[christina_21]

Background cliff notes: sexual abuse from at least the age of four up to ten. Uncle and various "boyfriends" of mother.

I was never taken to the dentist when I was younger but when my DH and I decided to have a baby, I thought I should set a good example and start going. I'm 31 and only started going to the dentist five years ago. I'm always fine physically going to the appointment, not nervous at all, but the the minute they lay the chair back and lean over me, I have anxiety attacks. Just major, major anxiety attacks. They think it's just general anxiety of being at the dentist and I'm not exactly going to set them straight but it's so embarrassing and I can't stop it. The best I can do is just close my eyes and either recite my favorite songs or passages from favorite books in my head. I'm not on any medication and I don't want to be just for the dentist. I don't have problems going to a gynecologist, just the dentist. That my dentist is male may be a factor but he and his staff are great and I don't think it matters too much because it's just that presence of someone hovering above me that does it. Just so close and I can't breathe.

Can anyone else relate to this kind of problem? What have you done about it? Any recommendations for my situation?

Thank you for reading.

[gayleggg]

Have you tried Nitrus Oxide(not sure about the spelling) but it is gas that the dentists sometimes use to calm anixous patients, like me.

[00642]

It's actually quite common in people who were abused, you know? So, you're not alone, don't worry.
I'm not actually sure if I'm allowed to post links but I think this may help you? It's off a website called AfterSilence but I think it's pretty good stuff.
Dentist Visits - Rape and Sexual Abuse Survivors Message Board and Chat Room

[christina_21]

I haven't asked about the gas but I will on my next appointment. Thank you for the recommendation!

And thank you for posting the link. I'm on my way to pull it up now.

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((( Christina ))))))))))

[ThisWayOut]

I have similar issues with gyn visits... I had one doctor I trusted, but I had to move. Now I ask them to talk me through everything as they are doing it. Even then I sometimes end up shaking like crazy and the appointment gets rescheduled. With my old Dr, we had gotten into a routine of talking about random things between her prompts, but that could be difficult at the dentist.
Is there anything you could take with you that may bring you some comfort? I often have my music with me (either on my phone or ipod) in case I get too anxious or worked up. Maybe you could take something with you that allows you to listen to music or audio books? One dentist I went to had something similar to google glasses so patients could watch tv or movies while he worked on their teeth. He said it worked wonders for some people.
I'm sorry it's so triggering. I hope you find something that helps.

[Jordy]

I have this too and felt so alone with it! I haven't been to a dentist in years even though I really need to. Problem is my usual dentist knows me and my family since I was a baby so I don't feel comfortable telling him what happenned... especially as he also treats my abuser. I've been thinking about going to another one, but just can't bring myself to do so.