is this a warning sign ?

He has hurt one of my fingers he slammed the laptop down on it using phone unsure if its my fault think i need help

I think he already passed the "warning signs." I agree with others that this is abuse. I want to say go to couple's counseling but he may get defensive... I think you should tell your family and/or his family. I agree with nicoleflynn that you should definitely contact the abuse hotline.

Please do not blame yourself. He is violent. You need to get help and you need to get away from him. PLEASE take care of yourself and get out of this relationship. It will only get worse.

You should NEVER go into couples counseling with an abuser; they need help all by themselves. Abuse is a choice, and most abusers don't think they have a problem and will blame the victim.

Well he's violent and has grabbed you hard and slammed a laptop on your fingers so that's already abusive. Breaking things and punching walls etc is considered emotionally abusive, because it sends the message that "this is what I'm capable of doing to you" and "this represents what I want to direct at you." Being controlling is abusive too. So yes, these are huge red flags and he's already passed all the warning signs straight into actual abuse. Your rocking back and forth and the shock.. it's clear you are currently being traumatised. Please seek help and try to remove yourself from the situation and the relationship. Can you afford to live on your own or stay with a friend/family member?

its getting worse ...i am scared