After giving birth nearly 17 years ago and after having gained weight, my stress incontinence worsened. I was never able to do kiegels - too triggering for my PTSD. I now have to wear light pads to prevent accidental leakage. I am only 45. I am afraid of surgery. I wish I could lose weight and see if that helps, but I am a mess, and my buttocks are deformed. I wear baggy clothes to hide my body. This is not how I imagined life in my 40s.

thankfully, this is now an issue that's now being recognized more (at least in the UK, adverts, products,) even other women talking about it.

it's defenetely nothing to be embarrassed about (it happens to me too at times)

I'm sorry you hide your body. I have BDD so totally get that

showers for me are the worst trigger

Originally Posted by raging vortex

thankfully, this is now an issue that's now being recognized more (at least in the UK, adverts, products,) even other women talking about it.

it's defenetely nothing to be embarrassed about (it happens to me too at times)

I'm sorry you hide your body. I have BDD so totally get that

showers for me are the worst trigger

@ragingvortex showers are a trigger for me too. I am in the US. They have a surgery for bladder issues, but it is not usually covered by insurance, and even if it was, I would be too afraid of surgery.

I cross my legs when I sneeze. But laughing is another issue.

Originally Posted by lillib

@ragingvortex showers are a trigger for me too. I am in the US. They have a surgery for bladder issues, but it is not usually covered by insurance, and even if it was, I would be too afraid of surgery.

I cross my legs when I sneeze. But laughing is another issue.

we don't have those surgeries.

it's probably something upcoming

not sure if I'd do it either though.

I hate needles

[Calypso2632]

idk if this is a contributing factor for anyone, but when i was on anti psychotics i was incontinent and has stress incontinence. i would leak when i coughed or sneezed. and wet the bed at night. ive also given birth, and have occasional issues if ive been sick and coughing a long period, but those meds and getting off them cleared an ongoing issue up fast. just thought id throw that out. it wasnt listed in the literature or as a side effect either. im also overweight. but 98% of the time i do not have any bladder leakage.

Originally Posted by raging vortex

we don't have those surgeries.

it's probably something upcoming

not sure if I'd do it either though.

I hate needles

@raging vortex I hate needles, too.

Originally Posted by Calypso2632

idk if this is a contributing factor for anyone, but when i was on anti psychotics i was incontinent and has stress incontinence. i would leak when i coughed or sneezed. and wet the bed at night. ive also given birth, and have occasional issues if ive been sick and coughing a long period, but those meds and getting off them cleared an ongoing issue up fast. just thought id throw that out. it wasnt listed in the literature or as a side effect either. im also overweight. but 98% of the time i do not have any bladder leakage.

@Calypso2632 Thank you for replying. I'm glad to hear that yours cleared up. I'm not on any psych meds, and haven't been for the past 10 years. I know it is from childbirth, and it often worsens with both weight gain and age. I have some intestinal issues, including a ton of polyps that need to be removed, so my weight gain isn't from overeating, though I do love my junk foods once in a while, and I can indulge in those at times, but in general, I eat a balanced meal and a typical caloric consumption for my height and weight. Nevertheless, after 40, and after weight gain that went with aging and my issues, my stress incontinence worsened.

Stress incontinence affects areas of life such as socialization, including feeling embarrassed when having to cross your legs every time you sneeze or withholding laughter for fear of leaking or not jogging/running for fear of leaking or feeling less attractive with an adult diaper or wearing maxi pads all the time. It also affects work, where you don't feel you're at your best when you have to wear maxi pads all the time, and the thoughts of stress incontinence affect concentration, working memory, production, and physical activity that we need to do to maintain health (e.g., taking breaks from sitting at your desk all day by going for walks).

That said, I'm glad that you were able to manage or ameliorate the problem once you got off the meds. Maybe the meds were loosening those organs, somehow. It's hopeful to hear that, even though you are still overweight, you were able to minimize or eradicate the leakage.

I'm sorry you struggled with that at one point, though. It's tough!

Originally Posted by lillib

@Calypso2632 Thank you for replying. I'm glad to hear that yours cleared up. I'm not on any psych meds, and haven't been for the past 10 years. I know it is from childbirth, and it often worsens with both weight gain and age. I have some intestinal issues, including a ton of polyps that need to be removed, so my weight gain isn't from overeating, though I do love my junk foods once in a while, and I can indulge in those at times, but in general, I eat a balanced meal and a typical caloric consumption for my height and weight. Nevertheless, after 40, and after weight gain that went with aging and my issues, my stress incontinence worsened.

Stress incontinence affects areas of life such as socialization, including feeling embarrassed when having to cross your legs every time you sneeze or withholding laughter for fear of leaking or not jogging/running for fear of leaking or feeling less attractive with an adult diaper or wearing maxi pads all the time. It also affects work, where you don't feel you're at your best when you have to wear maxi pads all the time, and the thoughts of stress incontinence affect concentration, working memory, production, and physical activity that we need to do to maintain health (e.g., taking breaks from sitting at your desk all day by going for walks).

That said, I'm glad that you were able to manage or ameliorate the problem once you got off the meds. Maybe the meds were loosening those organs, somehow. It's hopeful to hear that, even though you are still overweight, you were able to minimize or eradicate the leakage.

I'm sorry you struggled with that at one point, though. It's tough!

I'm a bit of a junk food fan myself

reading this post is making me crave KFC.

don't think I'm having that today though. not sure what I'm having, but it's raining so I won't be getting KFC.

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I'm a bit of a junk food fan myself

reading this post is making me crave KFC.

don't think I'm having that today though. not sure what I'm having, but it's raining so I won't be getting KFC.

Now I am craving KFC lol.

no one's mentioned the other issue, odour, having others pick up on it and then getting home to find that actually it's you..... embarrassing

though that can also be said for someone who's not showered
the embarrassment doesn't lessen

Originally Posted by raging vortex

no one's mentioned the other issue, odour, having others pick up on it and then getting home to find that actually it's you..... embarrassing

though that can also be said for someone who's not showered
the embarrassment doesn't lessen

I have had the odor issue a few times. And therapists wonder why I do not go out as much. Welp, the smell of soggy wet diapers might be one reason. The smell of stress another, which has been researched.

[AspiringAuthor]

I have stress incontinence when I cough a lot. I do not have a problem otherwise, and the problem that I have is due to anatomical/structural issues: an abnormally short urethra. In September I had a long coughing spell that lasted several weeks and I had to change sheets etc. I now want to buy adult diapers to wear at night next time I am sick with a cough.

Can anyone recommend a brand of adult diapers? I am size 22-24.