[granite1]

http://adultsurvivors.blogspot.com/

[likewater]

The article started voices in my head

[unaluna]

thanks, granite. good stuff,

[purple_fins]

Yes, thanks that is a great article.

Many children, in desperation, learn to care prematurely for themselves...at the expense of trust in others, emotional growth and self-acceptance. Unfortunately, try as they might, such children can never absolutely ensure their survival, simply because it is never absolutely within their control.

*sigh*... yep I know this all too well. took care of self a lot and thus leaning on others now(when I really should be) is so so difficult.

Survivors with PTSD may avoid any intimate connection, often resulting in feelings of detachment or estrangement from others.

so alone... yes....

they may have constricted feelings. They may be unable to identify and express a wide range of emotions, particularly the anger, fear and sadness so closely associated with the original traumatic events.

THIS! just WHAT is it that I feel about this trauma or that abuse..--

Traumatic events that are human in origin seem to have more severe after-effects than natural disasters. Hurtful and frightening as it is to be raped by a stranger, or to be in the path of a natural disaster, the creation of a personal disaster by a loved one is vastly more bewildering and overwhelming.

I truly believe in this statement... as I've been at the hands of both types of trauma and the longest lasting ones are the ones committed by "loved" ones.

The younger the victim, the more vulnerable he is. The more developmental skills and life experiences uncontaminated by trauma a child has, the more he has to draw on in the face of trauma. When life goes well, and children are loved and protected, each day is like a deposit in a savings account. Neglect, repeated physical abuse or sexual assault...or other life-threatening events, make huge withdrawals on the account. The more a child has in the bank when the trauma occurs, the better the prognosis for a quick recovery. Small children who are repeatedly traumatized usually have few deposits and easily become emotionally bankrupt.

yes, this makes such perfect sense.... *sigh*.... blech... no wonder some of us have to work so hard with such a defecit to fill in.....

gawd-- Im beginning to HATE where I come from- my past....you know what?-- I had a dream once that as a child I was in a race-- all the kids had tennis shoes on but me-- I was running the race in those flimsy flip-flops.... such a peek at the notion that I've been at a disadvantage compared to a lot of people....
I hope that some of us can have a chance to run "the race" with tennis shoes too someday...

thanks for posting this granite... hope I didn't go on too long!

fins