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#1
Sep 14, 2006, 10:43 PM
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he was living with me and he just moved back in with mom after 4 years of living with me. i'm 31 and he's 28.
we had a LONG conversation about our mother and how she loves us but how since we were children she was very verbally abuse and when we were children we were beaten often. I wonder how much of my problems stem from this and my brother has a lot of problems too. today is thursday and he's only been at mom's 2 days and he can't stand it now. i don't know what i'm getting at here but old memories are coming back and i'm angry at her and don't know what to do. |
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#2
Sep 14, 2006, 10:53 PM
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its okay to be angry.. it might even be good for your healing.. im sorry you endured abuse though.
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#3
Sep 14, 2006, 11:33 PM
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((( HUGS ))) - I am sorry that you had to endure such emotional wounds from your own mother, but please know that talking about it will help you to release and in effect heal..... keep talking for we are listening.
LoVe, Rhapsody - 
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#4
Sep 15, 2006, 11:40 PM
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Yes.. talking is the key..my mother was extremely abusive verbally.. and I guess in a way she was physically too because she liked to pull me around by my long hair. even picking me up off the floor with it..
It does something to a childs spirit when they are beaten down with cruel words and hands that are supposed to comfort and soothe... it gives us wrong perceptions of ourselves and the world around us..and for me, it caused alot of confusion in my head.... Talking about it allows you to release those feelings of anger.. and pain.. and disappoinment.. and even grief.. I grieved for the childhood I didn't have... The most important thing to remember through it all... is that in no way did it ever have anything to do with you or your brother.. it was all her... it was her problem.. her behavior.. she owns all of it..don't allow yourself to ever think you were just not lovable.. or you couldn't do things good enough.. none of that... it was her.. Good Luck.. I'm here for ya!!
__________________
Faith is daring the soul to go beyond what the eyes can see. |
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#5
Sep 15, 2006, 11:48 PM
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Oh yeah.. one more thing... what has helped me alot.. I learned more and more about my parents and their childhoods... it didn't excuse their behavior in any way.. but it helped me to understand them as indivuals instead of parents... I did this in therapy...
__________________
Faith is daring the soul to go beyond what the eyes can see. |
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