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Wise Elder
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#21
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Lilfae
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Bill3, MrMoose
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,712
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#22
Last edited by Buffy01; Sep 26, 2018 at 09:15 PM.. Reason: Misspell a word |
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MrMoose
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Wise Elder
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Location: USA
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#23
Because I didn't scream!.
Because I didn't yell no! Because I didn't scream stop! Because no one believe me Because it was someone I knew and I was adult myself! |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
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#24
I will keep that in mind! Great advice!
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Wise Elder
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#25
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88Butterfly88, MrMoose
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Wise Elder
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#26
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Wisest Elder Ever
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#27
__________________ |
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Buffy01
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#28
I reported and no one would help anyway.
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Underground
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#29
I was 3, I was 5 , I was 10, I was 18. I was all the ages in between.
I did report. I was told to shut up. I did report. I was told I was lying. I did report. I was told I would it would kill my mother, kill my father, destroy my family. I did report. I was taken away from my home, blamed for the destruction. I did report. I was told I was crazy, threatened with being locked up. I did report. The social workers didn't believe me. The therapist didn't believe me. I did report. I was branded a liar, a home breaker, disturbed, crazy. I did report. I was returned to the abusers care by the state anyway. I stopped reporting. Do you know what NOBODY did? Nobody cared. Nobody believed. Nobody comforted. Nobody reassured. Nobody listened. Nobody protected. |
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#30
One was an authorities son. I knew I wouldn't be believed.
One was a Social workers son. I didn't want to rake Myself over the coals I knew it would be he says she says case in court |
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BettysGranddaughter
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#31
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Buffy01
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#32
Because I didn't understand what was happening, what to call it
Because I was ashamed Because I thought it was my fault Because I felt mean for not wanting him, and like I had deceived him Because I thought I was supposed to like it Because I would have to admit it to myself, and loose whatever self respect I had Because I was this tough kid, and if anyone in school found out, I would be free game Because I didn't know it was illegal I've reported him now, though, 19 years later. Nothing will ever happen to him, but at least my story will forever be in the police files, as will his name. |
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Buffy01
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#33
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
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#34
Quote:
I think I am just trying to mull all of this over. I only ever see one little part of the abuse at a time. But put together it does seem to be quite a lot. |
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Buffy01
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Member Since Oct 2018
Location: In an Invisible Indestructible Unremovable Box.
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#35
Because he was my Dad and I was 3, so I must have been confused or mis-remembered.
Because my Mom, the enabler, said she was 'always watching', except that later she told me that she was too depressed to watch and that she often was asleep and that she didn't really know. Because I tried to really believe that Dad walking in on me in the bathrooms so much was really a mistake or an accident. Because I was a child and told not to speak out. Because saying anything against my parents as a child was un-Christian. Because saying anything against a male as a woman was un-Christian. Because he was 'just trying to comfort me from a panic attack'. Because I didn't feel like I was worth it anyways. Because I was scared of wrongfully accusing someone, and I didn't really understand proper boundaries thanks to my childhood. Because my Mom told me that going into 'the system' would get me and my siblings beaten, raped, and worse - worse than how things were already in my house apparently. Because my teachers told me how much I could say before they would make a formal record. Because I was scared of being 'that girl' all over again; I had already been 'that weird sad girl' when my brother died and it felt like being alone on an island. Because I wanted to be normal. Because I had good grades and did well in school, so it must not be affecting me, right? Because a social worker touched my privates when I had told her no, so clearly this was okay. Because I didn't matter to my parents, to the church (that I found out knew about my abuse), or to other adults that heard me. Because as long as I went to school and didn't do anything wrong, I was 'fine'. Because I didn't want to hurt my sister. Because I would hurt my brother's chances at being a good Christian pastor, according to my family. These are some of my reasons, at least the ones that I could think of and type without feeling too nauseous. |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,712
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#36
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,712
(SuperPoster!)
6 9,844 hugs
given |
#37
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Lilfae
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Lilfae
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,712
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#38
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,712
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6 9,844 hugs
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#39
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CatLover007
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#40
Because I didn't want to believe I was assaulted twice, by two separate people, on the same day.
Because I never should've let a stranger drive me home Because even though I said "I don't want anything sexual," I let him keep flirting Because when he [ trigger ]stopped the car next to an empty field and stuck his fingers inside me[ /trigger ], I froze up instead of fighting him off Because I was wearing lacy lingerie, so I must've wanted it Because [ trigger ]he made me come[ /trigger ], and he knew it Because I eventually consented to [ trigger ]give him head[ /trigger ] out of fear he would hurt me if I didn't (though he pushed me further anyway) Because I thought "it was more coercive than nonconsensual" Because I didn't want to have to explain the rest of my recent sex life to the police Because by the time I realized I had been violated and wasn't just freaking out about nothing, I had already blocked his messages and forgotten his name Because he was supposed to be my friend Because we had already been kissing Because I wasn't sure that "I'm not comfortable with you [doing the specific thing he started doing two seconds later]" was an explicit enough no Because how was I the victim [ trigger ]if he went down on me[ /trigger ]? Because once I realized it was assault, it was two weeks before he was supposed to leave for Europe Because he was really popular in my college dance scene and I thought the organizers wouldn't believe me and everyone would hate me Because I didn't want to "ruin his life" Because my own mother told me that letting him into my room was implicit consent |
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