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#26
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#27
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Same thing happened to me. So I rewrote, then realized I was just repeating Entity via personal anecdotes and thoughts on the various reactions to the 2016 election. Lol. I guess I miss Sociology and PoliSci. Getting off line and going to the gym.
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#28
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Sometimes, if a post takes a while to write, the response page will go offline. It has a time limit, I think.
The best way around this is to use a word processing program to write out your lengthy and detailed replies and copy and past into the reply space. But back on topic: @ Shezerac: no, I haven't read that book. Sounds interesting though.
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![]() MY BLOG IS NOW CONVENIENTLY LOCATED HERE!! [UPDATED: 4/30/2017] LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!! |
#29
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If you can reverse the statement about women being threatened by men, you'll understand
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#30
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__________________
![]() MY BLOG IS NOW CONVENIENTLY LOCATED HERE!! [UPDATED: 4/30/2017] LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!! |
#31
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You also contradict yourself when saying the following in the OP:
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And again your statement is contradicted with another with the following more previous statement: Quote:
It seems you don't know what you want or how you want a relationship with men, and I get it, it's confusing Equality has always been there, through religion as a good example - "till death do us part" I'm a huge believer in equality and I highly treasure it. But when you say: Quote:
And be honest with yourself - if you can answer the question "Why are women threatened by sexually empowered men?", then you can also answer the question you proposed in the thread's title - "Why are men threatened by sexually empowered women?" |
#32
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VO,
you said: Quote:
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#33
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I'll bite, too.
![]() Perhaps its just a natural thing that people don't like other people having power over them. And people in general, also want to be empowered, heard, seen, and feel good. Men and women alike. And on a continuum or spectrum, the power has to go somewhere. I see men, specifically white men, as having a lot of power and privilege. Especially in the past and in history. I don't see that as a huge power inequality with women nowadays. though, it is still there. I think people just need to be kind to each other and respect each other. 2 years ago, when I'd dyed my hair pink, I was going for a walk in my then neighborhood. Two boys shouted out the window "nice ***! **** you!" at me. They weren't trying to compliment me. They were trying to embarrass me and make me feel badly and uncomfortable. they succeeded. That is controlling behavior in a negative way (trying to get power, in a dysfunctional way) and they were also probably super insecure and unhappy in their lives in at least some way. I'd like to see that kind of thing stop. Lately, I don't really see men being threatened by me or my empowerment or sexuality. But who knows. And if they are? I 1.) don't want to be around them and 2.) think it's kind of funny / odd. But just because it's not something that you or I experience, it doesn't mean its not there for other women. |
#34
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This thread is confusing. How are all men completely threatened? And what has #metoo got to do with it? Isn't metoo about 0.01% very powerful men abusing their fame, power, and money to intimidate woman into doing things they don't want to do, all the way up to sex without consent? \
I don't know what sex is. Never been anywhere close to that. But for romance, I felt that woman always had 100% of the power. And I wasn't threatened by that. |
#35
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This is deflection, just so you know.
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![]() Artchic528
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#36
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Starsky....you give me hope for the future.
Was rereading thread from the start and it made me think of this... https://de-film.com/v-patrick-batema...hP6nOB1dc.html |
#37
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Glad I give you hope though. Last edited by Anonymous50909; May 02, 2018 at 03:41 PM. |
#38
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To clarify, good post. It was logical, based in reality and personal experience, considered other viewpoints. That has become less common in discourse today, hence my comment about being hopeful. ... or maybe I just liked it because I agreed with it. Separately... ....the reason I thought of that movie and scene is because it reminds me of the generalizations, fake concern and speaking in sound bites that has become the standard in debate/discussion today. Nothing to be "weirded out by." |
#39
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#40
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__________________
![]() MY BLOG IS NOW CONVENIENTLY LOCATED HERE!! [UPDATED: 4/30/2017] LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!! |
#41
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Okay, I want in this discussion but after four pages of posts, I'm a bit overwhelmed. I'm going to go back to the first page and give this a whirl... a little superfluous of me to just post this but it might take a couple of hours...
__________________
My gummy-bear died. My unicorn ran away. My imaginary friend got kidnapped. The voices in my head aren't talking to me. Oh no, I'm going sane! |
#42
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I'm not real fluent in how to do a trigger warning, but the icon is up there for my second paragraph in which I describe some childhood sexual abuse without a whole lot of detail.
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I, as a man, have never been "the one calling all the shots". Heck, for that matter, I didn't call the shots as a boy either. I began this life being smothered till I stopped breathing three times before I was a year old by a mother who chose to use my infant face as a sex toy. I've then spent the next half century listening to how good I have it because I'm a guy. So, as you might imagine, I've got some rather strong feelings about that claim. Quote:
Every instance of inequality between the sexes is a sword that cuts both ways. When you said, "...every too often you see older, dominant men thinking that all women are there to please them, and if they (for example) wear clothing that is considered 'revealing' they are asking for sexually suggestive favors." you failed to acknowledge that every too often you see younger, sexually attractive women thinking that all men are there to be toyed with, used, and manipulated, and if they (for example) wear clothing that can capture the man's attention, they can use the implied promise of sex to get him to serve her. Please know that some women do this as a lifestyle. Please know that some women do this as unconsciously as some men unconsciously enjoy their own privilege. Few female servers, bartenders, casino dealers spend much time thinking about the fact that they are making a $100 a night more than their male counterparts by flirting, winking, sashaying, whatevering and then going into the employee break room or the back of the restaurant or bar and denigrate the very men they are playing to send their child to private school whereas their male counterpart is taking a second job to send his. I certainly do not want to speak for all men, but I think that those men who do have a problem with feminism, do so for very different reasons. Even among feminists, the word 'feminism' means different things to different people. So John might have a problem with an aspect of Mary's definition of feminism - and Lori calls herself a feminist and doesn't buy into Mary's definition at all. John doesn't have a problem with Lori's version of feminism at all. When definitions change and the equality goalposts keep changing depending on who you are talking to, it can become frustrating for anyone.
__________________
My gummy-bear died. My unicorn ran away. My imaginary friend got kidnapped. The voices in my head aren't talking to me. Oh no, I'm going sane! |
![]() Anonymous50909
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![]() Erebos
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#43
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#44
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You might be surprised to know that I can have a difference of opinion with someone without feeling threatened by what they say. Quote:
Feminism means different things to different people, and after a guy gets attacked by a woman like that, and she declares that she's doing it in the name of feminism...well, it's going to leave a bad taste in peoples mouths. Just to be clear, I am 100% in favor of equality for men and women. I'm not in favor of beating people up to achieve that - not women, not men.
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My gummy-bear died. My unicorn ran away. My imaginary friend got kidnapped. The voices in my head aren't talking to me. Oh no, I'm going sane! |
#45
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There are definitely different schools of feminist thought. I'm not really well versed in them. But I know that there are.
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#47
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The thing I'd disagree with, is that some women do blame all men. I've seen it online a lot. Some women, take their problems, and well, deflect them and not just blame men for their problems, but they use the current feminist movement to hide behind. I witnessed this with a (ex)friend of mine. She lies, is manipulative, plays games with others, basically, she has issues of her own. She was raped more than once by men over her lifetime, and perhaps she has reason to hate them. She's called herself a misandrist before. I think though, generalizations are not usually helpful. There are actually a lot of good guys out there. That being said, it's out there. Sexism is out there. Some women experience it still on a daily basis. All I know is I'm glad to live where I live (the US). It's not oppressive here. Not for me, anyway (though it might be for other women! I can't deny that!). If you respect me and are a good guy, I'll know it. If you have toxic male attitudes, I'll know that, too. Look at guys like Harvey Weinstein. It is out there. Even in Hollywood. But there are definitely just as terrible women out there, too. I have more stories, by the way. I was sexually harassed by boys my age in the 6th grade. My first college boyfriend was a total tool. One thing I truly believe, is that we need to teach women, especially sensitive and shy women, that we are equal. That they have rights. Because for a long time, I didn't know I did. I don't really see these kinds of issues affecting some women, and I see it affecting other women a lot. To say its not there? Is inaccurate. But to blame it for everything and all things, especially in first world countries, is also inaccurate. We need to teach women and men, boys and girls, self respect, and how to respect others. I was brought up fearful, and it was used against me: "what are you going to do if so and so finds out," "you better do your homework or your teacher will be mad." I was brought up a people pleaser. Or maybe I was a people pleaser, and then it was used to my mother's advantage, so I evolved to really care what others thought and was very manipulatable. What I really needed was to be taught self love and self respect. Not to fear what people would think of me. Not to hate myself. I do agree, that, like racism, like classism, like ableism, like ageism, sexism touches our world and life whether we know it or not. Women can definitely be abusers too though, most definitely and for sure. I think abuse and disrespect are interesting things. Sometimes people don't even know they're doing it or are not aware (men or women). Or care. Doesn't make it right though. And everybody's got an excuse. I'm going to close this, by saying that even in Buddhism, one of my most favorite things, there is sexism (against women) and misogyny. But to the great men out there. Please keep being you. It is greatly appreciated. We all have different experiences in life, and they are all valid. |
![]() unaluna, yagr
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#48
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![]() What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
#49
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Okay, here's my question for the OP:
You speak in large generalities here. Where is this experience you speak of coming from? Who and where are these men that you say feel this way? Are they co-workers? Is this coming from men in your family who behave this way? Or is this just bloggers that you are reading who are writing with the attempt to write something that will be shocking and go viral? If I speak from my own, personal experience with men it's that many of them appreciate powerful, competent women. When they hear of abuse that women have suffered, they are amazed and shocked at their fellow male's behavior, not supportive. I have found, in my work experience, that powerful men may be just as abusive and powerful women. I know plenty of men who have been sexually harassed in the workplace by women in positions of power. Older men, from the Matures and Baby Boomers, have different opinions of increasing female independence. I have found that, while supportive, they often aren't aware that their speech can still be somewhat oppressive, but they don't really mean any harm. For example, sometimes the words my grandfather would use to describe me as an independent woman were unintentionally derogatory, but he was fully supportive of me. On the other hand, I have seen male colleagues beaten out for promotions by women whose only complaint was that they got beaten out by "some chick." I think that was a narrow-minded viewpoint, but more rare than I would say commonplace. Millenial males that I know seem completely accustomed to the equality of men and women. Gen X men are afraid of women, lol, and feel dominated by them. I say this from my experience as a Gen X woman, and dating Gen X men. And as far as Millenials, I have many Millenial friends and colleagues. So these are my observations from the actual men that I know. As you can see, it's widely varied. I don't think the entire male complex is threatened by women anymore than the entire White complex is threatened by minority equality. Small groups of haters can be VERY loud, but it's not a majority opinion. Seesaw
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![]() What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
![]() s4ndm4n2006
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#50
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I'm sorry you find this thread so confusing, but if you read through it all, it's all actually quite clear.
__________________
![]() MY BLOG IS NOW CONVENIENTLY LOCATED HERE!! [UPDATED: 4/30/2017] LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!! |
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