sexual feelings for anyone

Hi there
Just wondering what it means, when, all my teen/adult life, i have started to have sexual feelings/fantasies about people who pay me attention. This applies especially to those who i perceive as more powerful eg at work. I have been attracted to both men and women.I also feel the inevitable hurt v. much when they reject me or seem to
These feelings are a massive distraction from my life.I am in a straight long term relatnship with children, but have many fantasies/attractions which do cause quite alot of pain.
Ho hum

I think many people equate sex with love and acceptance and caring. so you see these powerful people and you want that approval from that, want that acceptance from them, so you are naturally attracted to them and confuse those feelings with sex. just my theory.

Hi kaliope
i think that's partly true, but i do misread cues from people, as a sign they are attracted to me, sexually. I have been doing this for many years, and it's led to alot of rejection feelings.
Equating attention, being nice with sexual attraction isn't healthy and leads to the inevitable reality check, particularly when i get a bit obsessed with them.

I have this too, but I figured, it's all in your head. You haven't done really anything yet to show that those feelings from them being conveyed on you exist till you make it happen. I'm not saying go and hit on them or try to act like you're the **** and go all out impressing them. It's unprofessional in a work environment, if the conversation strikes up form a connection a bond a friendship, let those first few moments of what they are showing how they think and feel about things. Then you judge if the attraction is worth being around them or not, if you like them go see how you can form a connection. If they come off as rude, don't bother with them especially if they ignore you first, it's better that you keep yourself in check of how the situation really is and what's is in your head.

I find it helpful is to talk to them, learn who they are. Then you'll learn very quickly if you want to be around this person, I'm a very picky person and many people just either piss me off or they don't seem that interesting all together.

It sucks, because the guy could be a abercrombie and fitch model/the girl could be however attractive you give and take for your own attraction, but when they open their mouth. It's a huge turn off when you find out how you really don't want to be around this person.

Oh I forgot to add, you like people who are paying attention to you, and you take it as a sexual pursuit. It can be confused with flirting, but it's really educating yourself on what they want to say. If it's a girl, even if she may seem like she is hardcore flirting with you don't take it as flirtation at all, only pay attention as flirtation if she is making her best effort to get your attention all the time and really shows she wants to pursue you. Guys I don't know, they are mostly blunt about it no matter straight or gay. They'll tell you in a minute if they want to tap that or not.

What I'm doing is working on myself to prove I can hold my own and let the people surround that atmosphere to gravitate towards me naturally than go out and venture. I'm not shy, just being practical. Oh people who are more powerful to you in your mind will notice this, but it's best you look at those powerful people as individuals not "powerful people" in some disillusion that they are unattainable, I mean don't set yourself short is what I'm saying.

Are you in a long distance relationship with someone else who has kids or do you? I didn't get that last part.