Being sa by children as children vs children being sa by adults

Do you think this makes a difference? Also how do you know whats abuse between children if same age?

I had something happen to me as a kid, by a couple of other kids my age. Honestly, I think it would have been worse if it had been by an adult. Perhaps because adults tend to have a lot more control and can feel more threatening? I'm not 100% sure, it's just a gut feeling. Interesting question though!

I don't have a comparison in my life, but it made me distrust everyone, especially kids (which were my assaulters), and that really hurt my relationships with my kids.

Sorryshaped were the your age?

It's hard to say, each person's experience is subjective in how it affects them. Rather than what you classify or don't classify as abuse it's more important to look at how it feels and what impact it has had on your life.

I was sa'ed by both children (legally) and adults. In my case what mattered most was the degree of relationship I had with each perpetrator rather than their age.

Amyjay were they same age peers?

I answered that in another post, but slightly older and one younger. I was 7-8

No, one was 7 years older, two were 4 years older.

Oh ok im sorry

I'm not sure if I ever had SA, but I hate being touched... I do know there was a few issues where I was naked with boys, but they were my age and we were young, not sure if it was normal curiosity type stuff or actual abuse.... I feel there is something wrong with me but I can't connect the dots.

DP 2017
I dont remember any sexual abuse by adults but I do remember some incidents with peers. I became very sexualized having oral sex with dolls drawing privates on dolls. I cant forgive me for this because i dont know where it came from and even then i couldnt.

I think drawing rude bits on dolls and toys is fairly normal. It sure was the normal around here. I even did it when I worked at a Walmart, on the returned ones. They were going to be destroyed anyway for being defective.

Lol Sorryshaped my mom didnt think it was. I got in big trouble.

Many children do sexual things before they even realize what it is.

I began achieving orgasm at the age of 4. I had no idea what sex or any of that stuff was...just that grinding against things felt good. It's actually more common than you'd think. Just because your mom found it odd and punished you for it (totally the wrong reaction, by the way), doesn't make her right.

May trigger******


Well all my problems started after a boy and me performed oral on each other. I began doing that with my dolls. Then i did something bad to an animal. I was 7 when that happened and 11 with the animal. I also humped my little sister when me and my cousin started playing the humping game. I told my mom immediately. Is all that normal?

see thats why I get confused... I did so many sexual thing as a kid and have been "obsessed" with sex since i was like 12 but never had actual sex or any sexual abuse that i know of and I look up stuff and it says its normal in many cases

I didn't draw on the dolls but I always wanted my barbies to have sex. i got angry my ken doll had underwear on him i couldn't remove. with the other boys my age, one was a cousin we showed each other our privates in a tree house and the other was a boy who was a family friend, kind of the same thing, only i remember he never actually showed me his, he had me go first and laughed and i was mad because he ran away and never did his part of the "Deal"

i also was obsessed with sex on tv... like... to the point for a while that was literally all i wanted to see what sex scenes on shows or i lost interest. lots of things like that i do remember as a kid... but I've blocked out vast majority of my childhood.

I don't know details about the animal incident, but it all sounds like normal childhood experimentation. I've done a similar thing to the humping game with a childhood friend of mine, around the age of 12. The fact that you haven't continued to do sexual things to children or animals tells me that it was just part of an experimental phase.

So did I. It didn't mean I wouldn't do it, nor did anyone else my age stop

Scaredandconfused
Im curious why I still have those bad thoughts though. I do fine when kids arent around when they are bad stuff pops up.

And my sister was three I was 11.

Seeing part of your fear can be a trigger. When I used to struggle with homicidal OCD, for example, knives would be a trigger. When I wasn't around any trigger objects, the thoughts were -usually- not as bad. Likewise, someone with pedophilia OCD may be triggered by seeing/hearing children.

These past experiences you have had as a child that are normal, but were made a big deal out of by your mother, could have also been part of what led to you developing POCD in the first place. Our anxious brains are quite good at finding what frightens us most, and amplifying it.

I agree with what you are saying but wasnt it bad my sister was 3 and I was 11? I have a therapist and she says she doesnt know how I got like this. She doesnt have a crystal ball. That doesnt help me.

Childhood is the age of much experimentation. Let me tell you something I did, at the age of around 9-10.

I began having online cyber sex with guys online. I would lie and say I was 18. I didn't even fully understand sex, but I would chat with these people (never video) and masturbate. My dad eventually caught me and I was grounded from the computer for a year. I didn't do it again after.

We all do things that we look back on and remember with some shame, but that is very human I think. We all go through a very normal period of experimentation, I think it is a part of growing up.

These same things I did are carrying over to my adulthood though. No I dont act like I did when I was little. I dont act because I dont want to hurt anyone but the thoughts wont go away. I am triggered alot and have impulses. They wont stop but are less than when Im not around kids. I mean and it doesnt even make sense. Like I heard a sa story on a tv show we have here and immediately had the impulse to touch the dog innapropriately. I didnt but the compulsion was there. I have been this way since 8 years of age and hearing the therapist say idk why gives me no hope.