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#1
Jun 15, 2020, 12:31 AM
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I do want to apologize and hope this won't be offensive or problematic. But I had to get it off my chest.
(Upsetting and dark poem. I by no means meant to demean survivors of rape, this was my pain I felt with my ****** marriage I’m in right now) Dear beloved, I hate you. For many years, you humiliated me For many years, you dehumanized me You’ve treated me like **** for years Dear beloved, I hate you I wish we’ve never met. I tried to get away, but you won’t let go. Not out of love, but out of need to control Just violate me and be done with It! Dear beloved, I hate you This marriage was pointless This relationship wasn’t love You’ve drained me of life, money and sanity. Just be done with it and violate me! Dear beloved, I hate you. You’ve always complained nonstop for years! You slammed and caused me anxiety, I begged you to stop! But you never listen, you think you’re justified! You demand I do something about everything you hate! Dear beloved, I hate you! Never had I felt affection from you for years! Never had felt wanted! Instead you used me and abused me! I cannot speak without you debasing my pain! Dear beloved, I hate you! You have violated me! I’m averse to affection now. I’m averse to sex now. I want no one to touch me! Dear beloved, I hate you! You never loved me You never apologized You never think about how you’re hurting me! No, it’s all about you! Dear beloved, I hate you!! You’ve already destroyed me. I cannot speak I cannot be free I live in a nightmare you created for me. Dear beloved, I hate you!! I rather suffer pain and trauma Which would be preferable. I already suffer because of you. I truly loved being married to a monster!
__________________
https://www.youtube.com/user/BiFriday |
 Abusedbysister, divine1966
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 Abusedbysister, childofchaos831, guy1111, MrMoose, shovelhead
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#2
Jun 15, 2020, 08:28 PM
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FridayT, I love the poem. It hit home for us. We weren't married to him, he was a boyfriend, but those feelings... This could have been something we had written then...
Please be safe, okay?
__________________
 Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
| FridayT
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| FridayT, guy1111
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#3
Jun 17, 2020, 01:19 AM
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Dear FridayT
The poem was not unnecessary at all. I spent many a night staying on my couch posting here in the dark of the night ... when she fell asleep and the chaos was done for the day. I’m free now, as is my younger daughter, but it took a couple of years. I hope you can escape and get back to your life again. My hurt boils down to this: I expected to be part of a vital, loving, stable partnership with this woman; in the end I realized that she could never have a true partner with a voice and needs and likes and dislikes—that was never what she needed or wanted or even was capable of having. Your poem just describes our relationship per fect ly |
| FridayT
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| FridayT, guy1111
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#4
Jun 26, 2020, 10:10 AM
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Thank you for your poem.
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| FridayT
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| FridayT
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#5
Jun 27, 2020, 10:28 AM
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 Thank you for the poem. I enjoyed reading it. I like to write something like this for my sister.
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| FridayT
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| FridayT
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| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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