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  #26  
Old Oct 10, 2007, 11:19 AM
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darkpurplesecrets darkpurplesecrets is offline
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Location: within another world not seen. built and silenced behind a wall of fear based strength......
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((((SeptemberMorn))))

THank you for posting and reading. For caring enough to reach out to that little girl. This is the first time I have dared to post anything about me not being in more of a story form. Thank you for being there. I went into the hospital on Sept. 18th and was in for awhile. But I wanted to say thank you.

camilionwords1truth

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  #27  
Old Oct 10, 2007, 11:21 AM
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darkpurplesecrets darkpurplesecrets is offline
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((((tryingtocope))))

Thank you for your responce and caring. I ended up going into the hospital on Sept. 18th so I am just getting back to thank you.

camilionwords1truth
  #28  
Old Oct 10, 2007, 11:22 AM
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darkpurplesecrets darkpurplesecrets is offline
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((((jennyann))))

thank you again girl. I love you much.

camilionwords1truth
  #29  
Old Oct 10, 2007, 11:39 AM
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darkpurplesecrets darkpurplesecrets is offline
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(((((RiverX)))))

Question: For me knowing someone is listening for the first time and having a place of safety to come to for the first time means more than you will ever know. Knowing that I went to a church for help and they performed exercicms and then told me not to tell made me feel like I was the bad person. And no one was to listen to me talk but I was to repeat verses that esencially put me down, I had no where to turn. The prayers of those I do not even know, when my understanding of God is distorted and lost at best. It has opened a door for me to bein to trust to begin to tell. I still need but time to know trust--to build and know trust and to learn safety.

I am sorry it took me so long to get back to you as i have been in the hospital on Sept. 18th and am just know getting back to answer. Again, thank you for answering.

camilionwords1truth
  #30  
Old Oct 10, 2007, 11:44 AM
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darkpurplesecrets darkpurplesecrets is offline
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((((swedish))))

Thank you for reaching out, it meant more than you know. I was hospitalized on Sept. 18th so I am just getting back to answering.

camilionwords1truth
  #31  
Old Oct 10, 2007, 12:12 PM
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darkpurplesecrets darkpurplesecrets is offline
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((((((Tymberwolv))))))

Thank you for your answer to my post. This was the first time I dared to share any part of my life anywhere. I have to be honest I am terrified. I was told never to tell.

I am no different than the next person, we all have have our story and this is mine. But mine is not over yet. Things are still out there.

But your post touched me. Thank you for caring. I picked up and left a very bad situation so that I could maybe live. I drove all across US to a Northern State to start over hopefully in safety.

I have family praying that God will take my life within an inch of it if that is what it takes to bring me back to where they think I should be.

I do not feel safe. I do not know if God loves me. I have made so many professions of faith because things never got any better and I thought God never heard me. I quit trying finally. I got too tired. I do not know where I stand Tymber.

On Sept 18th, I was committed to 5 West, the phychiatric ward to get stable on meds. They put me on a lot of meds that I feel like a zombie on.

But thank you for caring and for reaching out. Would you do me a favor, would you pray that I will know if I am a Child of God or not? Thank you.

camilionwords1truth
  #32  
Old Oct 10, 2007, 01:32 PM
TYMBERWOLV TYMBERWOLV is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2006
Location: ARIZONA
Posts: 996
Cam,

Here is the favor I don't have to pray on that . If you have taken god as your Lord and Saviour then you will always be a child of God. The Lord says I shall never forsake you for you are my children.

Sometimes we hear what we want to hear and sometimes the silence from God is yet another trial. Or possibly you cant realize that God is listening and that he is dropping signs in front of your face.

For example who knew that when you came to PC that you would have walked into a bunch of Christians that had issues similar to yours. I will always believe that God works in mysterious ways and unanswered prayers have a reason.

Things are done in Gods timing not ours and as Christians we tend to fail to acknowledge that. God is not a microwave God or as I call it ATM take away from but never give back.

My suggestion for you my friend is to partner up with someone that is willing to walk the path with you. Endure the fire because the more you are being pulled away from Satan the more Satan pulls fights to keep you...

I heard a great qoute this last weekend :::: If Satan cant touch you spiritually he will make you busy.

explanantion is that the more tired/ exhausted we beome the more less we are to stay in worship with God .... Joyce Meyers has a book called Battlefield of the Mind.... Try to read it it gives you the skills not only to triumph the battles but to control the mind to limit the attacks


T
  #33  
Old Oct 10, 2007, 02:14 PM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
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(((((((((((((((( camilion )))))))))))))))
Is someone out there--does anyone care  (very triggiering)...... Is someone out there--does anyone care  (very triggiering)...... Is someone out there--does anyone care  (very triggiering)......

love,
Fuzzy
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  #34  
Old Oct 19, 2007, 08:47 PM
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1oxbowgirl 1oxbowgirl is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2007
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 933
Camilion,
I read your story and I can understand your fear of writing it and how hard it must have been for you. I enjoy chatting with you and consider you a special on-line friend. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, and just know I am always here if you need someone to talk to, or just someone to listen. You can PM me anytime. Is someone out there--does anyone care  (very triggiering)......
__________________
All my life I have know that I am different. I have trouble with my thinking and processing information. I have trouble in keeping close friends. I am afraid of living, and I don't really know why. I am good at pretending everything is all right, by just gritting my teeth and just charging ahead and getting through the rough spots, but inside I am afraid of failure and getting critized for things I do. I am hoping someone can help me, or at least understand me.
  #35  
Old Oct 23, 2007, 11:37 PM
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wickedwings wickedwings is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2007
Location: Pennsylvania, U.S.
Posts: 1,004
cam (((safe hugs))) sorry i didn't get to this thread until now. you are an incredible brave girl. i was touched by your story. i wish the best for you, cam. i hear you. my deaf ears help me hear with clarity. it took so much courage for you to tell your story. i'm proud of you for breaking the code of silence. it's a path toward healing. i know it's not easy. we are here for you, though. always.
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