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Member
Member Since Feb 2007
Location: NYC
Posts: 260
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May 16, 2007 at 04:27 PM
#1
Okay, so story made short there is this guy (who happens to be 4 years older than me) who has taken a liking to me. Unfortunately he is really into the whole "relationship" thing and he's really serious about finding "the one". I, on the other hand, don't like to be tied down. And frankly, at the moment i'm not even that into dating at all. I have my own life to attend to...I told him all of this and he seemed to understand it but now his actions make me think otherwise.
Today he sent me half a dozen roses while i was at school. The card was inscribed "Truly yours". First off, roses are NOT even first date flowers...and secondly we haven't even been on our first date yet! Yes, I have attachment issues, and I feel he may as well but we are definitely on opposite poles here. HELP! Any advice on how to let him down easy? I feel terrible thinking about dropping him like that after he sent me those flowers but I am SO not ready for any kind of "relationship" right now. __________________ and she tears at the rags of a life they'll never see... |
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Pandita-in-training
Member Since Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
Posts: 27,289
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May 16, 2007 at 04:40 PM
#2
Wow! What a trip he's putting on you. I don't know if you can let someone like that down easy? Can you move across country? :-) I was fortunate that I was that far away from someone who "married the first person he kissed" (am I so glad I never let him kiss me!). I have a girlfriend and she had a guy who got serious, all alone, fast, and was looking at houses to buy for them to live in after they got married and they'd only had a couple dates!
I would just be sincere? Tell him the roses were lovely but you're not "ready for that kind of relationship right now." Make it look a little bit like your "fault" (you're not ready for the relationship) by using "I" statements rather than telling him he's over the top and hopefully he'll get the message? __________________ "Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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