I don't know if I was raped

I used to stay at my ex-boyfriends dorm. During one of those nights we had sex (I was aware of what we had done). After, we fell asleep (undressed). The next morning I woke up and there was a condom wrapper next to me which made me confused because I did not recall to have done anything else after the two of us fell asleep. When I asked him about it, he asked me if I didn't remember that there was a second time after and that he thought I had woken up because he heard me moan. But, I do not recall anything of it later there I just couldn't be with him because I just got a sense of anxiety and fear. I don't know if I was raped? Please this is a serious concern I have.

If you didn't consent, yes, it can be considered rape. (I say "it can be considered" because some people don't consider themselves victims of rape if they did not fully consent, but if you felt he shouldn't have, he shouldn't have and it's rape. Period.) Sleeping people cannot consent. Intoxicated people cannot consent (although not everyone knows that).

This video might be of help to you:



There are also two other forums on PC that might be of interest to you: namely the Post-Traumatic Stress forum (forums.psychcentral.com/post-traumatic-stress/) and the Survivors of Abuse forum (http://forums.psychcentral.com/survivors-abuse/). You're welcome to post on both (as well as here, of course).

I'm not sure I understand fully the circumstances so I have some questions if that's ok.

When this happened were you boyfriend/ girlfriend?

Were there 2 condom wrappers the next morning? Is that what I am to understand? This would make sense to concern but I just wanted to make sure....before I say more.