[brianm101]

A friend of mine thought that I should post this so I did. I hope that you don't mind.

In the realm of pain and anguish
Begging for release of Death,
Lies the child with brutal mother
Battered day by day with stealth.
All who know the gentle lady
See her kindness shining bright,
See the woman love her children
See her beauty, power and might.

All who know the kindly woman
Know her nature full of care,
Every act of selfless wonder
Perfect mother true and fair.

But in struggle through the daytime
Father working all day long,
Stress builds up, she suffers torment
Anger soon becomes her song.

Children now ask one more question
Seek to find out what to do,
Mother's too confused to answer
Screams out loud an oath or two.

Ranting raving for an hour
Children’s ears are filled with pain,
And their hearts so young and tender
Fill with anguish once again.

In the tea medicinal brandy
Just to calm her nerves once more,
After all she really needs it
Her emotions jagged, raw.

Then in time she sees the reason
Sees the cause of all her pain,
Should she not have seen it sooner?
It's her children! They're to blame.

If at fault they must be punished
Cleansed and purified by pain,
She's the one ordained to free them
Lawful torture once again.

Thus she lifts the cane above her
Rage does grip her soul so tight,
Down it sweeps, She strikes out blindly
What cares she who's wrong or right.

Frenzy overtakes her spirit
Thrashing wildly all around,
Striking out in raging fury
Deadly killer instinct found.

Beating at her helpless children
Bamboo cane sings once again
All her self-control departed
Children drown in endless pain.

Swarming welts of angry crimson
Swathe their pink and tender flesh,
Two young lives in Hell's own cauldron
Wince from wounds so new and fresh.

Now the knife is twisted slowly
Mental pain to fan the flame,
Children they did caused the anguish
Mother tells them they're to blame.

They're the guilty ones for certain
Hidden evil brings no shame,
If the mother lost control then
Someone else must be to blame.

Guilt she heaps upon her children
Guilt is added to their pain,
Slaves at least would feel less turmoil
Slaves would only bear the cane.

Now the children’s minds in horror
View their world distorted much,
They both learn to hide their feeling
Take no pleasure from a touch.

Later in their lives, much later,
When their hearts they want to share,
Love eludes at every turning
Pain their hopes does wrest and tear.

Crucified by history's beating
Crazy from deceit and lies,
One tenacious fighting-spirit
Challenges maternal ties.

Memories deep and still subconscious
Strain to surface and be known,
Slowly from beneath the threshold
Comes the truth that must be shown

Years of tortured introspection,
Sought to cure a soul betrayed,
'Til at last the awful memories,
Pain, while be was daily flayed.

Pain once more but this time truthful
Starts to heal his shattered mind,
Now middle-aged he grasps at Life
But fate is cruel, she’s not kind.

His sister was too weak to fight
Her strength was so depleted,
Her wounds too deep she gave up hope
Into her mind retreated.

Unable to confront the truth
A drunkard mother oh so vile,
Her mind denies reality
To cringe behind a plastic smile.

Although the mask she hides behind,
Portrays a happy vision.
It buried any hopes she had,
To flee that deadly prison.

She needs to stop and face the pain,
To lance the festering wounds,
But fear does block her every move
As her mind shuts down, she swoons.

There's too much pain for her to face
The awful truth to confront,
Her past's been buried far too long
Her emotions dead and blunt.

For one last time her soul retreats
Amnesia drowns her mind,
Her body lives, but all else dies
There is nothing left behind.

A full half-century has now passed,
Since the boundless pain began.
The son’s good fortune set him free,
To watch his sister’s mind drown.

Chance revealed to each a pathway,
Fueling hope for sanity.
His good path bore life belated,
Her path, just calamity.

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

This is based on your own life of abuse correct Brian??

[brianm101]

From what I can remember.(and I don't forget much about that)

[kimmydawn]

Amazing, and I'm sorry the children suffered...sorrier yet that it never goes completely away.

KD

[wisewoman]

I am sorry. thanks for sharing in such a remarkable way.

[brianm101]

Hi Kimmy. The hardest part is the remembering. I hate it everytime I get caught up in thinking about my childhood.(and the hurt, the listening to my sister scream, the hospital, etc) I just with that I could just block it out.

Wisewoman. I thank you for your words, but don't be sorry for me....I am ok now....

[Evangelista]

Brian, you express the pain and anguish of your childhood experiences so intently in your writing. I hope it helps, I would think it would be sort of Cathargic, just reading the release of such torture..a fitting Title...

[wisewoman]

Brian, I am sorry for every child who is injured. And your courage and ability to write so well about it touched me.

[brianm101]

Don't be sorry for me. I broke free. I would like to devote this to those that haven't yet. There is still alot of pain out there. I actually hoped to dawn a little light on those that are still going through this.

Thanks for the compliments.

Brian

[brianm101]

Don't be sorry for me. I broke free. I would like to devote this to those that haven't yet. There is still alot of pain out there. I actually hoped to dawn a little light on those that are still going through this.

Thanks for the compliments.

Brian

[Sabrina]

Brian, thank you for sharing this very moving and powerful piece of writing.

[Sabrina]

Brian, thank you for sharing this very moving and powerful piece of writing.

[desirae]

I to express alot of myself through writing, it's a healing mechanism with in itself.....and in the process you can create a piece of art, which you did here.....you have a writing talent....continue doing it.

[desirae]

I to express alot of myself through writing, it's a healing mechanism with in itself.....and in the process you can create a piece of art, which you did here.....you have a writing talent....continue doing it.

[wisewoman]

Hmm, Brian, I am a little confused. It's like having someone tell you they are sorry children suffer is a bad thing, or only sorry that you suffer? I am very glad to see you writing for others who have no words to express their experience. You are a beautiful writer.

[wisewoman]

Hmm, Brian, I am a little confused. It's like having someone tell you they are sorry children suffer is a bad thing, or only sorry that you suffer? I am very glad to see you writing for others who have no words to express their experience. You are a beautiful writer.

[wisewoman]

Hmm, Brian, I am a little confused. It's like having someone tell you they are sorry children suffer is a bad thing, or only sorry that you suffer? I am very glad to see you writing for others who have no words to express their experience. You are a beautiful writer. and how can I not feel sorrow when I read what you endured?

[wisewoman]

Hmm, Brian, I am a little confused. It's like having someone tell you they are sorry children suffer is a bad thing, or only sorry that you suffer? I am very glad to see you writing for others who have no words to express their experience. You are a beautiful writer. and how can I not feel sorrow when I read what you endured?

[brianm101]

Hi Des and Wise.
I do appreciate the compliments. I wish that I could scream this stuff out. I hope that this helps at least one person going through the same thing. If it does then I may be able to let go of a lot of repressed feelings.

[brianm101]

Hi Des and Wise.
I do appreciate the compliments. I wish that I could scream this stuff out. I hope that this helps at least one person going through the same thing. If it does then I may be able to let go of a lot of repressed feelings.

[brianm101]

Sabrina. You are as tallented as the rest of us. Keep doing what you are doing and you will go far.

[brianm101]

Sabrina. You are as tallented as the rest of us. Keep doing what you are doing and you will go far.

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

((( Brian ))) I believe your story has already helped some and will continue to do so...I have seen some people come out and speak on issues they maybe would not have before they read your threads
xo

[Sabrina]

Brian - you words mean very much to me. Especially today. Thank you

[Sabrina]

Brian - you words mean very much to me. Especially today. Thank you