men.

PS: Incidentally, this can be tough on women too. There is no way a woman can cross-dress!

Well we don't express our masculinity by dressing up like a woman. Lingerie is designed for women to show of a woman's curves.

Then again, anything to do with being masculine is looked down upon. Men are being told we have to be more in touch with "our emotions" and less stoic as an example.

I have to disagree.

Just look at the fit and cut of my wife's T-shirts compared to mine. Hers are narrow in the waist while mine are cut more V-shaped with longer sleeves and broader shoulders. There are definitely men's and women's t-shirts. Socks are the same way, there are definite differences between her socks and mine. Underwear? Woo! Talk about differences, nothing unisex there. My wife's football jerseys are the same way, mine is cut for putting pads under it, hers is narrow at the waist with slim shoulders (although she still wears her red and gold, not pink).

Here's a woman's jersey (and a good one at that )


And here's a men's:


Notice the significant difference in the way they're cut?

It's just that it's okay for a woman to throw on a big frumpy football jersey and a pair of boxers and be comfy on the couch, but if a man grabs a soft narrow t-shirt and slim panties he's cross-dressing. The truth is that it's a double standard (and one of the few that work in women's favor).

I just find it curious.

I think you're correct Lycanthrope. You're mentioning the emotions opens a huge can of worms. Men are being expected to be both strong and emotionless, but caring and crying with the ability to change and adapt depending on the mood and situation around them. The expectations that are being placed on men these days are furthering to confuse them in their place in society and their roles in everything from work to relationships to parenting.

In a situation where the man likes wearing women's things, and his partner isn't accepting neither party is "wrong". But it does leave a conflict, either the man has to stop (or more likely hide) something harmless that he finds enjoyable, or the woman has to tolerate something she doesn't approve of.

No perfect answer to this situation.

It seems that my post has triggered you, and I'm sorry for that. The language I used is quite standard in the BDSM community, and the proclivity quite common, thus what seemed like non-chalance to you. I would be happy to use the term "(consensual) humiliation" here, as this would set it apart from what you are talking about.

That's because the feminists want to emasculate men. Not crying and being stoic - we're told we're holding in our emotions and need to open up. Wanting to protect women and children - we're told it's patronising and degrading to the woman and she can look after herself and doesn't need some man thinking he can own her and she's his property. Enjoying looking at beautiful women- - we're accused of being perverts and objectifying women.

Basically acting like man, you're accused of living up to man made gender stereotypes. Man are being taught to act like women and women are being taught to act more masculine. Does anyone here honestly think the metrosexuals and the nice guys would have survived taking on sabre toothed tigers?

BUT THE PATRIARCHY... I actually saw something that a feminist wrote saying that she feels bad that men aren't allowed to express themselves and then proceeded to say that "but other men did this to men. The patriarchy is oppressing men too" ... ... ... get that **** out of here. I really don't understand that mindset. It's a societal problem. Not a man vs woman problem. And people can say that it was an extremist feminist who said that, but when you join a group and adopt a label, your individuality is gone.

Personally, I see this as the same thing as a woman deciding not to shave her legs or armpits. She has every right to make that decision and at the same time, no one is obligated to find it attractive. A man can dress up for sex if he pleases and a woman (or man) can find it unattractive if she does. It's just a matter of finding a compromise or finding someone else you are more sexually compatible with. I mean, if this is something he REALLY wants to do and it is something you REALLY want him to not do and both of you feel like you can't come to a compromise, then that is a valid reason to redefine the relationship. It isn't a matter of dumping him because he is into cross dressing. It's a matter of being sexually compatible.

Also, trying to understand someone else's fetish is very difficult to do. Someone can try to explain to me why someone might be into idk poop or something and I can listen to why someone might find that sexy and I can respect that their brain is wired to find that hot, but no amount of understanding is ever going to make poop play anything I want to explore or be okay with a boyfriend who insists on having it within our sex life. I'm just not into it and will not partake in it. Ever. Am I close minded for that? Nope.

I don't think there's really a group of women that consciously want to emasculate men. Like Growlything, I think it's more of a societal thing.