new "need" for masturbation

i am 40+ year old male- Married- kids- Lately the sex life has not been that good- I masturbate 3-4 times a week and have no issues but it seems I have a strong need to be "viewed" or watched while doing it. (my wife wont)- it can be a complete stranger but it heightens the arousal and erection so much more- I was chatting with a friend on line and I was so turned on by the thought of someone "catching" me in the act- Is this normal and what do I make of it?

I can tell you that you are not alone. While this has never happened to me when I was on OKC, some of my internet contacts - women - complained that they were propositioned with "wanna watch me jerk off on Skype? "

Why is your wife so against watching?

Have you tried videotaping? Might be fun.

At any rate, people are social animals and want company.

Lots of married people masturbate, so its really nothing new.

I think the newness refered to wanting to be watched and not masturbating per se.

"Normal" isn't a word that should be used in discussions about sexuality. In fact, we really don't know what "normal" sexuality is. While we may have seen a few, very few, friends or acquaintances masturbating, it's certainly uncommon, at least in my experience. Of the thousands of people I have met in my lifetime, if only briefly, I can think of only four or five occasions when I witnessed another male masturbating (a few occasions when I was in elementary school, and twice in boot camp). Since then, nada.

In short, of the scores of people we encounter every day of our lives, we have little to no idea of their sexuality beyond outward signals in their dress and speech. Most people do masturbate. My wife told me a couple of days ago that she had masturbated when I was gone for a doctor's appointment. I masturbate at least once a week, sometime two or three times, and I'm 71!

So, yes, it's normal. It has nothing to do with morality. Period.

Other

Nothing wrong with it! Its normal and healthy. I was told and I dont know if its true, that if a man masturbates before sex he will last longer. Maybe you guys can educated me on this. Could be a myth.

I used to feel like a failure when hubby masturbated in the shower and yes I have seen him do it but never commented on it. As I have gotten older and my married has matured Im fine with it.

Women do it too.... Its healthy!!!

Buzz Bee said, "I was told and I dont know if its true, that if a man masturbates before sex he will last longer. Maybe you guys can educated me on this. Could be a myth."

I have learned the hard way (no pun intended) that if I masturbate even a day before a date with my wife, I may have trouble reaching orgasm. So, I try to not play with myself, at least to the point of inevitable orgasm, unless I know that I'll have a couple of days to "recover". That said, even if I can't reach orgasm it's not a problem, because my wife and I haven't had intercourse for several years. For whatever reasons, penetration was physically uncomfortable for both of us, and never resulted in orgasm for my wife. We have, however, found very acceptable ways to turn each other on and to reach orgasm, sometimes mutually.

If we required penetration to orgasm, it could be a problem: As I've gotten older — I'm now 71 — I have little trouble getting an erection, but maintaining it for long is problematic.

Other