[Transarchist2001]

Okay, first off I want to say that in no way shape or form do I condone incest, rape, or underage activity. Anyone going through anything along these lines, please tell someone and get help. I was there, it's scary. But anyways, back to why I'm here.

My father left my mother at a young age, and as such I never had a father figure in my life. As such, my mother had to do the job of two parents on top of the three she was already working. So even though my survival needs were met, I don't remember having much of an emotional bond with my mother.

This... damaged me to say the least.

Possible trigger:

Not even to mention that I am a survivor of CSA. I thank God it ended when I was still younger, however it still affected me. So even though I always knew what sex was, I didn't understand it until around 11 or 12. However, even at that early active age I still fantasized about a relationshil with a father/mother figure. Keep in mind, I don't want to have sex with my parents or anyone remotely resembling them. This is a fantasy here. But even then, throughout this fantasy and several others, I imagine myself anywhere from the ages of 12-16.

However, I still have a specific type and traits that I dream about.

Keep in mind, these fantasy partners in no way resemble either of my parents. Just... what I wish they were? If that makes sense, question mark? I seriously don't know. But is this normal, like any of this?

[Skeezyks]

I don't think there is really much I can offer with regard to your concern. But I noticed you had yet to receive a reply to your post. So I thought I would at least acknowledge it.

I think about all I can say, with regard to your fantasies, is we all have our fantasies. And thoughts are just thoughts... nothing more. So, given what you went through growing up, your fantasies sound pretty "normal" to me. (That is... they are perhaps to be expected.)

There's an old saying that goes: "It's a case of mind over matter. IF you don't mind, it doesn't matter." But if these fantasies are of concern to you, then talking with a skilled mental health therapist about what you experienced growing up, & your fantasies, seems to me to have the best potential for resolving any lingering concerns you may have.

Here are links to 4 articles, from Psych Central's archives, on the subject of healing your inner child:

Healing Your Inner Child

6 Steps to Help Heal Your Inner Child

Healing My Inner Child

How I Healed My Inner Child



P.S. You may also want to take a look at the Childhood Emotional Neglect forum. Here's a link to that one just in case you haven't already found it:

https://psychcentralforums.com/child...ional-neglect/

And here are links to 2 articles, also from PC's archives, on that subject as well:

https://psychcentral.com/blog/childh...he-fatal-flaw/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/invisi...ional-neglect/

Best wishes...

[tryingtobeconstruct]

Yes, it's normal. In fact, there's a whole genre of sexuality in which a girl refers to her partner as "daddy".

But more important, who cares if it's normal? Everybody has their own set of kinks. As long as you stay safe, go ahead and have the fantasies you want.