[Heartpony123]

I am 18 years old and I have been with my boyfriend for about 3 years. For almost the entirety of that time I have been having sexual fantasies about his father. I don't know how to feel about it, and I feel like I'm crazy. Every time I'm near him I can't talk because I feel like I might say something that might tell him how I feel. Essentially I turn mute. I'm scared because I love my boyfriend and I just want these fantasies to go away.

[Skeezyks]

Hello Heartpony123: You know... I can't say what's going on with you here. Perhaps a psychologist could offer some sort of psychological theory of what's happening. Maybe, in some way, it is simply based in some anxiety you are struggling with.

The one thing I do know is that sexual fantasies occur to everyone. (If you continue on here on PC & read various posts, particularly in the Sexual and Gender Issues forum, you'll begin to see this for yourself.) So, from my perspective, while what you are experiencing is obviously troublesome to you, it's really not all that unusual. And you are most definitely not crazy!

Sometimes, though, in order to get rid of these sorts of concerns, it is necessary to talk them through with someone. So, if this continues to be a problem for you, my suggestion would be to seek out a counselor, or mental health therapist, with whom you can share what is going on with you. Simply talking it through may well put the problem to rest. But in addition a skilled therapist may be able to help you resolve the anxiety you are feeling with regard to this situation.

Anyway... I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

[PumpkinPieHead]

Intrusive sexual fantasies just happen, love.

I recommend pretending that his Dad is something gross until they disappear!

[FosterEdan]

i think you fall in love with your bf's father and your body wants him to close you for sex. but its very difficult to share your feeling to his father.you can control your body to have sex with his father. OR go to any therapist

[FosterEdan]

Originally Posted by Heartpony123

I am 18 years old and I have been with my boyfriend for about 3 years. For almost the entirety of that time I have been having sexual fantasies about his father. I don't know how to feel about it, and I feel like I'm crazy. Every time I'm near him I can't talk because I feel like I might say something that might tell him how I feel. Essentially I turn mute. I'm scared because I love my boyfriend and I just want these fantasies to go away.

i think you fall in love with your bf's father. your body wants him to close you.it is very difficult to share your feelings to his father or don't know whats his reaction.control your feelings its not good he is your bf's father.

[Sad Mermaid]

Originally Posted by Heartpony123

I am 18 years old and I have been with my boyfriend for about 3 years. For almost the entirety of that time I have been having sexual fantasies about his father. I don't know how to feel about it, and I feel like I'm crazy. Every time I'm near him I can't talk because I feel like I might say something that might tell him how I feel. Essentially I turn mute. I'm scared because I love my boyfriend and I just want these fantasies to go away.

Try the paradoxical approach: invite those fantasies and look at them, with or without masturbation. If you stop forbidding them, they might eventually cede on their own. Clearly what you have been doing so far has not been successful, so why not try an opposite approach.

[Travelinglady]

I'm thinking both your boyfriend and his dad are your "type." Do they look/act anything alike?

[Big Mama]

I have taken to many classes in psychology. I recall studying about this phenomenon. That is a very normal reaction. IT occurs often with your bf's father or brothers, and the opposite for the guys. Your mom or sisters.

You obviously have an attraction to your bf.There is likely some resemblance between the two either by means of looks or by means of mannerisms. So if you find one attractive then it makes perfect sense to find his dad or brothers attractive. If you have sex with your bf, then it is normal to think about your partners father in a sexual way. It is just something that happens.

I had similar feelings towards my H's brothers and father in the early days of our marriage. My H also shared his guilt over having an "interest" in my mom and my sister. I reassured him it was perfectly normal, and it is.

Good luck with this. I hope it passes quickly.

Please remember...sexual fantasy is nothing like reality. Take care of yourself and just enjoy that you love your boyfriend and family. I've seen enough Jerry Springer to see the end result....usually a lot of hurt feelings.