Combatting Negative Thoughts

AUTOMATIC THOUGHTS - STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS

I'm really sad today. I almost want to cry. I feel like such a loser. It seems like everyone else is making progress except me. I lack confidence, so I'm afraid to reach out to other potential business associates because I feel like I have nothing to offer. This other guy and a bunch of other people are better than me.

I am tired of getting rejected. People who say they are going to do stuff, don't. I feel like I'm being marginalized. I'm waiting to hear about a potential project. If I get the project, I'm in good shape but I'm pissed that I haven't heard anything yet. Was told it was suppose to happen late August, early September but it hasn't happened yet. Then I was told maybe mid- to late October but haven't gotten a definitive answer. Indications are positive. This will be the beginning of my "comeback of the year" story. It would be an incredible opportunity to get me back on track.

I feel lonely. Like I'm in this endeavor all by myself. I feel scared. I'm tired of feeling scared. I know I have a lot to offer but I suffer from an inferiority complex. Not always but often enough, especially when I'm tired as I am today. I hardly slept last night, so I'm pretty tired this morning. I feel like I'm letting my wife down because of my lack of confidence and courage.

I'm feeling like I have no direction, which is my own damn fault. I need to put a plan in place and then execute against it.

OK. I just listed all of my "automatic thoughts". I am now going to try to go through them and make a case against them.

RATIONAL RESPONSE

I feel like such a loser
It is useless for me to label myself so harshly. There have been plenty of times when I have felt like a "winner". I have a lot to offer and some great opportunities. Moreover, I am a fighter.

Everyone is making more progress than me
Certainly not "everyone" is making more progress than you. In terms of the person to whom you are referring, it doesn't matter what progress he is or is not making, and it does you no good to compare yourself against him. You simply need to put together an action plan and act.

Other people are better than me
You are very talented. You are on the verge of great things. Don't give up. There are other people who are smart, talented and accomplished. Doesn't really matter. You are ALSO smart, talented and accomplished. I mean look at your background, and you can certainly present yourself extremely well. Be the "comeback player of the year". You can do it!

I'm afraid to reach out to people
Put together a list of people you want to reach out to and then start setting up meetings for you and one of your partners. You have done a phenomenal job in the past in many meetings. This is one of your strengths. When you're at your best, you're as good as anyone. You'll nail it. You and your solution have a lot to offer.

Worried about the project
Every indication is that this project is going to happen. You just sent a "wake up" email to the person who can make this happen and he responded back to you within 5 minutes and you'll be speaking with him in a few minutes. Keep the faith and your cool.

I'm lonely. I'm scared
You will start reaching out to people in the next couple of weeks. Have a frank conversation with C, so it feels more like a partnership. You also have the other options in terms of who else you can get involved in the business, so you're not all alone. Get brave. You're a fighter. You have been a fighter all of your life.

Letting wife down
You are blessed that you have such a wonderful, loving and understanding wife. Act with courage, confidence and enthusiasm to create the best possible opportunity for you and her.

I feel like I have no direction
By the end of today you will have a one-page written plan describing the 10 next steps you need to take to get your business off the ground. You have already taken a couple of them as you have been writing this post by sending out those two emails. You can do it.

RESULT

I definitely feel better than I did when I first started writing this post. Now I need to go get busy!

Hey you just answered your own question better than any of us could LOL. Good for you. Thank you for sharing and it's good to write down your feelings and then combat them with the positive.

You know if you ever get tired of what ever business you're in, you would make a great counselor or motivational speaker. Look how many days you kept your other thread going. Everyone has bad days, even bad years for that matter. I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers....hang in there ((Renovation))

Well stated, Renovation. Be well.

Well done for tackling those negative thoughts.

Good for you! This was great to read! Wishing you all the very best!

Thank you for your kind thoughts and words - I appreciate them!

Thank you. You too!

Thanks sundog!

Thank you and God bless

Greetings,

Yes, I agree with Lynn, for you sure did answer your own question. Which, btw, is what, I feel, is how one can truly come to understand. After all, anyone can preach anything , not to mention, answer any/all questions of another's , though, all the questions one truly has, he/she also possesses the answers to. In my personal opinion, of course.

Have a good one.