Being sa by children as children vs children being sa by adults

Rive1976 · Mar 24, 2018 at 02:35 PM

Do you think this makes a difference? Also how do you know whats abuse between children if same age?

Mar 24, 2018 at 02:38 PM

I had something happen to me as a kid, by a couple of other kids my age. Honestly, I think it would have been worse if it had been by an adult. Perhaps because adults tend to have a lot more control and can feel more threatening? I'm not 100% sure, it's just a gut feeling.

Interesting question though!

SorryShaped · Mar 24, 2018 at 04:11 PM

I don't have a comparison in my life, but it made me distrust everyone, especially kids (which were my assaulters), and that really hurt my relationships with my kids.

Rive1976 · Mar 24, 2018 at 07:29 PM

Sorryshaped were the your age?

magicalprince · Mar 25, 2018 at 01:06 AM

It's hard to say, each person's experience is subjective in how it affects them. Rather than what you classify or don't classify as abuse it's more important to look at how it feels and what impact it has had on your life.

Amyjay · Mar 25, 2018 at 01:53 AM

I was sa'ed by both children (legally) and adults. In my case what mattered most was the degree of relationship I had with each perpetrator rather than their age.

Rive1976 · Mar 25, 2018 at 10:22 AM

Amyjay were they same age peers?

SorryShaped · Mar 25, 2018 at 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dnester

Sorryshaped were the your age?

I answered that in another post, but slightly older and one younger. I was 7-8

Amyjay · Mar 25, 2018 at 11:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dnester

Amyjay were they same age peers?

No, one was 7 years older, two were 4 years older.

Rive1976 · Mar 25, 2018 at 12:32 PM

Oh ok im sorry

DP_2017 · Mar 26, 2018 at 09:27 PM

I'm not sure if I ever had SA, but I hate being touched... I do know there was a few issues where I was naked with boys, but they were my age and we were young, not sure if it was normal curiosity type stuff or actual abuse.... I feel there is something wrong with me but I can't connect the dots.

Rive1976 · Mar 26, 2018 at 09:35 PM

DP 2017
I dont remember any sexual abuse by adults but I do remember some incidents with peers. I became very sexualized having oral sex with dolls drawing privates on dolls. I cant forgive me for this because i dont know where it came from and even then i couldnt.

SorryShaped · Mar 26, 2018 at 09:40 PM

I think drawing rude bits on dolls and toys is fairly normal. It sure was the normal around here. I even did it when I worked at a Walmart, on the returned ones. They were going to be destroyed anyway for being defective.

Rive1976 · Mar 26, 2018 at 09:42 PM

Lol Sorryshaped my mom didnt think it was. I got in big trouble.

Mar 26, 2018 at 09:46 PM

Many children do sexual things before they even realize what it is.

I began achieving orgasm at the age of 4. I had no idea what sex or any of that stuff was...just that grinding against things felt good.

It's actually more common than you'd think. Just because your mom found it odd and punished you for it (totally the wrong reaction, by the way), doesn't make her right.

Rive1976 · Mar 26, 2018 at 09:54 PM

May trigger******

Well all my problems started after a boy and me performed oral on each other. I began doing that with my dolls. Then i did something bad to an animal. I was 7 when that happened and 11 with the animal. I also humped my little sister when me and my cousin started playing the humping game. I told my mom immediately. Is all that normal?

DP_2017 · Mar 26, 2018 at 09:56 PM

see thats why I get confused... I did so many sexual thing as a kid and have been "obsessed" with sex since i was like 12 but never had actual sex or any sexual abuse that i know of and I look up stuff and it says its normal in many cases

I didn't draw on the dolls but I always wanted my barbies to have sex. i got angry my ken doll had underwear on him i couldn't remove. with the other boys my age, one was a cousin we showed each other our privates in a tree house and the other was a boy who was a family friend, kind of the same thing, only i remember he never actually showed me his, he had me go first and laughed and i was mad because he ran away and never did his part of the "Deal"

i also was obsessed with sex on tv... like... to the point for a while that was literally all i wanted to see what sex scenes on shows or i lost interest. lots of things like that i do remember as a kid... but I've blocked out vast majority of my childhood.

Mar 26, 2018 at 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dnester

May trigger******

Well all my problems started after a boy and me performed oral on each other. I began doing that with my dolls. Then i did something bad to an animal. I was 7 when that happened and 11 with the animal. I also humped my little sister when me and my cousin started playing the humping game. I told my mom immediately. Is all that normal?

I don't know details about the animal incident, but it all sounds like normal childhood experimentation. I've done a similar thing to the humping game with a childhood friend of mine, around the age of 12. The fact that you haven't continued to do sexual things to children or animals tells me that it was just part of an experimental phase.

SorryShaped · Mar 26, 2018 at 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dnester

Lol Sorryshaped my mom didnt think it was. I got in big trouble.

So did I. It didn't mean I wouldn't do it, nor did anyone else my age stop

Rive1976 · Mar 26, 2018 at 10:19 PM

Scaredandconfused
Im curious why I still have those bad thoughts though. I do fine when kids arent around when they are bad stuff pops up.

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Being sa by children as children vs children being sa by adults

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Rive1976 Grand Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: USA Posts: 1,740 6 144 hugs given	Mar 24, 2018 at 02:35 PM #1 Do you think this makes a difference? Also how do you know whats abuse between children if same age?
	Reply With Quote

Anonymous55397 Guest Posts: n/a	Mar 24, 2018 at 02:38 PM #2 I had something happen to me as a kid, by a couple of other kids my age. Honestly, I think it would have been worse if it had been by an adult. Perhaps because adults tend to have a lot more control and can feel more threatening? I'm not 100% sure, it's just a gut feeling. Interesting question though!
	Reply With Quote

SorryShaped Grand Magnate Member Since Mar 2017 Location: Kentucky Posts: 3,273 7	Mar 24, 2018 at 04:11 PM #3 I don't have a comparison in my life, but it made me distrust everyone, especially kids (which were my assaulters), and that really hurt my relationships with my kids.
	Reply With Quote

Rive1976 Grand Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: USA Posts: 1,740 6 144 hugs given	Mar 24, 2018 at 07:29 PM #4 Sorryshaped were the your age?
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magicalprince Veteran Member Member Since Dec 2014 Location: US Posts: 639 9 106 hugs given	Mar 25, 2018 at 01:06 AM #5 It's hard to say, each person's experience is subjective in how it affects them. Rather than what you classify or don't classify as abuse it's more important to look at how it feels and what impact it has had on your life.
	Reply With Quote

Amyjay Magnate Member Since Mar 2017 Location: Underground Posts: 2,439 7 692 hugs given	Mar 25, 2018 at 01:53 AM #6 I was sa'ed by both children (legally) and adults. In my case what mattered most was the degree of relationship I had with each perpetrator rather than their age.
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Rive1976 Grand Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: USA Posts: 1,740 6 144 hugs given	Mar 25, 2018 at 10:22 AM #7 Amyjay were they same age peers?
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Rive1976 Grand Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: USA Posts: 1,740 6 144 hugs given	Mar 25, 2018 at 12:32 PM #10 Oh ok im sorry
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DP_2017 Grand Magnate Member Since Aug 2017 Location: A house Posts: 4,414 6 665 hugs given	Mar 26, 2018 at 09:27 PM #11 I'm not sure if I ever had SA, but I hate being touched... I do know there was a few issues where I was naked with boys, but they were my age and we were young, not sure if it was normal curiosity type stuff or actual abuse.... I feel there is something wrong with me but I can't connect the dots.
	Reply With Quote

Rive1976 Grand Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: USA Posts: 1,740 6 144 hugs given	Mar 26, 2018 at 09:35 PM #12 DP 2017 I dont remember any sexual abuse by adults but I do remember some incidents with peers. I became very sexualized having oral sex with dolls drawing privates on dolls. I cant forgive me for this because i dont know where it came from and even then i couldnt.
	Reply With Quote

SorryShaped Grand Magnate Member Since Mar 2017 Location: Kentucky Posts: 3,273 7	Mar 26, 2018 at 09:40 PM #13 I think drawing rude bits on dolls and toys is fairly normal. It sure was the normal around here. I even did it when I worked at a Walmart, on the returned ones. They were going to be destroyed anyway for being defective.
	Reply With Quote

Rive1976 Grand Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: USA Posts: 1,740 6 144 hugs given	Mar 26, 2018 at 09:42 PM #14 Lol Sorryshaped my mom didnt think it was. I got in big trouble.
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Rive1976 Grand Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: USA Posts: 1,740 6 144 hugs given	Mar 26, 2018 at 09:54 PM #16 May trigger****** Well all my problems started after a boy and me performed oral on each other. I began doing that with my dolls. Then i did something bad to an animal. I was 7 when that happened and 11 with the animal. I also humped my little sister when me and my cousin started playing the humping game. I told my mom immediately. Is all that normal?
	Reply With Quote

Rive1976 Grand Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: USA Posts: 1,740 6 144 hugs given	Mar 26, 2018 at 10:19 PM #20 Scaredandconfused Im curious why I still have those bad thoughts though. I do fine when kids arent around when they are bad stuff pops up.
	Reply With Quote