going to take care of the mother

Thanks everyonr who is so here for me through all this you have no idea how helpfull you are.i had lost the connection i had and am now at the library i so need to talk to someone.i only have one week and one day left YAY and i was doing so well.UNTILL my son called me to give me his news.HE IS GOING OVER SEAS!!!!!he is in the marines and is being shipped to okinowa japan.i am not even allowed to be upset because of the witch.i was in shock.i told her and she just started having a histerical fit crying about how it is her only grandson and all and he doesnt call her.hear it is, my son just told me he will be living in japan for the next 4 years at least and it is once again all about the mother.take care of the mother.the mother is hurting about this.I understand it is her only grandson but he is my son my only child im hurting and i miss him. she never even sees him, maby 2 times in the last 10 years she dont really care.she wont even call him on the phone because as i know she just dont do that.i spent the day dealing with the mothers grief over him going and i am just numb over it .so tired.i can be no other way.even if i wanted to.i just left the house when i had had about enough went and sat in the sun and got one heck of a sun burn.maby stayed out to long but hell it was way better than looking at her.dealing with her crying every time she looks at me.I HATE HER 8 more days and im done never again.the sound of her walker scraping on the ground will never leave me.she is true evil.im so sorry i really am trying to be positive but i got nothing left.it is just gone
I can only give what i have,and this i will freely do
untill i have nothing left to give,this is who i am

only 7 more days and i am out of this hell

Granite, I'm sorry ... Yes, 7 more days!!

thanks sannah im kind of over the shock of my sons news.when i get home it will only be about 19 days before he comes home on leave before he ships out to japan.after talking to him again and after the shock,i cant be sad he is so happy he is going he is on cloud 9.i really am glad he is going to be able to do what he wants he has worked so hard to get to whare he is i would never take that away from him.i told him i want jade from japan and that would make it all better .not really but what ya gonna do?i would never want him to feel like i do about the mother by crushing everything he wants by insisting he feel bad for me.yes ill miss him but the sound of such happiness in his voice and pride was so priceless.the mother will never experiance what that feels like from me or him.my son has given me the best possible gift.the confidence and ability to follow his dreams and what he wants out of life.NO REGRETS

Oh wow, same damn thing Im going through with my mom but I upped and left my life and moved home because I had to fix the house so it wouldnt fall in on her. SHe delayed her knee surgery for months just to get me stuck here through winter. She slams doors, too and freaks out when she cant get one of her cats inside before bedtime. She actually goes into hysterics and expects me to understand. I dont. Well, Granite, your sentence is very short and I know you will make it. Take a deep breath, dont let the stress do your body harm. Hugs

thanks nomore.i had to giggle at your cat story the mother has 2 cats and she was freaking because i came to the library to chat here and got back to jail a bit late and she had a fit because she had to feed the cats because they were begging her.only 5 more days and my life will resemble some what what it use to be.

I like how you are thinking about your son Granite! Five more days!!!

thanks sannah only 4 now yay im feeling quite good about going home i hope it is as welcoming as i am wishing

Four more days!!!

sannah i wish i had some way of thanking you for all the support you have given me through all this.you made it so much easier for me and you didnt have to.i can only say thanks and if you ever need anything ask and if it is in my power to help i sure will i owe you so much.THANK YOU.3 more days

Granite, you are so welcome! It is my pleasure to support you! You have actually done quite well I think. It sucked for you to be there but you did well against it don't you think? How can you imagine your first therapy appt. to be like when you get back?

3 more days!!!

believe it or not sannah i have thought a lot about thatand i see many differnt ways it could go.im sure she will ask how my mother is and how my trip went etc...but maby not.but the answers i have running through my head are so angry.stuff like oh it was just a stinking party,or awsome its a blast and i just love my mommy time etc...and then not be able to talk the rest of the session.i guess im still a bit angry with her or am still real scared to talk and that is a perfect way to assure she wont keep talking to me.what i wish for is for me to not do that and for me to just tell her I hated every minute of it and it was hard,hurtfull,and miserable.and i thought about home and my hussband and therapy the whole time i was gone and im glad im home.but i know ill never say that because i dont want her to say i had a choice and i choose to come here.i know i did and i have to live with the consiquences of being miserable for that.i just dont want to be reminded of it.anyway realisticall im sure all ill do is say hi sit an my chair and panic and not say a word because im to scared.1 1/2 more days.BTW i am totally happy with how well i dealt with this time i have been here, only one minor problem with getting mad and sitting out in the sun for too long and getting a masive sunburn, not one of my smarter ideas at the time but now i hve a kicking tan lol..

i hate the *****!!!!!so it started monday when she woke up she was whyining about how she hurt and all and didnt want to go to PT.WHATEVER.so when i didnt respond to that on the way to PT she starts complaining about her other knee and what is she going to do now that that one is starting to hurt etc... so i told her outright that i will not be comming down here again like this and if she wanted help she was going to have to move back to my state etc...Im sick of it and i dont want to be taking care of her forever.sooo.wednsday came and she had PT again and she refused to do anything so she ended up just getting an hour long mesage on her leg no work.so today i go to the pool and come back to find today she has just cancled todays pt appt.when asked why she said she just didnt want to go.DAMN IT i gave up my life for three helish long weeks to care for this ***.and i left a friend who just lost her 20 year old son and is seriously grieving and wanted me to stay to take care of her ***.i left a friend who is dying of cancer who i bring on mondays to get her nails and toes painted so she can feel a little better about her bold head,so i can take care of her ***.i used up all my vacation time, left myhusband for three weeks,stopped therapy for a month.all so i can thake care of her ***.AND SHE QUITS DOING WHAT SHE NEEDS TO BE DOING TO GET BETTER THE WEEK I AM LEAVING.**** HERwords just cant even begin to express the anger i am feeling right now i have no idea what to do to calm down i really dont i called my husband to let him know how out of controle i am but he cant helf OMG i hate life

I'm sorry granite .... I only know your mother from what you have told me and from this I wouldn't expect much better from her. You have 2 days left. You know what you are dealing with. You did what you felt you needed to do and you are a good person. Your mother can't match the type of person that you are. She doesn't have a clue, she doesn't have a heart, she just doesn't have what you have.

sannah you are so right, im on my way home now and im so done with her im going home to hubby.who loves me

Yah!! Very good! I'm so glad that you have a good husband! Good choosing on your part! Have a good trip home!