[AleisterCrowley]

Im just curious to how ye would interpretate a night terror I had.

My dream was in black and grey.
I was laying on the bed, sleep paralyzed.
Thinking little of it, I figured out, I'll slowly move my bodyparts in an attenmpt to wake my body up ( this used to happen irl, so i wasnt scared more used to it)
I sensed that there was someone with me in the room, so I quickly tried to wake my body up to fight for myself. After succesfully manging to wake up, there a creepy doll head looking upon me. In anger I kicked the head into the darker part of my room, I ran downstairs to my dad to find him with only his upper body, alive though with a really long left arm
This is when things get really weird, I suddenly appear on my bed again as if the dream was starting over again, sleep paralyzed this time I hear a loud scream getting louder and louder never seizing. I mumble in desperation, to speak to my tormentors, I make a plead with them (lying), i tell them I will depart from my faith if you stop tormenting me. Moments later I wake up

[Big Mama]

Are you by any chance a survivor of sexual abuse, especially child sexual abuse. That is what it sounds like to me. I don;t want to get into that with out first knowing if that is correct or not.

[AleisterCrowley]

Originally Posted by Big Mama

Are you by any chance a survivor of sexual abuse, especially child sexual abuse. That is what it sounds like to me. I don;t want to get into that with out first knowing if that is correct or not.

No.. But i fell in love with a girl who so happened to be a slut, very displeased with that.

At the time I was a Christian, God gave unto me a person who just so happened to be ugly (not that I care), and a slut. As my love grew bigger, my grief over her past history got more intense.
I decided to rebel against God, quench the love within me only to end up as an emotionless, paranoid person with litteraly no consience not even a voice letting me know if am wrong or right.

I realized things had gone too far as I was now feeling peace and calma after hurting people, so as I'm repenting I was getting tormented in my sleep for 2 days.
I'm fine and atleast feel sane now :P, weak conscience, and the love within me was rekindled, my perspective has gone back to normal ( used to view people as objects) and all my emotions are back..

I dont know if that has to do with anything, but most likely..

[Big Mama]

Interesting. I am glad things are going better for you now. Hope it continues to out in your favor.

[nc09]

I think you were scared and that's why it turned into a nightmare. You believed that what you said would make it stop. You can also use faith to help you in dreams. I think you are also scared either of being Christian or not being Christian. You have let your faith put a lot of pressure on you and that has led to things you regret. I get night terrors and think I am just scared of my own mind.