[WonderSun]

Totally saddens me to post that I belong here, in this forum. I really hate it! I wish I didn’t 😔 Maybe as I feel more comfortable I’ll start to share more about myself. All I can say is multiple traumas.

[Yaowen]

I have found these Forums to be a nice place. The people I have met are kindly and compassionate. I have yet to encounter anyone here who is mean-spirited or cruel. No one has ever put pressure on me. I hope that will be your experience too.

Trauma can be so brutal and life changing. I am so sorry you were the victim of multiple traumas. That is really awful. I find it incredibly difficult to reveal information about traumas I have suffered so I can definitely empathize with you.

[WonderSun]

Thank you @Yaowen I appreciate your message and hope I have that same kind of experience here too.

[Open Eyes]

“Sometimes you need to talk about something —-not to get sympathy or help, but just to kill it’s power by allowing the truth of things to hit the air”.

-Karen Salmanssohn-

[WonderSun]

Thanks @Open Eyes. Very poignant quote, so true too!

[Fuzzybear]

I'm so sorry you've experienced multiple traumas. I've found most people here to be very non judgmental and gentle. Unlike some professionals (sadly ) (I read in another post you've been dismissed and misunderstood by some professionals, I can relate. This can and does retraumatize. It does not make anyone ''bad'' or ''weak'' having been traumatized in childhood by monsters. It does not make anyone ''weak'' finding it hard to open up who has been repeatedly misjudged by ... those who enjoy judging. I'm sorry about the long post. (/rant) I hope you keep posting and find it helpful here, as I do

[WonderSun]

Thank you fuzzybear for your kind words and hugs. I agree, it does take its toll by being so misunderstood and experiencing such judgement, especially by those who are meant to be there to help, paid to even! There are times, many of them that I do feel weak, but that’s within me, from the things I’ve been told and learned as a child, to then experience the same kind of feeling now is really difficult. I feel weak because I’ve spent so long ‘trying’ to be strong and hold it all together. I feel weak because I’ve been beaten down so many times and each time I’d get back up, I’d lose another piece of me, until I was simply just a shell of a person. Outside of trauma, I have NO idea who I am. It’s become so ingrained in me, that it is me - does that make sense? Or am I just waffling on now?

It’s hard not looking at the big picture but then that terrifies me by doing so. Because it’s huge and wild and horrid and full of SO much pain. I wish it didn’t. I wish I didn’t. I wish it wasn’t mine.

Thank you again, fuzzybear

[Truth22]

I am so sorry you have experienced trauma at all let alone multiple traumas. It's the same with me so I understand.

[WonderSun]

I’m sorry you can relate, truth. Here if you ever wanna talk