[Rhapsody]

Ok - I was sitting in the bathroom when it hit me for the hundredth and one time... I hate the vaginal aspect of being a woman - men don't have a penis that comes with a slightly fishy smell from time time after one has become sexual so why should we "the female" a mans sexual counter part have to be bothered with this? - don't we have enough to worry about already.

Just a thought being shared to see how others feel on the issue of vaginal smells.

[crystalrose]

interesting i had no idea that the fishy smell only happened after you become sexually active. Why is that? The smell bothers me but only happens 2 weeks after my period. the discharge from sex sometimes smells different, not really fishy though.

[perpetuallysad]

Since we're talking about it, can you tell you are ovulating by the smell? I've gotten to where I can...just a random vaginal smell related comment.

I rarely get the fishy smell, but it freaks me the hell out when I do.

[deliquesce]

whatever word you choose to describe it, i get upset that i am self conscious about it, and that guys seem to make a big deal about it all being "fishy" down there (not me personally - i still have mah v-plates ).

[ConfusionCraze]

Um.. I can honestly say I don't have this problem.

[lynn P.]

I also don't have this problem either and if you do, you should have it checked out. It's not normal for that area to have a smell if you're clean - this would indicate a medical problem. I also find this topic to be TMI.

[Rhapsody]

Originally Posted by lynn P.

It's not normal for that area to have a smell if you're clean - this would indicate a medical problem.
I also find this topic to be TMI.

My GYN says that some women just have a stronger odor than other women and that is is perfectly normal and it often occurs after a woman has become sexual (diff fluids being mixed in there - etc) and that being clean has nothing to with it as the odor comes from with in your body.... but I do agree that if the odor is strong and or followed by any strange discharge then it should be checked out by a doctor.

FYI for ME - what is TMI?

[lynn P.]

TMI stands for 'too much information. I'm fine for almost any sexual subject, but for some reason this topic of 'fishy' smells gives me the eebie jeebies

[NuckingFutz]

TMI = too much information. Interesting topic though.

[Rhapsody]

Originally Posted by lynn P.

TMI stands for 'too much information. I'm fine for almost any sexual subject, but for some reason this topic of 'fishy' smells gives me the eebie jeebies

I understand and I felt the same way - but who am I talk to about this subject if not other women that will understand?
Its the one part of me "a female" that I hate.

[shezbut]

I think that this topic is actually rather important. To me, there seems to be a lot of shame related to sexuality.

For instance, I am embarrassed by my body. I hate the thought, the words, the sounds, scents ~ you name it ~ I hate it! It all brings on a feeling of deep shame and disgust. When I hear others put a woman's body down (or magnify it's beauty), my shame is reinforced. There are WAY to many harsh jokes out there, which have the same effect on me.

I just can't help but wonder if other women feel the exact same as I do, and therefore put a lot of distance between themselves and physical reality. Yes, there are vaginal odors. Some good, some bad. Discharge is normal. Menstruation is normal and is a good thing for those who want to have children someday ~ it means that they're healthy enough to have a baby. These are realities. Vaginal diseases are also common ~ just like heart, lung, celiac, etc. disease. There should not be shame associated with the vagina....but, there is. Just curious how common that shame is.

[lynn P.]

^^^^^
I think you made a good point Shezbutin your post and I think I know why this term bothers me. At 1st I didn't know why it bothered me. I personally don't feel shame and can talk about anything sexual. I think the reason this topic of fishy smells makes me uncomfortable is - some women and men will use this term in a derrogatory manner to put down a woman. I love being a woman and everything than comes with it and don't think we should feel shame at all. My discomfort wasn't from talking about the vagina but was related to how men percieve some women as being fishy smelling even when they're not. If a woman does smell a definate 'fishy odor' - this could be 'trichominiasis'.

Yes Rhapsody it is okay to discuss this with other women. It just kind of bothers me that men can see this forum too. No offense to you personally

[Rhapsody]

Originally Posted by lynn P.

It just kind of bothers me that men can see this forum too.

The Silver Lining... maybe in them seeing this topic they too will learn - they will learn how their fishy comments hurt us.

[deliquesce]

yes, this is a topic i would squirm about if it ever came up elsewhere, but i appreciate that it got started because in speaking about it we acknowledge the reality of our bodies - size, shape, sounds, smells etc like shezbut said.

re: the "fishy" smell thing. a few people here have suggested it's a problem and it very well could be for certain people, but it is also quite normal for a happily functioning female and i'm a bit... uncomfortable, i guess, jumping to the conclusion that just because we aren't all neutral that there is something wrong with us. kind of reinforces that shame, somehow? but i also understand why people bring it up as a possibility - because it's important to know!!

for what it's worth, all our body odours are affected by many things. hormones, hygiene, medication, general levels of activity (exercise, sex), what we eat etc. just like some people have a naturally stronger body odour and we don't medicalise that, i kind of think it would be nice to kind of acknowledge that stronger vaginal odours are also part of the "normal" range.

of course, like someone said earlier (was is raphsody?) - if there is discharge, if it is abnormal for the individual, etc then get it checked out. but if that's just your body, then it's just your body!!!

re: guys reading this. they have sex with us so they can learn to man up also and know how their perceptions about our bodies can hurt and shame us also. i can assure you that any guy (or girl!) who has anything derrogatory to say about my body will not be a guy or girl who gets into my pants.

[perpetuallysad]

Bravo, Deliquesce! You said that all so well. Same for shezbut. I know I am completely ashamed of my body. To the point to where I do not even look at myself in the mirror, like EVER. I think this is a great topic and me even getting myself to post on it was a great step for me. And I think this is all very healthy to talk about. shezbut, you especially helped me and I am happy how lynn talked about it just being something that made her uncomfortable because the overall perception of a "fishy" smell is so negative. You gals really do so much for me by expressing yourselves so fully.

[lynn P.]

I agree the communication here has been awesome. At first I had no idea why I was 'put off' by the word 'fishy' and I knew it wasn't because I'm uncomfortable talking about sex. In fact I got an A+ in human sexuality in University. I also have two daughters, the oldest 12 and I've already talked to her about sex and she's knows I'm an open book. I didn't realize until Shezbut wrote her post and something clicked - I realized it was related to the negative connection. I don't think we should ever be ashamed with our bodies and I feel sad that some women can't look at themselves in the mirror. BTW some may know this already - eating yogurt or taking probiotic supplements are great for keeping the right balance in the vagina.

[notz]

Oh wait.........the smell changes over the course of your life!!!!!!!!! (well, it has for me)

It really changed after my hysterectomy, not a bad smell, just different. My gyn assures me it's normal.

My biggest complaint has always been the inconvenience of having to sit to pee.

[NuckingFutz]

I know how to pee standing up!

[notz]

Oh Lord, do tell!!!!!

I hate being in the car then wanting to go to the loo ! Men just whip it out and go we have to find a flaming toilet ! So annoying especially when trying to get kids clean so easy with little boys.

[Typo]

I hate my very irregular menstrual cycle! I wouldn't have a complaint if it would just pick a time line.... okay that's a lie I would still have a compliants about the darned pms symptoms!

[sunrise]

I've been trying to think if there's one thing I dislike about being a woman, and I don't mind much. I don't mind about having to sit to pee and I have never really thought about vaginal odors before--it just goes with the territory. I guess if I had to choose one thing, it would be breasts. When I was younger, they were smaller and not a problem when I exercised. Now, after two kids and a bit of weight gain, they are much larger, and it is hard to just spontaneously run--they really jounce around and it can hurt (I feel like I'm handicapped!). If I want to go for a run, I have to plan in advance and use a jog-bra, etc. There's just no comfortable way to make a sprint for the bus or some other unplanned for run. I wonder if I lost more weight, would my breasts also go back to "normal" size (what I consider normal for me)?

[Princess Butterfly]

i wonder that.Growing up i was anorexic and very flat chested(AA).Then by a miracle i became pregnant my weight doubled and my breasts became huge and i hated them.(DD)
Now they have shrunk again but not by much.i dont feel comfortable with my breasts.I hate them.And bra's i hate bra's but would always where one if leaving the house

Do i sound odd

[perpetuallysad]

You don't sound odd at all. I HATE, HATE, HATE bras. I honestly think they give me 50% of my headaches. I hardly ever wear one at home, but I have large breasts, so I feel compelled by social norms to wear one in public...now that you mention it, I'm off to take my bra off!

[thunderbear]

Yeah men don't know how good they have it. Thy don't have to wear uncomfortable underwires to hold them things up after having kids. They don't have to worry about sitting on a public toilet to pee. They don't have to worry about vaginal odor as mentioned by Rhap. No periods and wearing tampons and diaper size pads or menopause. No painful childbirth. But one thing they do have to put up with though is when we complain about all of the above