[kyangel04]

I'm a survivor of child sexual abuse and SRA. I deal with DID, C-PTSD, panic disorder and depression.

I have alot of blanks in my memory. Especailly, 8 years old and younger. I was abused my my father, my uncle and grandparents. They were part of the sra abuse. I don't know much more details.

I just starting to heal and recover memories. When I was 10, my mom married my stepdad. He was very abusive and sadistic. My brother was physically and verbally abusive.

I dodn't know if I shred too much. Or if I'm doing this right. I just know, I don't have ppl here who understand. Friends, who deal with DID, SRA memories etc.

I'm working on making a strong support system.

Thanks for reading and take care.

[PurpleFlyingMonkeys]

Welcome to PC, you will find a very strong support system, especially here in the survivors of abuse forum and the DD forum. I'm terribly sorry that you had to endure such things as a child.
I as well have been a victim of every abuse in the book by family and non family, close and distant relatives. It's horrible, but you are making the right decision in moving forward. It's hard and will get harder before it gets better but recovering the memories is a good first step.
I was diagnosed with DID 10 (almost 11) years ago. PTSD 11 years ago, generalized anxiety disorder just recently (before was just panic disorder) and before was diagnosed manic depressive but I've overcome that obstacle at least.
I'm sorry to hear you have been through so much pain, you have found a great place to find support here, and I hope soon you will find support in your home life as well. Cutting ties with toxic people and learning to find people who are good for you is a very important step in feeling safe. I' at this step now and it's hard. But you are uncovering memories, that's something I have yet to be able to do. You sound like you are doing wonderfully so far. Just hand in there, if you ever need to talk, feel free to pm me.
I know how important it is to find a support team, I only recently came forward about my csa from my brother, that was the most difficult to admit to, and was even able to confide this in my fiance, and he was so understanding and since than I have felt stronger and safer than I have in all of my life. You will find many on here that are understanding and wonderful support, just reach out, we are all here for eachother.
Again I am so sorry for your pain. Please message me any time you need to talk.

[Big Mama]

This is a wonderful and safe place to talk about abuse. I've had my fare share of abuse. I was raped 20ish years ago. I am just now starting to deal w/ that. There was also some neglect issues as a child and as a wife now. I live with emotional abuse almost daily. It hurts me to say that and to thank about not leaving. Until I get this strightened out I'll certinly be a frequent visitor to PC. I have a feeling even after if ever I overcome these things I'll still be visiting here. I have made friends and feel like the folks here care which is not something I am used to but am learning to imbrace.

[kyangel04]

Thanks for reading and listening. I'm anxious, I have therapy tomorrow. I'm working through alot of new stuff. It's pretty acary at times.

[Sannah]

Welcome to PC. I'll support you here.

[kyangel04]

Thank you Sannah. I'll be here for you too.