To Whom it May Concern,
Hello, my name is Linda and I'm a eighteen year old female who is being verbally abused by my parents, and I was wondering if any of you had any advise or me. I have already tried everything, from suicide hospitalizations, to individual and family counseling, to Child Protective Services, to support groups, to 24 hr hotlines, to psychologist, to psychiatrist, to school counselors, to Ward of the Court, to Emancipation, and to the San Mateo County Police Station. The verbal abuse has been this way since 2000, and it has gotten worse and worse. What can I do next? What is left to be done? What did I do wrong to deserve this? All the people who I talk to either don't believe me, betrays me, talks behind my back, doesn't keep things confidential (and it has nothing to do with what they can't keep confidential.), or they are verbally abusive to me to. I need serious help, i'm stuck!! All I did was to tell the police that my dad was hitting my mom and when my dad got back from jail, he and my mom were like this. Why isn't my sister getting any of this? When I was my sisters age, I was being physically and sexually abuse, also I was kidnapped and raped a age 7. My sisters like a pot of gold to my parents, and me, I'm just trash. Even if my sister is just yelling just for the fun of it, my parents will still run to her as if the house was about to blow up and that we needed to evacuate the building immediately. However, if i’m yelling because i’m in need,(and that’s the only time I yell. I only yell if i’m in need of help, but other than that, I don’t really yell.) Like I accidentally got a cut or something, my parents will just ignore me and say “ha ha, o’ it’s just the ***** yelling, and/or that’s what you get. I'm really tired and frustrated with my parents because I'm the only one who doesn't want this to happen anymore so I go out and ask for help, but my parents they just sit and stare, they don't do anything. I don't understand what I did to my parents to deserve this. Now that you have read my history, it's obvious where my depression came from. I wish that there was some type of medication that can erase the negative side from my mind, and keep all the positives in me. All the memories from the past 16 years have been effecting me, and until I can escape from my parents or escape from this house, I personally don't think there is a path towards recovery for me. But all I can do right now for myself, is be patient and stay strong until 02/24/2004 when I can finally escape after all these years of hell. All I feel like doing right now is to commit suicide because I feel so hopeless. I need serious help. what can I do??

PS: Thanks to all of you who are taking time and effort to write back to me. Talk to you soon!!

Linda

[(JD)]

I am sorry to hear what you are going through. Since you are 18, will you soon be out on your own? There are women in distress groups that will help you get out of the situation and help you make plans for the future... if you cannot do this on your own.

Some ppl never grow up. There are usually some of them we call relatives... it hurts more because the moral statute "requires" your loved ones to help you not hurt you.\

Obviously you have learned behavior in your efforts to survive this situation. A good therapist to help you RE learn proper responses to such ppl and abuse should be high on your list of taking care of you!

It isn't hopeless right now, even though I know you feel that way... be what you can till you come up for air, then take care of yourself!

NO ONE DESERVES to be abused. Those are the "looters" intentions for their victims... they make us think we did something wrong.

be safe.

<font color=blue> meditation is a true way to connect to the Source </font color=blue>

[Rapunzel]

Hi Linda,

You didn't do anything to your parents to make them treat you this way, and you do not deserve to be abused. It sounds like getting out away from your parents would be a very good thing for you - but you need to find others who will treat you right. I know it's hard. You need to have people on your side, and your family should be but they aren't. Still, even though they do this to you, they are your family and you probably have some hope or wish that they would just change. But you can't just wait around and let them keep doing this to you. Nobody can make them change, but you can distance yourself from them and make a better life for yourself from this point forward.


<font color=orange>There is an easy answer to your problem that is neat, plausible, and wrong.

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