[Abusedbysister]

I realized from a couple of friends’ posts that today (August 4th) is a Sister’s Day in Canada and the US. I never heard of it before and wish didn’t see their happy messages on Facebook. Their happy messages triggered anxiety in me as it reminded me of all the things that my sister used to do to me. I am not seeing my T for another week.

People don’t realize how scary it is to live with an abusive sibling since the victim lives with the sibling constantly and you have no where to escape. If I went home and my parents were out, I knew she would beat the crap out of me and then bully me. If she had friends over, I knew she would beat me up in front of them to show them who was the boss. If my cousins were over or we were at their house, she would beat me up. People thought it was funny as I was the brother and she was the sister, which made me feel very inadequate and embarrassed.

I try not to see her these days but have to see her few times a year for family functions. When I see her, I am still scared of her. It has been many years since I got my last beating , but I still watch everything I say in front of her to make sure I don’t offend her. I have worked with my T on how to say no her but everything goes out the door when I see her.

Hope others have a better Sunday!

[downandlonely]

I'm sorry for what you went through. My brother verbally abused me, and I haven't really got over it yet either.

Any chance you could get on a cancellation list so you could see your T earlier? Sounds like this day is very triggering for you.

[Abusedbysister]

Originally Posted by downandlonely

I'm sorry for what you went through. My brother verbally abused me, and I haven't really got over it yet either.

Any chance you could get on a cancellation list so you could see your T earlier? Sounds like this day is very triggering for you.

Thanks for this. My T is actually on holiday. I have taken some anxiety medication that makes things more manageable!

[Open Eyes]

I am sorry your sister is mean to you. I can't be around my older sister because she has been too mean and bossy and controlling with me. I don't like how I FEEL when around her either. My sister has said lies about me and has behaved so badly towards me at different times, even on the phone that I don't want anything to do with her anymore. It's not just me that feels this way about her either though.

I am glad I did not see this thread so I did not have to think about yesterday being sister's day. The less I think about her the better.

[MrsA]

Originally Posted by Abusedbysister

I realized from a couple of friends’ posts that today (August 4th) is a Sister’s Day in Canada and the US. I never heard of it before and wish didn’t see their happy messages on Facebook. Their happy messages triggered anxiety in me as it reminded me of all the things that my sister used to do to me. I am not seeing my T for another week.

I know how you feel. I have a rotten older sister too and I hate it when people go on Facebook to brag about how grateful they are for their families. It always feels like they're judging you for not faking positivity. Once I got stuck at a church event where the person in charge tried to make me express appreciation for my sister and I just refused. They wouldn't move on and kept pressuring me to talk about my sister and acting as if I had done something bad.

I didn't know there was a sister's day. I thought the public displays of superior grattitude on Thanksgiving was enough ego stroking for the pious. And while I'm sorry that your sister gave you such a bad time, I also feel better knowing it didn't just happen to me. And don't stress about posting on Facebook for Sister's Day. Facebook socialites are probably too busy counting their likes to notice whether other people are posting anything.

I know how awful it is when bad memories are triggered. Sometimes they last for years and you keep feeling the injustice that your sister was never punished. Just remember that her actions proved that she is a stupid and inferior person and that deep down she knows it and will always worry that people will find out she's a bully. You can go through life knowing you're not a worthless bully.

[Mendingmysoul]

In my case it is my younger sister.She is the golden child for my mom.Early on she caught up the fact that my mom hated me.She took advantage of the fact.She always told lies to mom about me.I got beat up pretty bad by mom who wanted some reason to beat me up.My other sister would back up her in the lie.So my mom refused to listen to me saying why both of your sisters would lie.My entire childhood was very abusive in a narcissistic dynamic.I was scared of a younger sister.When she wanted to have some fun,she used to tell me beforehand that today she is going to make sure I got a good beatup.I used to shake with fear imagining how bad it's gonna be. AND she used to grin.

[Abusedbysister]

Originally Posted by Mendingmysoul

In my case it is my younger sister.She is the golden child for my mom.Early on she caught up the fact that my mom hated me.She took advantage of the fact.She always told lies to mom about me.I got beat up pretty bad by mom who wanted some reason to beat me up.My other sister would back up her in the lie.So my mom refused to listen to me saying why both of your sisters would lie.My entire childhood was very abusive in a narcissistic dynamic.I was scared of a younger sister.When she wanted to have some fun,she used to tell me beforehand that today she is going to make sure I got a good beatup.I used to shake with fear imagining how bad it's gonna be. AND she used to grin.

Thanks for this as I think we had very similar experience. She used to tell me that I was going to get a good beat up when my parents were going to be out, and for sure she delivered. Mine was a younger sister too which made it extremely embarrassing for me as a brother. I still remember her grin when she was making the threats and her smile when she was beating me up.

[Abusedbysister]

Originally Posted by MrsA

I know how you feel. I have a rotten older sister too and I hate it when people go on Facebook to brag about how grateful they are for their families. It always feels like they're judging you for not faking positivity. Once I got stuck at a church event where the person in charge tried to make me express appreciation for my sister and I just refused. They wouldn't move on and kept pressuring me to talk about my sister and acting as if I had done something bad.

I didn't know there was a sister's day. I thought the public displays of superior grattitude on Thanksgiving was enough ego stroking for the pious. And while I'm sorry that your sister gave you such a bad time, I also feel better knowing it didn't just happen to me. And don't stress about posting on Facebook for Sister's Day. Facebook socialites are probably too busy counting their likes to notice whether other people are posting anything.

I know how awful it is when bad memories are triggered. Sometimes they last for years and you keep feeling the injustice that your sister was never punished. Just remember that her actions proved that she is a stupid and inferior person and that deep down she knows it and will always worry that people will find out she's a bully. You can go through life knowing you're not a worthless bully.

Thanks for this! You are definitely not the only one!

[Mendingmysoul]

I know how that feels.So sorry you had to endure all that.I just wonder how a sibling could do this to her own sibling.Were you able to explain yourself to your parents ?Did they turn a deaf ear to you? It is really awful to have such a sibling specially a younger one.It messes up our psyche.

[Abusedbysister]

Originally Posted by Mendingmysoul

I know how that feels.So sorry you had to endure all that.I just wonder how a sibling could do this to her own sibling.Were you able to explain yourself to your parents ?Did they turn a deaf ear to you? It is really awful to have such a sibling specially a younger one.It messes up our psyche.

I think those of us who get such siblings are so unlucky. I tried to explain it to my parents, but they were from Italian backgrounds with the view that guys had to be guys and girls had to be girls, and they blamed me for losing fights to her. They would say things like, “how could you lose a fight to a girl, you are the older brother,” and so on, which made me feel a lot worse and made me feel inadequate growing up. My self-esteem was very low growing up and is still low although better now.

[Mendingmysoul]

What a cr..py situation.How irresponsible of them to explain like that.Girls who should be girls don't beat up younger brothers.They should be loving and nurturing. Hmmm.hypocrisy at its best.I know it is hard but try to heal from the trauma it has created in your psyche.And trust me I know how it is as I am walking the same path.

[Mendingmysoul]

Sent you a pm.I am kind of new here and trying to learn maneuver the website.I am unable to open my sent messages .

[Abusedbysister]

Originally Posted by Mendingmysoul

Sent you a pm.I am kind of new here and trying to learn maneuver the website.I am unable to open my sent messages .

Thanks! Just replied!