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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2007
Location: Fayetteville, AR
Posts: 2,798
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#1
i dont know why it makes me so mad whenever my boyfriend calls me hot or gorgeous or anything like that. i just want to yell at him that he's lying and it makes me really mad whenever he compliments me. am i just crazy?
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
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#2
for me and I can only speak for myself on this. it isn't that I get angry but I feel like people are just saying those things thinking that is what I want to hear. honestly it embarresses me. It is my very low opinion of myself. no self esteem at all. maybe that is what is going on.
__________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,467
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#3
I sometimes feel like that too
PS a friend IRL has a whole bunch of friendly "insults" which are fine with me __________________ |
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2007
Location: Fayetteville, AR
Posts: 2,798
17 2 hugs
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#4
yeah now that you mention it i guess i dont feel like theyre telling the truth. it feels like they just dont have the guts to say "youre ugly". i dont take compliments well at all with anything, not just physical. i feel so awkward when someone tells me i have done a good job or anything. some therapist said its because youre not praised enough as a child or something along those lines. good to know that im not crazy and it happens to other people.
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#5
I just wish that men would notice more than the body image. Do they compliment us on our brilliant minds? Do they compliment us on the beautiful voice we have or the way we can arm wrestle them or beat them at Scrabble or Monopoly all the time?
I get angry not because they compliment me but because of what they compliment me on. |
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Grand Member
Member Since Oct 2007
Location: Some place beyond myself, West Virginia
Posts: 999
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#6
Chicks have a hard time accepting compliments. This isn't on your boyfriends bad, this is yours. You need to learn to accept them and appreciate them. He probably does think those things about you. You'd surely miss them if he never said anything like that ever again, believe me.
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Pandita-in-training
Member Since Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
Posts: 27,289
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#7
For me, such comments are kind of an impersonal, "comic book" sort of remark and I don't need that? When my name isn't used or something specific to what it is that makes him think that ("You look lovely in that dress") there's kind of the sense that they could be looking at a picture in Playboy and come up with the same comment? That's maddening. I want to be appreciated for "Me" right here, right now.
__________________ "Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: AZ
Posts: 8,663
20 |
#8
My boyfriend isn't very verbal with his compliments. But I started noticing looks. I can tell when he likes the way I look when I walk through the door and he looks me up and down and smiles. I'm learning that he's just not a verbal guy, but his expressions and body language tell it ALL.
At first I was a little put off that he wasn't speaking it. Yet I've had boyfriends in the past who made me feel like a piece of meat. Grass is always greener eh? __________________ |
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
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#9
chicks? lol we have feathers? lol sorry could not resist that one. I much prefer lady or girl or woman lol
__________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: AZ
Posts: 8,663
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#10
I like being a "chic". Helps me keep my youth lol!
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2007
Location: Fayetteville, AR
Posts: 2,798
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#11
thats why i only mentioned the body image part. i know im intelligent and i know have musical talent so when he compliments my singing voice or piano skills or my intelligence it doesnt bother me. im confident in that part. its my body that im not confident in. and he does compliment me on the other things but i dont think about it b/c it doesnt bother me.
and yes "chicks" especially when you are one, is kind of derogatory. i also prefer women. considering i dont think any of us on here are girls anyways lol |
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