Narcissist encounter

TishaBuv · Mar 18, 2019 at 10:29 AM

My observation is that styles of desirable behavior have changed for courting/mating rituals today. Now this guy is 60, so he is my contemporary. I’m in my early 50’s.

In my single days of dating, there were men, especially Hispanic, Italian, ethnic, etc... They were very take charge assertive. I’m not sure how that machismo would be viewed today. The behavior you described with this guy was a bit of that old school swagger IMHO.

Also, how he backpeddled to say he was only interested online, strikes me as his way of avoiding some awkward rejection scenario with you. Those mixed messages were because one of you wasn’t attracted. Or, he’s just being a player who wants to try to set you up for being his back up plan. Good you didn’t let him!

Mar 18, 2019 at 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

My observation is that styles of desirable behavior have changed for courting/mating rituals today. Now this guy is 60, so he is my contemporary. I’m in my early 50’s.

In my single days of dating, there were men, especially Hispanic, Italian, ethnic, etc... They were very take charge assertive. I’m not sure how that machismo would be viewed today. The behavior you described with this guy was a bit of that old school swagger IMHO.

Also, how he backpeddled to say he was only interested online, strikes me as his way of avoiding some awkward rejection scenario with you. Those mixed messages were because one of you wasn’t attracted. Or, he’s just being a player who wants to try to set you up for being his back up plan. Good you didn’t let him!

Well, he definitely fits the trademarks of a narcissist, as I pointed out. I'm really shocked by how all of the posters in my thread have invalidated my research about it here. It's really disheartening to me, that no one respects my opinion even when I use research and evidence to back it up that shows I'm actually spot on about this guy. Wow.

Amazed by how everyone is defending this guy and putting me down.

Mar 18, 2019 at 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StreetcarBlanche

Well, he definitely fits the trademarks of a narcissist, as I pointed out. I'm really shocked by how all of the posters in my thread have invalidated my research about it here. It's really disheartening to me, that no one respects my opinion even when I use research and evidence to back it up that shows I'm actually spot on about this guy. Wow.

Amazed by how everyone is defending this guy and putting me down.

I had not read the entire thread StreetcarBlanche. I am sorry that you are feeling disheartened and invalidated.

Those are not nice feelings at all. How can we help you here on PC? Sometimes, especially with the online limitations, people need to give us a pointer or two on the right type of support for them. Everyone is different. What do you need from us StreetcarBlanche in order to feel supported?

Mar 18, 2019 at 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SilverTrees

I had not read the entire thread StreetcarBlanche. I am sorry that you are feeling disheartened and invalidated.

Those are not nice feelings at all. How can we help you here on PC? Sometimes, especially with the online limitations, people need to give us a pointer or two on the right type of support for them. Everyone is different. What do you need from us StreetcarBlanche in order to feel supported?

I was hoping to hear from others who've dated narcissists or interacted with them as friends, coworkers, family members, etc. Narcissism is not a trend, it's a reality. And the posters who responded on my thread completely ignored my post where I directly link the guy's behavior to narcissistic traits, and ignore the link to the article that explains narcissistic traits in people in general.

It seems like with these forums, people tend to disregard what the thread starter is asking and don't directly respond to that as has happened with my thread.

I don't need dating advice. I don't need to be told to go to therapy. What I hoped for, was a conversation with other posters about narcissism. But that's not what I received here.

If anyone has direct experience with narcissists and is interested in responding to my thread, that's what I am looking for.

Mar 18, 2019 at 01:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StreetcarBlanche

I was hoping to hear from others who've dated narcissists or interacted with them as friends, coworkers, family members, etc. Narcissism is not a trend, it's a reality. And the posters who responded on my thread completely ignored my post where I directly link the guy's behavior to narcissistic traits, and ignore the link to the article that explains narcissistic traits in people in general.

It seems like with these forums, people tend to disregard what the thread starter is asking and don't directly respond to that as has happened with my thread.

I don't need dating advice. I don't need to be told to go to therapy. What I hoped for, was a conversation with other posters about narcissism. But that's not what I received here.

If anyone has direct experience with narcissists and is interested in responding to my thread, that's what I am looking for.

Thank you very much for clarifying that StreetCarBlanche. I apologize for my unhelpful post. I know very little about narcissism so I don't think I will be much help to you on your thread here. I will refrain from posting again. I wish you peace. Best wishes with your exploration of narcissism.

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