About self doubting...

I read this recently, thought I'd share:

Self-doubts can be so overwhelming that nothing seems to help: even if others contradict your doubt, you can’t take it in. There are three basic approaches that you can use to stop labeling yourself as unreliable.

You can learn to better handle situations that set off your self-doubts. This means pinpointing the triggers to your self-doubts, and developing active ways to deal with the triggers rather than just succumbing to your self-doubt.

You can question the authority of your inner-critic. This involves taking a close look at how you view yourself and make sure you aren't allowing your inner-critic too much power.

You can actively try to use the self-doubt as a stimulus for growth. This means you use the self-doubt as information about how you should grow.

I remember past experiences (your #2, question the authority of the inner critic) to help me. I remember when I started a new job and the first day, left my headlights on and my battery in the car burned down. Very humiliating and hard for me, asking for help from people who were still complete strangers and making myself look "dumb" for leaving on the lights.

Subsequently I was afraid to turn on the lights during the day (in the rain) because I was afraid I wouldn't remember to turn them off. But one morning I realized I generally have an excellent memory and I decided to trust myself. So, I declared out loud that I trusted myself to remember to remember to turn off the lights and "forgave" myself for my mistake (didn't hold it against me anymore). It worked like a charm and I didn't forget anymore while I had that car but took pride in remembering instead :-)

How kewl is that!

Perna, my first week on a stressful new job, I parked at City Hall, sat through a two-hour council meeting, and couldn't find my keys afterward. Because they were locked in the car! WITH THE CAR RUNNING!

Thank god for low crime in small towns.

I like your method of coping, though. I'm going to have to try it.

Candy