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#1
Nov 13, 2015, 06:06 PM
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I think it's very mean to think you're own child is so far gone they will never be fixed. It makes me feel shame. Like I will always be a little worse than the average person. I think this is completely abusive and luckily I know there's hope for me. But I can't imagine saying my kid is too sick mentally to ever be happy or "normal." They also try to diagnose me with major disorders outside of what my psychiatrists say. It's like they want to ride me off and see me as sick.
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 BrokenNBeautiful, marmaduke, Miktis25, Skeezyks, Souris, vonmoxie
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 BrokenNBeautiful
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#2
Nov 13, 2015, 07:23 PM
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Hello paradox22: The fact that you know there is hope for you means you're not the person your parents would like to make you out to be. I send warm thoughts your way in the belief that you will continue to see through you parents' negativity & over come your feeling of shame.
 
__________________
"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
| Miktis25
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| Miktis25
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#3
Nov 14, 2015, 06:16 PM
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I was conditioned in a similar way.
Carol
__________________
The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!  |
| marmaduke, Miktis25
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#4
Nov 15, 2015, 06:15 AM
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I am so sorry.
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#5
Nov 15, 2015, 12:30 PM
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Quote:
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| BrokenNBeautiful
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| BrokenNBeautiful
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#6
Nov 15, 2015, 12:38 PM
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Don't let other people define who you are. YOU are the only one who can do that. Everyone has an opinion,doesn't mean it is correct OR that it pertains to you!
YOU get to decide who you are. The shame belongs to your parents; they should want the BEST for you; love you and support you. xo |
| Miktis25
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| BrokenNBeautiful, Miktis25
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#7
Nov 16, 2015, 01:51 PM
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That is highly abusive and generally unhelpful. I'm sure that their behavior contributes greatly to any issues you may have.
I have an older brother with schizophrenia and our father is similarly down on him for everything -- he thinks my brother is essentially an invalid and a disappointment. The day before my wedding he told me he wished that my brother was dead. That's the last time I talked to my old man. My brother is a beautiful person and his mind is the result of a highly abusive childhood. |
| Anonymous32750
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#8
Nov 16, 2015, 04:51 PM
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Mine feel the same way about me yet they never bothered to be real parents.
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#9
Nov 16, 2015, 05:47 PM
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I think the sense of responsibility they have deep down about our well-being makes it hard for parents to address our troubles in a constructive manner. It's really themselves they're mad at. If they say there's something wrong with you that's your problem alone, they can tell themselves there's nothing wrong with them. It's horse poo-poo, and it's usually them who are more unfixable which they are proving by being so stubborn about looking at situations constructively.
Just keep rising above it. I already think you're 10 times saner than they are. 
__________________
“We use our minds not to discover facts but to hide them. One of things the screen hides most effectively is the body, our own body, by which I mean, the ins and outs of it, its interiors. Like a veil thrown over the skin to secure its modesty, the screen partially removes from the mind the inner states of the body, those that constitute the flow of life as it wanders in the journey of each day.” — Antonio R. Damasio, “The Feeling of What Happens: Body and Emotion in the Making of Consciousness” (p.28) |
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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