[Crazydancinggirl87]

I'm scared to get a women only exam , I am afraid that I'll be triggred badly with past experiences iv had of being sexually harassed in school etc
And not sure what to do?

Doctor willing to talk to me before she does anything an not sure if I tell her about how difficult an possibiy triggering it could be to me do I tell her?

im not a rape victim

[Crazydancinggirl87]

so i told my therapist and she is goin to call my doctor an talk to her (thank goodness)

an my therapist will explain about the history i have with sexual harassement,etc and that to tell my doctor to be careful with me since im most likely will be triggred an will need alot of patince an help to be comferatable an at ease before,during,an after exam .

[salukigirl]

Hey CDG. How are you doing? Did your T talk to your doc? Are you having the appt. with a woman? If you feel uncomfortable, tell the doc and I'm sure she/he will be as accommodating as possible. My first time they did an ultrasound to make sure everything was fine and the tech asked me if I wanted to put the little probey thing in myself so I was more comfortable with it. Hope your appt. goes well!

[Crazydancinggirl87]

im doin soo soo and an ill hear if she has yet but she was planning on doing that talking to my doctor ,ill see at our appt if she has an what the next step is

having it with a female doc

[lynn P.]

((Crazydancinggirl87)) - is this your 1st gynecology exam? I remember the 1st time I had an exam - I felt so nervous, plus I was 18 - I don't even have any psycological history. Then I got a female doctor and this helped tremendously. Having 2 kids basically swept away all the embarrassment lol. Now when I go it's no big deal.

This is what helped me - thinking of it being totally medical. Doctors are used to dealing with body parts and this is a medical thing, not sexual. My doctor usually tells me step by step what she's doing. I'm so comfortable now that I carry on routine conversations lol.

I'm sharing my experience so you can see how my attitude changed towards this exam. As women we need to learn how to be comfortable with this exam, so we can take care of ourselves. My husband had an aunt in the Middle East who felt it was wrong and shameful to have this exam - unfortunately she ended up dying from cervical cancer, which could have been easily treated.

Try not to let what happened in the past, affect your ability to take care of your body - you don't want to give them this control. Remember this is all medical and it's just another body part to them. I hope your exam turns out positive- good luck.

[Crazydancinggirl87]

it will be my first yes

[lynn P.]

Originally Posted by Crazydancinggirl87

it will be my first yes

I wish I had someone talk to me before I had my 1st exam - it would have saved me a lot of stress. What we think in our minds, is much worse than the reality. I think it's very good that your therapy doctor spoke with the doctor who doing the exam. It's just an everyday thing for these doctors and I'm sure since they have to do this often, they don't particularly like doing this lol.

Usually they also do a breast exam which they do first. The doctor will also feel your lower tummy. It's okay to admit you're nervous and try to take some slow deep breaths. If you can control your brain, the exam itself isn't uncomfortable. When is your appointment?

[unico]

I had a lot of trouble finally getting gynecological exams. I was allowed to postpone mine for years due to having a PTSD letter written to my doctor by my psychiatrist. However, eventually I did it. I had the doctor use the smallest speculum she had (you can ask for that -- they do make really small ones). I also had a nurse holding my hand the whole time, which you could also ask for. Or you can bring someone with you to hold your hand. It is very quick. I did get my breasts and lower abdomen felt, too, like an above poster mentioned, but that did not bother me as much. Let the doctor know if you're in pain or getting anxious or upset, etc. Sometimes doctors will tell the patient step-by-step what they are doing, if that would help you (it just makes me more anxious, so I opt out of that). Good luck! And nowadays if your pap smear comes back normal twice in a row you can skip a year. That's what I did this year.

[Crazydancinggirl87]

i have my period an im goin to talk to my doctor before i schedule the exam

[JustAPixie]

What helped for me, and it was also advice I got from here, is to know that when you ask the doctor to stop, that she will stop. Having that bit of controll, knowing that you can quit anytime helps a bit. I hope it goes well, keep us posted.

Pix

[sugahorse1]

I went 6 years ago for my first one. But it was very basic and no "intrusion" - really just looking and feeling my breasts.
Now I need to schedule a "proper" exam, after 5 or 6 years of being sexually active and not having had an exam in that time period, and actually never having had a proper exam anyway.
Maybe I need to discuss this with my T too - but we have never really discussed anything of a vaguely sexual nature - especially as I don't have a history of sexual abuse.

I can understand your concerns, but try take as much as you can from the advice given above

[salukigirl]

How have things been going CDG? Have you had the appt. yet?

[Crazydancinggirl87]

I'm doing a anti depressant trial an not eating much
I'm depressed an I eat once a day
An won't make appt till im 21

[salukigirl]

If you are sexually active, and even if you're not, it's really important to have an exam before age 21. Women have a 2 to 4 times greater chance of contracting STDs, some which can cause cervical cancer, PID or other serious issues. And even if you're not sexually active, things like ovarian, cervical or other cancers can be found at your age. Not to mention they perform breast exams to check for abnormalities. I really strongly urge you to rethink waiting to get an exam. We have worked extremely hard to allow women access to this kind of health care and it's very important that you take advantage of it.

[Crazydancinggirl87]

My doctor herself told me I can postpone it till age 21

[salukigirl]

Well I really hope you reconsider but wish you luck with everything. Please keep us up to date. Good luck with that study you're doing. Hope you can get some help.

[Crazydancinggirl87]

Originally Posted by salukigirl

Well I really hope you reconsider but wish you luck with everything. Please keep us up to date. Good luck with that study you're doing. Hope you can get some help.

Alright i will and my therapist talked with my doctor

an thanks for the help i truly apperciate it alot
it really helped

im having a woman doc do the exam an havin exam at age 21