[Depressed-Fiance]

I was discarded by my ex fiance (female) in the most abrupt & hurtful way one year ago.

I'm a male who still feels rather emotionally raw and hurt but trying to move on and this website DOES help massively.

Just last week she sent me a Facebook Messenger chat request trying to connect with me (under a different surname and I think she created a new account since I blocked her.)

I was able to see a snippet of the message without opening it. It simply said 'Hi, how are you?' I didn't respond to the message but I suspect it is Narcissistic Hoovering.

Does anyone else think she was hoovering and why do Narcissists do this even when they make it clear they don't want you in their life anymore?

Is there a limit to how many times they will hoover?

Thank you for any help.

[healingme4me]

Trying to get back together after being abusive is a form of hoovering.

I cannot answer why she's trying to get back in contact after causing you pain, since trying to guess motives of others without their input isn't conducive to healing from toxicity.

Ignoring her seems a good choice.

Creating new false accounts for reaching out to you seems alarming in and of itself.

[Depressed-Fiance]

Thank you so much for getting back to me and sharing your helpful and valuable advice.

Much appreciated.