[Gemstone]

I have my first holiday party tonight. These things are terribly triggering for me. Just the holidays alone are enough so set me off, but mingling with a bunch of people that I don’t like making meaningless conversation is just plain awful for me.

The holidays hold too many bad memories for me. The decorations, the smells, etc always upset me. The holidays were never good for me growing up.

Why did I have to pick a job where I have to go to a ton of these things? I don’t know if I can do it, but if I don’t people take it personally. I hate parties!!!

I want to go home and go to bed. I had a bad t session and I don’t know that I can hold it together tonight.

I'm sorry it's so hard for you Gem.

((( hugs )))

That's all I got for you right now.

Petunia

(((((((((((Gem)))))))))))

Hoping you find a bit of peace this week.

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((Gem))))))))))))))))



With empathy,
Fuzzy Paws

[kimmydawn]

((((((((((Gem)))))))))))

I hope you a good, safe night.

KD

[bipolar_bear]

((((((((((((((Gem))))))))))))))))))) I am sorry that your job requires you to go to so many parties. It is so hard when you are not emotionally prepared to go. I hope it was better than you anticipated.

[JustBen]

I can really sympathize with having to make meaningless conversation with people you don't like. It's just something you can't look forward to.

[Lexicon78]

Try to hang in there. I know this is especially hard for you right now, but just remember that you are an adult now and no one can hurt you the way they did as when you were a child. When you were a child you were helpless, but as an adult you have the power to change all of that. Good luck.

[Gemstone]

Thanks for the responses everyone.

The party wasnt as bad as expected. It got really busy so I managed to slip out the back early.

I dont understand how people can like these things. They are so fake and stuffy. I have 2 more scheduled next week. I managed to get out of one tonight; I caught a cold.

I work in commercial real estate so all of my client's business' each have a party. Last night was my companys holiday party. I try to come up with excuses to get out of them but my clients get offended if I dont go. I just have to suck it up. Its bad business not to go.

[CJR520]

I have always thought these kind of parties are hilarious! People are jealous of each other all year long and there is so much quarreling going on at job places these days. Then everyone gets together for the big fake job!!

[Peanuts]

I agree with your observation about office holiday parties. It has also been my observation that all through the year the petty little games and back stabbing events that go on between employees on the same work team and with management all wraps up to everyone getting together for a "holiday" party where gifts are exchanged and everyone pretends they actually have any respect what so ever for anyone else in the room. And there is always some kiss-up who will take up a collection to get a "gift" for the boss. It is not a gift from the heart and it is not a gift with warm feelins... it is a gift of self-preservation because you certainly don't want to be the only one not contributing.

But perhaps a more useful way to look at the whole office party gig is that maybe it's a kind of detante. An hour or so where everyone lays down their arms and agree to a cease-fire over a mug of egg nog. Sometimes I just pretend I'm a U.N. peacekeeping observer ...

[JustBen]

I never experienced much conflict in the workplace until this year. Not really something I'm involved in so much as two people I work closely with at each other's throats. It will be interesting to see how they relate at the holiday party.