[ImNotHere]

I was abused growing up. Now I have obsessive/repetitive thoughts about people hurting children or what I have seen in the past. I replay past events of people hitting children (that i have seen) and cannot get them out of my head. It makes me angry and I feel crazy.

How can I accept the fact that I cannot fix the world, people will always hit kids (not that it is ok to ever hit a child in anyway), and that there is nothing I can do about it?

Obviously If I see anyone hitting a child or abusing a child I can report it but I still think about all those kids I could not help in the past/cannot help in the future, how can I let it go? How can I stop obsessing?

[BLUEDOVE]

Why not volunteer to local children's protection group,or donate to children's charities--anything that
cares for kids?

[ImNotHere]

If I volunteered I feel like that would make it worse, like I would have even more thoughts about it. I don't understand why I can't stop thinking of these things. I really hate that we live in a world where people hit and hurt children and there is nothing i can do to fix it. I just feel so helpless. I hate what I went through and I just don't want anyone else to go through those things.

[Frankbtl]

Hi ImNotHere,
Do you think one way that might help just a little is trying to have a little more faith in some other people who might speak out if they think a child might be being hurt (obviously it doesn't stop it happening in the first place but.....) if not to someone like the police then to a neighbor/friend who might take it seriously enough to encourage them to do that or do it on their behalf.
I do know if no-one stepped in for you, and sometimes people just won't that's got to be really hard for you to do. But as the years go on people are beginning to recognize child abuse better so the chances of people speaking out are increasing and each child saved from this really does count, really does matter,
And with channels like YouTube some children can receive the courage and backing to report it themselves as well. I know it never, never should happen to begin with, but the more it's put out there, the more knowledge of how wrong it is is being put out there.
And you know, you are playing a major part in all of that just by talking about your experiences and feelings on this (which I really do admire!!) "just" here.
You know, if even one/two/three....parents, family members, acquaintances of a child who's being abused, or a child who is being abused, maybe in your town, maybe hundreds of miles away, sees what you're writing......stops and thinks.......and.............(although there may well be more who are stopping and thinking!!) then that is amazing!! You yourself have to know the difference an intervention is going to make for a child.
Maybe focus a little more on the success stories?? And although I can fully understand if it's too painful for you to get too closely involved with charities for children who have been abused/may be abused, you can still maybe be involved in less "direct" ways like contributing donations or taking part in petitions.
But as well think about yourself!! Do you think you may need a little (more?) professional help with your own experiences (?) it does sound like they are still quite painful for you.
So although your compassion to others is outstanding considering your circumstances, don't forget you!!
Alison

[ImNotHere]

I do go to therapy but it hasn't helped much yet. I just can stand the thought of parents hitting their kids in anyway. I guess I am just really traumatized by my childhood. My mind is so tired from thinking about this and it drives me crazy. I just wish everyone would stop hitting their kids I am so tired of being in this world.