[iknowpi]

I'm 20, never had a boyfriend. I've never masturbated, I don't think I know how. I'm completely disinterested in having sex. I'm afraid to go for a gyno exam. I'm afraid to be in a relationship, because I would be expected to have sex. Can anyone relate to this or part of this? Any suggestions for how I can get myself brave enough to do it?

[Raynaadi]

Maybe you're just not ready. You're still quite young. I know people are having sex younger and younger these days but that doesn't mean everyone is ready young. I was 21 before I lost my virginity because I just wasn't ready.

As far as masturbation goes, that might you get some interest. I know I had to know my own body before I could let someone else know it. It helps too because I know what I like, and I can let my boyfriend know.

Don't worry so much about when it happens. Like I said I waited until I was 21 but I didn't really enjoy it until about 7 months ago, and I'm 28. Everyone's body is different too. Don't let society pressure you.....at least you know you don't have to worry about an unwanted pregnancy or getting an STD. Those were my big worries and partly why I waited. And I still didn't get off scott free for waiting. After I did it I hit the ground running so to speak.

Just be gentle with yourself and don't worry about needing to do it right away. If you get in a relationship with the right person, they'll understand that you're not ready, and if they pressure you, they're not the right person. I left plenty of guys because they wanted me to have sex with them.


Rayna

[iknowpi]

Thanks for replying. I guess you're right. I just get so wrapped up with the fact that all my friends 15-20 seem to be doing it, and talking about doing it.

[Raynaadi]

Yeah....its really too bad that people are feeling so pressured to do it so young. Its so hard to consider the consequences about it too. Quite honestly I still wish I had waited even longer!

[youOme]

Don't pressure yourself and don't let outside pressure influence you either. There is nothing wrong with holding off and being a virgin, saving yourself....no matter the age. Sex is everywhere and not having sex seems deviant or abnormal in some way...well, it's not. I also think the reason your scared or uninterested is because you've never experienced it. Sex is a lot more then just intercourse, it's affectionate and intimate with a partner. That part seems more scarier to some people then the actual penetration. It was for me personally. I'd wait till you find the right person that you'd be comfortable having closeness with first. Make the first time a great and loving experience.