Kink/Fetish

Sep 26, 2013, 01:11 PM

I think having fetishes and engaging in a kinky lifestyle can certainly help those with mental health issues. The feeling of escapism and freedom helps clear my mind I am certain. I'm not that crazy sexually, but yea sometimes it can be good to go a little wild. Anyone else agree?

ocdwifeofsociopath · Sep 26, 2013, 03:12 PM

I do, but to a degree. I firmly believe in all things in moderation. Some things can get out of hand...

LiteraryLark · Sep 26, 2013, 04:33 PM

Sure, it can be helpful. Unless you have a fetish like mine that offends everybody.

Sep 26, 2013, 05:31 PM

Ah Dr.. I don't mind yours.

Tightslife · Nov 01, 2013, 12:55 PM

yeah i have pantyhose tights fetish obviously

Patagonia · Nov 02, 2013, 02:50 PM

Yes I do agree. A few yrs ago I would've said no. Funny how are thinking changes. I just need to find someone to fulfill my kink

growlycat · Nov 03, 2013, 03:10 AM

Ditto on needing to find a kink-friendly partner who is also discrete!!!!
Men seem to be more exhibitionist about this stuff, I am so not that at all.

There is always the danger of an angry ex retaliating by telling everyone your secret.
Hello, closet!!! Here I stay!

Patagonia · Nov 04, 2013, 12:07 AM

Luckily there's lots of porn to watch & I can see everyone else enjoy their kink.

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undesig · Nov 23, 2013, 07:06 PM

Have to agree with the closet thing.

Patagonia · Nov 24, 2013, 10:35 PM

There's just too many variables when it comes to trying to find someone to fulfill my kink. Is that enjoyment worth the possible pain it can lead to of exposure?
Need to come back from la la land.

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AngstyLady · Nov 25, 2013, 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DylanP

I think having fetishes and engaging in a kinky lifestyle can certainly help those with mental health issues. The feeling of escapism and freedom helps clear my mind I am certain. I'm not that crazy sexually, but yea sometimes it can be good to go a little wild. Anyone else agree?

Yep I think a certain amount of kink is healthy.

Angel of Bedlam · Nov 26, 2013, 07:29 PM

I don't agree personally. Kinky sex where I was dominated and degraded only reminded me of being molested and made me feel that sex was all I had to offer to a man. I think this may vary for people, but that's how it felt for me.

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oceanwater7 · Nov 29, 2013, 04:15 AM

Yes of course it must help. I have very intense emotions and pouring them out in an orgasm just makes me feel more calm.

Patagonia · Nov 29, 2013, 09:12 PM

I understand Angel's point of view but when it comes to my kink/fetish I feel like I have that control back which i lost to an abuser. I play the game, make the rules & say when it's time to quit. I love that controlling feeling. It brings me power & endurance.
Some day I'm going to use them.

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vans1974 · Nov 30, 2013, 01:01 PM

I agree with ocdwife-all things in moderation!!

Angel of Bedlam · Nov 30, 2013, 02:37 PM

Here's a question: Does anyone just prefer love making, sans kink? I don't mean boring, maybe more vanilla though. But love making full of kisses and being close? That's what I prefer, maybe because it's something I've never had and it just makes me feel so valued.

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vans1974 · Nov 30, 2013, 02:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angel of Bedlam

Here's a question: Does anyone just prefer love making, sans kink? I don't mean boring, maybe more vanilla though. But love making full of kisses and being close? That's what I prefer, maybe because it's something I've never had and it just makes me feel so valued.

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I'd say it depends on my mood...sometimes I prefer to make love, other times I just want to have crazy, wild sex!!

Angel of Bedlam · Nov 30, 2013, 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vans1974

I'd say it depends on my mood...sometimes I prefer to make love, other times I just want to have crazy, wild sex!!

I guess the only kink left in me after my ex is that I want to make love to my boyfriend on his work desk. Other than that, I will stick to love making.

Just to clarify, I don't mean that the sex has to be slow and soft. My boyfriend and I get more aggressive during our love-making and get going harder and deeper- it is not boring. Just not necessarily kinky.

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vans1974 · Nov 30, 2013, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angel of Bedlam

I guess the only kink left in me after my ex is that I want to make love to my boyfriend on his work desk. Other than that, I will stick to love making.

Just to clarify, I don't mean that the sex has to be slow and soft. My boyfriend and I get more aggressive during our love-making and get going harder and deeper- it is not boring. Just not necessarily kinky.

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Hey Angel- I hear you...is there such a thing as slow and soft sex?? JK Ya, I totally agree with you, making love has to be aggressive, and hard and deep!!

Patagonia · Nov 30, 2013, 07:16 PM

I personally don't see a difference between "kink sex", "making love", "screwing", "stock pot sex-low & slow" etc. it's all intercourse. I can't judge the difference as long as it's enjoyable

The flavor of the evening depends on my mood & H mood too. It's got to match.

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Angel of Bedlam · Nov 30, 2013, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Patagonia

I personally don't see a difference between "kink sex", "making love", "screwing", "stock pot sex-low & slow" etc. it's all intercourse. I can't judge the difference as long as it's enjoyable

The flavor of the evening depends on my mood & H mood too. It's got to match.

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I guess for me I've made the distinction between f****** and making love because to me, the first of the two implies for me that there is no emotional connection whatsoever. It's almost as if we are using each other to satisfy a physical urge and that's it. The second for me implies that there is an emotional connection and there is something deeper and more meaningful than just satisfying those physical needs. I obviously prefer the latter of the two.

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Dec 01, 2013, 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DylanP

I think having fetishes and engaging in a kinky lifestyle can certainly help those with mental health issues. The feeling of escapism and freedom helps clear my mind I am certain. I'm not that crazy sexually, but yea sometimes it can be good to go a little wild. Anyone else agree?

Most definitely.

Onyx999 · Dec 01, 2013, 06:12 PM

A subject close to my floggeruh eruhm heart.

I've been in the lifestyle for a few years
I now require my partners to be kink-aware. I'm a sadomasochistic switch. I'm Always in control even when I bottom. My mental health takes a dive when there's no kink. I haven't had a good beating or good sex in months.

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Poppy Princess · Dec 01, 2013, 08:05 PM

Vanilla sex is my fetish.

Patagonia · Dec 01, 2013, 09:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Onyx999

A subject close to my floggeruh eruhm heart.

I've been in the lifestyle for a few years
I now require my partners to be kink-aware. I'm a sadomasochistic switch. I'm Always in control even when I bottom. My mental health takes a dive when there's no kink. I haven't had a good beating or good sex in months.

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Again the issue of having that control can make a huge difference. Control to me equals power.

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