[jimmy rich]

After I worked at therapy for a while, it became obvious that one of my paramount issues was BAD self esteem so I got into a self esteem workshop and from there studied a lot of Jack Canfield's books and tapes on the subject. I used a lot of affirmations and concepts to gradually undo the mental damages from a bad childhood and slowly construct a better set of self esteem/respect concepts and attitudes which are still a little weak but way better than my original self contempt. It's been a long and difficult road of being over confident and then back to under-confident, but I'm getting there thanks to ppl like Jack Canfield.
The theory of good self esteem is pretty obvious to me but putting it into place is the hard part and many ppl fail and give up unless they experience INSTANT positive results the fist time they try to tell them self "I'm OK" or "I'm good enough" because the old, ingrained voice comes up to tell them it's all B.S.! I found very few ppl can do "mirror work" which is looking into a mirror and telling your self nice things like: "Hey, cool nose! or "I like your eyes, jaw, ears, etc, etc". As soon as the dissing part of them pops up, they turn and run like HELL! It will seem strange and uncomfortable at first to get your self to believe you are: OK, wonderful, beautiful, smart, good, talented, deservant, etc. and parts inside of us will fight like the dickens to get us to give up and go back to the garbage ignorant others programmed into us but what option do we have? We can allow the damaging, hurtful and destructive voices/energies that very stupid others put in us from day one or begin to see and feel better about our self - the sooner the better. But, IMO, it takes a little dedicated work to undo what significant others did to us when we had no defense against them. We can confront the LIES of our parents and significant others and replace them with other, better LIES - that we are indeed OK, lovable, good, fun, pleasant, BEAUTIFUL, talented, etc. I use the term "lies" but in reality these will be the new TRUTHS we place within our own minds and hearts to take down and replace the ROTTEN LIES ignorant others shoved down our throats when we were vulnerable and trusted those IDIOTS - who them self were damaged by the IDIOTS before them. There is absolutely no reason or excuse for mentally damaging a child the way many ppl were damaged by ignorant or perhaps misguided ppl who had the power to twist and cripple those children's minds BUT, there is hope for all of them IF they can find the courage to CONFRONT the rotten lies their abusers installed in them and replace those rotten lies with JOYOUS TRUTHS so, in the end, it's all up to me and you to fix our self and become happy again. The other way is to have a spiritual awakening which can obliterate all of those rotten lies in one stroke. It's your choice but both will work if you try.
jim

[Travelinglady]

Thanks, jim!

[Fuzzybear]

[Onward2wards]

Thanks for this thread.

What seems to stop my progress every time is my mind basically saying, "Okay, I will give you better confidence and higher self-worth IF I experience an objective positive change first." That's understandable, but assuming a positive attitude BEFORE there is that objective evidence is necessary to get yourself moving in the first place. No action, no positive experience, therefore no increase in confidence or self-worth. It's like I'm caught in the ultimate Catch-22. Nothing seems to be breaking the impasse except a sheer act of will, which doesn't last long enough.

[jimmy rich]

Originally Posted by Onward2wards

Thanks for this thread.

What seems to stop my progress every time is my mind basically saying, "Okay, I will give you better confidence and higher self-worth IF I experience an objective positive change first."

LOL, well, that's where I would CHANGE MY MIND.