I think I'm starting to like myself more these days, but sadly, I'm learning that other people aren't. Growing up repressing who I am had not given me the chance to gain strength against people who didn't like me. Now, I'm really struggling to hold on in real life when I get bashings or scornful and malicious, sneering glares and words. A lot of it is probably just in my head as well. I feel comfortable enough now to not shut down, but it's real tough sometimes. Does anyone have advice for not taking what others say so deeply to heart?

Plus, I'm also starting to realize that I'm a strange person. I just didn't want to admit it before. I'm not bad... Just annoying or weird to many. Repressing myself didn't help to escape the truth that I was "weird." I only became even more weird. I'm quiet, with sudden bouts of energy and strangely deep thoughts. Although this may sound not extremely unusual, I also have a very strange vibe to myself. Because of this, I'm pretty much destined to never get along with most people, and now I'm starting to accept that. How do you feel happy with being a person left out? Sometimes I get almost envious of the happiness people get to share with others. I hope that when I do make more friends one day, they'll be all the more enjoyable to hang around because I'd appreciate them a lot.

[Perna]

When you know and like yourself well you don't pay a whole lot of attention to those who do not know and like you well. Celebrate your "strange" or "weird" self, it's "you"!

When you enjoy yourself and what you are doing, it shows and attracts others who like that too, enjoy being around you. It's like money And, you get to weed out the hangers-on, just looking to share your money/limelight/"glow", from the people you enjoy being with and who enjoy being with you, your friends. One can do it the "other" way, find someone one enjoys and hang with them (why we join "groups" -- we all have something in common to begin with) but just doing your own thing and enjoying it, looking up occasionally to survey the scene, you'll notice a bunch of people around you and some of them you'll realize you enjoy having around.

You don't have to evade put-downs, you have to be too busy to notice because they don't "make sense". Your mama wears combat boots! :-) Make you feel bad? No, because it doesn't make sense in your personal world. It just becomes a bit funny that someone thinks that will bother you? It's a child's taunt and you are not a child.

Thanks Perna. I know you are trying to help. But sometimes I do feel like a child, even as an adult, because these taunts honestly do bring me down. No, it's not the meaning of the taunt. It's the fact that these people are exercising power over me. That they can say what they want to me, more than to others, because they know they can get away with it. It reminds me of how friendless I am . Maybe I have some more self-esteem work to do? Plus, I should add that some of the things people bring me down about are some of the faults I had suppressed with the rest of my personality. For one, I can be strangely distant or act overly confident. I also spend a lot of time alone. Maybe I'm lazy, but I feel socially anxious. I'm also pretty disinterested in anything I don't take an interest in. The list goes on...

What you said about being yourself couldn't be more true . I think once I learn to be myself I can start attracting friends like myself. I'm starting to find out what things I like, since I always had rejected my own wants, and even what my faults are that come along with them.