[emmaleewhispers]

My girlfriend and I don't seem to be "on the same page" lately. We have issues with communication because I deaf and she hears normally... I have hearing aids but my hearing is pretty rapidly deteriorating and they don't help much anymore. I do not know sign language; I can only depend on residual hearing and lipreading to communicate and often that is not enough. So, understandably, she gets frustrated. So do I. However, she's not very patient or understanding and it kills me because I love her incredibly. She almost always acts annoyed when I ask her to repeat herself. Don't get me wrong - I am sure that she loves me. She's admitted to me that she is new to dealing with someone who is almost completely deaf and I feel I need to be patient with her. However, sometimes I avoid asking her to repeat herself when I need her to, just pretending that I hear her, and other times I avoid talking altogether. I feel like I am walking on eggshells for the fear that she might blow up out of impatience with me. I know this is not healthy and I need to figure out how to deal with this. I have tried talking to her and it usually turns into an argument with her thinking she's doing nothing wrong. Any thoughts?

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[unaluna]

I thought all young couples these days just texted...!

[emmaleewhispers]

Originally Posted by hankster

I thought all young couples these days just texted...!

Excuse me... I am not exactly young. I am nearly 32 and my partner is near 40. Please check your facts before accusing someone of being something they're not.

And, texting is vital for me, as I am deaf. Not all who text are "young people".

[unaluna]

Sorry.

But youve turned this into an argument and i feel like ive done nothing wrong, which is the original problem you wrote in about. I dont think its about decibels.

[celtic.starlite]

Originally Posted by hankster

Sorry.

But youve turned this into an argument and i feel like ive done nothing wrong, which is the original problem you wrote in about. I dont think its about decibels.

Hankster,

Your original comment:

I thought all young couples these days just texted...!

comes off as harsh, stereotyping, and judgmental. I do not know if you meant for it to or not, but that's the problem with text (whether on a phone or on a computer).

Not all young couples text. I'm in my late 20s. When I'm in a relationship I prefer not to text, for this reason, too many ways to create an argument that was never there to begin with. The reader decides how she thinks the texter's tone was and if they were truly mad or not. I actually did not really start texting with anyone until about 3 years ago.

As Emmalee mentioned, she is deaf, so she relies on texting and writing as forms of communication. Unfortunately, Emmalee, you're partner is going to need to learn to work with you and you with her. I'm sorry, Emmalee, that I do not have much advice today.

I wanted to share that we all need to be careful with the way we choose to write/type what we want to say, and in return we need to be aware that how we interpret something somebody wrote/texted does not mean that's exactly how they meant it.

Celtic

[emmaleewhispers]

Originally Posted by celtic.starlite

Hankster,

Your original comment:

comes off as harsh, stereotyping, and judgmental. I do not know if you meant for it to or not, but that's the problem with text (whether on a phone or on a computer).

Not all young couples text. I'm in my late 20s. When I'm in a relationship I prefer not to text, for this reason, too many ways to create an argument that was never there to begin with. The reader decides how she thinks the texter's tone was and if they were truly mad or not. I actually did not really start texting with anyone until about 3 years ago.

As Emmalee mentioned, she is deaf, so she relies on texting and writing as forms of communication. Unfortunately, Emmalee, you're partner is going to need to learn to work with you and you with her. I'm sorry, Emmalee, that I do not have much advice today.

I wanted to share that we all need to be careful with the way we choose to write/type what we want to say, and in return we need to be aware that how we interpret something somebody wrote/texted does not mean that's exactly how they meant it.

Celtic

Thanks Celtic for sharing your viewpoint. I appreciate it.

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Emma, I hope that things work out for you and your girlfriend. Please communicate with her that you are having issues and please tell her that you are trying to be patient with her and that you think that she is trying to do the same with you. Also I would, if you are able to look at getting some new hearing aids; I know they are expensive, but hearing is part of communication. I have a slight hearing loss myself and often require reading lips to hear everything.
You look like you have a lot to offer and your partner sounds like she is there for you, so push through. Maybe you can learn some sign together, deepen your relationship.

[Shaly78]

If you all love each other then it will become important to do whatever is needd to make communication easier. If that isn't possible, then right now you have to communicate the best you can.